Subject: The tackiest wedding invitation EVER contest
Date: Jan 11 13:53
Author: Birdie
Mail Address:

I thought I'd sponsor a contest for the tackiest mormon wedding invitation in light of the one I received yesterday.

The wedding is 1 week away. It is printed on a 3x5 piece of white paper using a laser printer. There are 3 pictures of the couple, in various poses. The first shot has the couple with silly faces and a silly pose in front of a nature scene. The second shot is them snuggled in front of a tree. The third shot is the couple gazing into each other's eyes in front of the Bountiful temple.

The writing weaves about the photos, which are staggered about the construction paper. It is the tackiest thing I have ever seen. It is from one of my relatives in Utah.


Subject: especially conssidering it's the "Bountiful" temple...
Date: Jan 11 13:59
Author: kymba
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isn't that one of the, um, "better" temples in one of the "better" areas?

Actually, it doesn't sound bad to me, for a scrapbook or even to send to grandma- but not for a wedding invitation.

We don't get invited to many LDS weddings (imagine THAT!), but I must say that of those we have, they have been NOT tacky, for the most part. Pretty and nice, mostly.
The reception "food" is what gets me- and I'm not even made out of "hoity toity" stuff.
But come on- RICE KRISPY wedding cakes and jell-o?
I'd be embarrassed, and I'm not even of "worthy" pedigree!
:)

Are you going to the wedding?


Subject: Rice Krispie Hah Hah..
Date: Jan 11 14:04
Author: Penny
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Thats so funny. I thought that was just something weird with my Brother in-laws cake. Is this some silly thing that they have started?

Oh yah, at their reception no one got wedding cake because of the stupid reception line that took forever. Everyone left before they could cut the cake. They served jello pie's I think and non-toxic punch.


Subject: Jell-o PIE? What the...
Date: Jan 11 14:26
Author: kymba
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hell is THAT?

BTW- "non-toxic punch"- LOL! Funny. :)


Subject: For what it's worth..(wedding gift idea)
Date: Jan 11 14:38
Author: CalGal
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How about a set of jello molds? You know, those copper ones? One's shaped in a ring, one's in the shape of a fish..Tupperware also makes a jello mold.


Subject: Ding Dong Cake
Date: Jan 11 14:22
Author: Birdie
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My cousing had her wedding cake made entirely of ding-dongs. It wasn't frosted or anything. Coupled with the basket-ball court staging ground for the reception and the nut-cups tied to look like wedding bells, it was a classy event.


Subject: That actually sounds more pricey than a cake!...
Date: Jan 11 14:28
Author: kymba
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You figure- one DD per guest, 50 cents a pop, sheeeeeeeeeeesh.

I think it's a cool idea for my next party- thanks.
(But, don't worry, I don't mean a WEDDING party, for that IS really in poor taste.)


Subject: So the cake was a giant Rice Krispie treat??
Date: Jan 11 16:51
Author: BestBBQ
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Was it in tiers or just a big sheet-pan treat? Honest to gods, this is one of the weirdest things I've ever heard. Oh, *please* tell me it was in tiers with the white columns. Please, please, please!!!!! LOL


Subject: My wife got one once when we were engaged
Date: Jan 11 14:04
Author: Makurosu

It presented a picture of the couple, sitting on the edge of their fireplace wearing jeans and t-shirts. There was a roll of toilet paper standing on its end next to the bride. My then fiance showed it to me and said "I wanted you to see this as an example of what we are NOT doing."


Subject: THIS has to be the winner, people...
Date: Jan 11 14:24
Author: kymba
Mail Address:

Why was there a tp roll on the fireplace mantle? Was it in leiu of a Durflame log or other starting material?


Subject: They were probably just lighting farts (nt)
Date: Jan 11 16:33
Author: Richard the Bad
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Subject: I can't top that one,
Date: Jan 11 14:08
Author: tanstaafl
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a few I've received have come close, but its the laser printer COMBINED with not just one but THREE pictures that I cannot compete with.


Subject: It was the color of the paper and quality that got me. It was an ugly greenish color. n/t
Date: Jan 11 14:20
Author: sandisu
Mail Address:

 


Subject: No kidding.
Date: Jan 11 14:26
Author: Birdie
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When my husband opened it, he just starting snickering. I started laughing my head off when I looked at it, and the harder I looked, the more I laughed.

If it had just been one picture, I would have given them some slack because maybe they were trying to save money. But THREE pictures coupled with everything else put me over the edge.

I sincerely believe that they made the invitations themselves. Oh, and the paper was plain white, regular construction paper. These are not poor people!


Subject: I got one just like that a couple of months ago from a Nephew
Date: Jan 11 14:16
Author: sandisu
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it was horrible. It must have been done by the same outfit in Utah. I could not believe it, it was so ugly ! I don't know what I did with it. They had the Reception in Eureka CA about 3 weeks ago. I think they live in Provo ?


Subject: Tacky invitations?
Date: Jan 11 14:32
Author: Silky
Mail Address:

I don't send out a lot of stuff -- announcements, invitations, or even Christmas cards. Still, when I do, I hope the recipients of my feeble attempts are not judgemental. I'd like my friends/family to be happy to hear from me, and to be glad I could manage to send whatever it was I sent, and happy to see any pictures I included, even if they are "tacky".

In the grander scheme of things, "tacky" is a very fleeting concept. In a couple of decades we may all look back and laugh at how we look today. Love is important. Friendship is important. Respect is important. I'd rather send "tacky" invitations than be judgemental about invitations I have recieved.


Subject: Sigh
Date: Jan 11 15:16
Author: Birdie
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Okay, here goes.

This wedding invitation is tacky. It is not because it was put together with very little money, or because I don't like the way it was constructed.

It is tacky because it is representative of a mormon culture that is about turning a celebration of 2 people's commitment and love into a cheap mormon centered brainwashing fest. It is tacky because I recieved it 7 days before the wedding, and I live in another state. They have no consideration of how difficult it is for me to fly into Utah with a few weeks of notice to attend a wedding that I can't even attend. It is tacky because everything is thrown together at the last minute because they skipped all of the rest of the minutes in the rush to get married as soon as the guy gets home from his mission. It is tacky because they could have made an attempt to put together a nice, affordable wedding invitation that made people feel like they were being included in something special instead of feeling like they were getting an offer for a new credit card. It is tacky because it is not an expression of love and joy, it is a reminder of what I am expected to do or not do if I choose to have any relationship with my mormon friends and family.

And if I choose to express the pain that I am being excluded in all things family by poking fun at a close family member's wedding invitation, who doesn't give 2 flips about me know that I am an apostate, then that is what an anonymous bb is for. Maybe I'll be able to choke back the hurt and anger at the whole institution long enough to make it through the wedding without letting it come pouring out.


Subject: Re: Sigh
Date: Jan 11 15:49
Author: Silky
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This was an incredible post. Thank you for explaining. This is the sort of post that _might_ open the eyes of a loved one to the real pain that mormonism can cause. I hope you find comfort and healing. Thank you again for your honesty and openness.


Subject: Mormons just don't seem to get it.....
Date: Jan 11 21:05
Author: beaglie
Mail Address:

A wedding is not the time to cut corners. The fact that you send out a "tacky" invitation for something as important as a wedding, basically shows how what little importance one places on the event.

Having spent a good number of years living in Utah. And living the rest of my life in the greater New York area, I have to say that the Utah TBM attitude toward weddings is extremely appalling. They seem to be given less thought and attention than people here give to a Bridal Shower.beaglie


Subject: The bride probably made it as Young Women's project n/t
Date: Jan 11 14:46
Author: Flew the Coop
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Subject: I would NOT be surprised. nt
Date: Jan 11 16:42
Author: Joan L.
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Subject: The tackiest sealing EVER
Date: Jan 11 16:00
Author: greenbean

The day we were married in the Temple I had a cousin who was married a few years before in a Civil Ceremony and when they heard that we were going to be married in the Temple with all the relatives in attendence, they decided to get "sealed" that day too. I was so mad and disgusted with any "family" that would rather go see them sealed that we did not wait for them at the outdoor photo shoot, so almost half of our wedding guests were not in on our photos that attended nor did they hear of the breakfast later on. I guess my cousin thought that a sealing was as special as a wedding and wanted to move it up to the same level somehow.


Subject: Tacky wedding guest list
Date: Jan 11 16:20
Author: Caroline
Mail Address:

I have a older woman friend named Gene, spelled the man's way, with a house in Orem. She hasn't been in a Mo church since the 1950's. Her husband is Jewish. Somehow her name is on the local ward or stake list, maybe because for a few years (in the 1950's) they sent their kids to Primary. She doesn't know anyone in the neighborhood because they don't really live there; they live mostly in their 2 vacation homes and their granddaughter lives in the Orem house.

SO she keeps getting wedding invites addressed to Mr. and Mrs. Gene Sorenson (fake last name). Obvously some idioic couples just go down and list and invite everyone, even total strangers. It is so offensive. They must expect everyone to send them a gift. I suggested she wrap up a bunch of kitchy junk left over from yard sales and send it--the kind of stuff on sale for 50 cents, reduced from $1.99 BUt anyone who would make a wedding cake out of rice krispies and serve jello pie would probably love her trash.


Subject: Tackiest invitation is a postcard..
Date: Jan 11 16:33
Author: srice
Mail Address:

that tells you the couple is getting married and for more information go to their website. The postcard didn't have the time, date, ect... Just their names and their parents names and the website. Now that was tacky.

In regards to inviting people you don't know, when my husband and I got married his TBM mom wanted to invite all her ward friends. I said no, I don't even know these people and neither did my husband. After she whined for awhile I said whatever but you have to pay for the extra punch and cake for these people. I don't remember how many she invited but I think only about 4-6 of them showed up.


Subject: Wow, that IS tacky!! n/t
Date: Jan 11 16:40
Author: Birdie
Mail Address:

n/t


Subject: Top This!
Date: Jan 11 17:49
Author: Sparky

Picture the scene:

A small reception held in the Relief Society room in the kind of chapel that has the horseshoe shaped hall that skirts the perimeter of the back of the chapel and the entire "cultural hall" - I believe they were all Stake Centers - very popular model for many years - it has the Baptism font behind the stage - with an accordian door in the Primary room and the font - so you can watch the baptism by opening up both accordian doors?

Anyway - back to the Relief Society Room.

You walk through the door, draped with canvas like the door into a circus tent. Inside is the bride and groom dead ahead - standing under an arch that is also covered with bright pinkish purpleish canvas to look like a circus tent.

There are about three small round tables - each covered with a pink and purple striped table cloth. On each table is a centerpiece of an ice elephant - If I remember correctly, the ice was "dyed" so the elephants were all pink.

The centerpiece was surrounded by a short bucket type container full of Jelly beans (all purple and pink) and pink popcorn.

The cake table had cracker jacks, popcorn, peanuts, punch and I kid you not - a person handing out balloons to guests.

There was also a cotton candy machine on the end of the cake area and someone got to stand there and make cotton candy.

The person at the gift table was dressed as a clown and the person cutting the cake was dressed as a trapeze artist.

Yikes - at the time I heard people talking about how clever this was - all while a basketball game was going on in the "cultural hall".

Top that!

Steve


Subject: I think THIS one is the winner!
Date: Jan 11 17:53
Author: Birdie
Mail Address:

Man, I about choked laughing. And I am sure my imagination can hardly do it justice!


Subject: Re: I think THIS one is the winner!
Date: Jan 11 17:55
Author: stephanie
Mail Address:

NO DOUBT.
WE HAVE A WINNER.
HOW WOULD ONE "DRESS UP LIKE A TRAPEZE ARTIST", THOUGH?


Subject: Yeah, I'm trying to picture this...
Date: Jan 11 18:38
Author: Debbie PA

Garments under leotards? And those little ballet slippers? This "theme wedding" thing is pretty hilarious....is that common out west or what? I've never heard about or been to such a thing.

Just for the record, when I got married, we went to the DC temple from PA on Friday. Got our endowments on Friday (temple name: Agnes..ewww) and married on Saturday morning. Saturday afternoon we drove the 4 hours back to PA and had our reception, as is not unusual in this part of the country, in a fire hall, which doubles as a cultural hall for weddings, dinners, reunions, etc. The food was great, by the way...no jello in sight. Anyway, when we went up front to thank everybody some relatives and friends had gifts they wanted us to open in front of the whole reception. One from the church members was a quilt that they had made with squares that reflected things in our life, including a square with a replica of my wedding dress made out of my wedding dress material, which was made by a friend. OK..that was really nice and special. But then, there was a little gift that several people were urging us to open. In front of everybody, I pulled out this tiny little fur-trimmed sexy red and black negligee thing. Me, in my long-sleeved, high necked gown with garments underneath. Imagine the looks on the faces of the TBM church members in the audience. It was mortifying at the time, but looking back, it's pretty funny. All the normal, healthy-minded non-Mo relatives just assumed that we'd find bawdy fun in celebrating the fact that we'd be screwing like bunnies on our wedding night, while the TBMs, including my husband and myself, thought this was soooo inappropriate. How tight-assed was I, anyway? I shudder to think about it.

Debbie


Subject: Thanks for making me laugh. Has to be the funniest thing I've heard in a while (n/t)
Date: Jan 11 21:10
Author: beaglie
Mail Address:

 


Subject: storybook invitation
Date: Jan 11 20:41
Author: loitering
Mail Address:

hahahha these are all too funny. I will have to say though that this one particular invitation comes to mind. It was like a "storybook" you opened it and it had maybe 3-4 pages with words of their story along with picutures....starting out once a upon a time...peter preisthood met molly mormon.....by the end it said come enjoy us happily ever after at the reception blah blah. It was so dumb. Also they have to say that is was solemized in the blank temple so all their little mormon friends know it was a 'worthy' marriage.