Subject: they wont leave my almost 8 yr old daughter alone
Date: Jan 18 02:01 2003
Author: Cherie (note:  Mormons believe children should be baptized at age 8)

I left the church over a year ago, I have a daughter who will be 8 not until NOVEMBER and the mormons are already on our doorstep inviting her to pre-baptism firesides and now they even mail her things in the mail about being baptized., buy her books on it, and send kids to the door to tell her about being baptized. My ex husband (her dad) insists she be baptized as well. GREAT! Now my TBM family is really on my case about getting her baptized. Im starting to dread her 8th birthday. Any advice on how to handle things would be great. Thanks

Subject: From what I understand......
Date: Jan 18 02:19
Author: Lord Of The Onion Rings

If you call her bishop and make it clear that you refuse to give permission for her to be baptized, they won't do it. They have to have the permission of both parents to baptize anyone under 18.

Subject: Oh , I hope you are right! The pursuit of an 8 yr. old is just sick. n/t
Subject: Think it may be state/state -
Date: Jan 18 14:08
Author: Susan I/S

but in some states I believe that if one parent is opposed they wait till the child is 18. Of course, this still doesn't take the pressure off of you.

Subject: i suppose that state which allows baptism without permission would be —
Date: Jan 18 14:10
Author: J.

UTAH, by any chance!

Subject: Cherie, this may be difficult for you to do, but........
Date: Jan 18 15:01
Author: MoNoMo

turn on the "bitch switch" and let out a little anger. And while you're in the mood, call the bishop and tell him to call his goons off as it only increases the dislike of Mo'ism.

The church disregards parental rights it seems unless you make a stand.

Subject: I've got a pet.........
Date: Jan 18 15:34
Author: TheVet

alligator named JAWS that I'd be more than happy to loan you for a bit.

You are up against awesome odds. Do I give in on this one - or fight like hell.

I recommend fighting like hell. Good people or not, they still are bastards.

Subject: I'm in the same exact boat....
Date: Jan 18 15:45
Author: anon

here's what you do:

1) Tell your daughter that (cutting to the chase) mormons are full of sh*t and the reasons why.

2) Then tell her that people believe in an imaginary god to make themselves feel better about death...and go into detail. She'll understand.

3) Tell her that if she gets baptized she's promising to give her money and time to the church and that she's allowing other people to tell her what she can wear, watch, listen to, and whom to date when she's older. Go into detail and then ask her if that's what she wants. She'll probably say no.

DO NOT GIVE CONSENT TO LET HER GET BAPTIZED. The church cannot baptized a minor without BOTH parents giving consent. If they do, they're setting themselves up for some major lawsuit actions.

Love your daughter. Teach her to think about everything. Teach her to question everyone. She'll figure it out.

Subject: Re: they wont leave my almost 8 yr old daughter alone
Date: Jan 18 15:46
Author: r8chel

I had the same problem with my now 9 yo daughter. It was amazing how popular we were for 6 months leading up to her birthday and then several months after. I was probably too mild, just smiling and saying "no, thank you." Her birthday is in March and by that July my TBM sil called on the day her daughter was getting baptized to tell me my brother could just baptize my daughter too (what? baptize a child who hasn't attended a day of primary in her life?) I think that was my last "no, thank you." After it was clear we weren't going to baptize her we heard from NO ONE for over a year - ahhhhh, what a nice break.

Subject: Ditto. Same story with me. Two men came to my door from the stake. . .
Date: Jan 18 15:53
Author: free

saying that it was essential for my daughter's salvation for her to get baptized. I said, "I will let my daughter make the choice on her own when she is 18." Then they went on to say, "But it is better if she get's baptized when she is young." "Why?" I asked. I knew the real answer, but I wanted to get them thinking.

Of course, they want to baptize her young and indoctrinate her. If you indoctrinate a child through the teen years, then you usually have a brainwashed little robot. That is my opinion.

Just tell them that she can be baptized as an adult on her own free will.

Subject: Or you could take her to a bunch of churches & ask her if she wants to be baptised
Date: Jan 18 17:30
Author: SusieQ#1

into any of them, and if she chooses one, invite all the MORGBOTS to attend!! Send formal invitations, have a reception, the whole nine yards!! Then if she changes her mind later, she can be baptised in another church and you can do it again the next year and the next....
just a thought! :-)

Subject: Be bitchy right up front!!
Date: Jan 18 18:22
Author: James, the experienced

Cherie, do you ever have to be pro-active on this one!!! Right from the beginning!

A call to the bishop to remind him of your parental authority is the first step. Remind him in your firm voice that under no circumstances will you allow 'visitors' attempting to indoctrinate the sweet mind of your child. Personally, I would threaten with media exposure via a letter from an attorney if your wishes are not acknowledged.

I consider this WAR, big time! Don't let them even get a foot in the door on this one.

Subject: I used that apporach......
Date: Jan 18 18:49
Author: Lord Of The Onion Rings

and it does work. I have been very clear about how I feel about Mormonism since I left. I made it clear that the first member of my family that tries to convert her will get a foot up the ass. This does work and there's no questions asked.

Subject: I let my daughter choose for herself
Date: Jan 18 18:42
Author: hrp

As my daughter approached 8 years old, I had been an apostate for 22 years. My TBM family expected that my daughter would be baptized. I didn't want her to do that but I didn't want to make the decision for her. So I sat down with my daughter on a couple of afternoons and had good talks about religion, why I wasn't religious, why a person might want to be involved in religion, and most importantly, what the Mormon church expected the role of a woman should be (mother and homemaker and second fiddle to the TBM husband).

That last point convinced my daughter that she didn't want to have anything to do with the Morg. So that was her decision, I supported her in it, and she was never baptized. When my TBM family asked, I just said that daughter and I had jointly decided that she would not be baptized -- end of subject. My wife didn't care one way or the other.

I suggest you tell everybody to cease and desist talking to your daughter about baptism, and then follow up with actions if need be. You are the parent, you are in control here, and other people have no business going around you to put pressure on your daughter. This could result in some nasty confrontations, so be prepared. I assume you are the custodial parent, so you should be able to make the decision, not your daughter's father.


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