Subject: Your silliest or most despised calling?
Date: Jan 24 12:52 2003
Author: Scott Jensen

Most despised was EQ president--like trying to light a fire with wet kindling

Silliest: Ward Beautification Committee member. Actually called to it and set apart!!!!!!
Best always,

Subject: Oklahoma City II Ward - Song Book Corrdinator..
Date: Jan 24 13:00
Author: Bill Clark

..kept the song books straight in the chapel.

Bill Clark
Texas Apostate

Subject: "executive secretary" to the 2nd counselor in the Bishop-prick....
Date: Jan 24 13:05
Author: danboyle

He actually had me make one or two phone calls per week for him to set up appts, then call him to tell him who/where etc. (talk about a make-work calling). But the WORST part was he told me to ask the husband for his ok BEFORE extending a calling to the WIFE. I never did that, I just let him think I did. what a joke

Subject: Primary Chorister Was a Hoot!
Date: Jan 25 01:39
Author: Marisa

Up to that point in my life, i had never had so much fun. (Since then, especially since having left the MORG, I've had experinces that were lots more fun, but at that point, it was as good as anything got.) It was the most creative calling I could ever have imagined. My ward meetinghouse was small enough that we didn't divide up for junior and senior primary, so you had about sixty little guys from three or four up until their twelfth birthdays. (I can't remember if the Sunbeams usually came in or stayed in the nursery.) Most of the teachers were useless at helping to maintain order, so I had to devise innovative ways of holding these babies' attention for the last twenty-five minutes or so of an already far too long morning. I had this calling when I was in college. It was extremely valuable preparation for teaching in the public school system. The songs were asinine, but it was a challenge and it definitely had its rewards.
The worst job, for me, was Familty Home Evening unit leader for my ward at BYU.

Subject: If I had been an EQP, it would have been my most hated, hehe
Date: Jan 24 13:08
Author: sonoflds

I like your analogy. But mine was the Stake Dance Music Reviewer. Yeah, that's right, the Stake Dance Music Reviewer. I was supposed to go over the music the youth was going toplay at dances and review if it was appropriate (I used to be a rock DJ in my younger years and have a rather extensice record/CD collection. Word got out and I guess I was "qualified" for the calling). I really don't think that they knew I watched MTV. =)

I didn't hate it but it sure was silly.

Subject: I've liked most of my callings....
Date: Jan 24 13:11
Author: dimmesdale

but one I really hated was "Ward Communication Chairman."

We were supposed to find any tidbit of information that might be newsworthy and then try to sell it to the papers. We always had to write it up with an LDS spin---"This father attributes his success to---the family home evening he had when he was a young child and member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints..." that sort of thing.

Another job I hated was RS counselor. The other counselor was a "spiritualistic" type that wanted us to pray before everything and come to the same strong feeling about everything we did. Well, as any of you who've been reading my stuff knows, I don't even comprehend that whole thing, so it was a little difficult for me.

Subject: Does an RS counselor actually counsel?
Date: Jan 24 13:21
Author: Lilith

What did the 'duties' turn out to really be?

Subject: Home teacher
Date: Jan 24 13:12
Author: tanstaafl

particularly when my dad was EQ pres and I was a deacon and he would send me out with men whose regular companions were unavailable. One time I went out with a guy who hated it even more than me. He even needed to stop off at a bar for a drink before hitting the next house. For some reason, that pissed me off more than anything, here I was stuck home teaching, which I was forced to do because I was a minor, and he was an adult that didn't want to do it either, but he lacked the balls to just say no.

Subject: Friggin' Scout Master of a bunch of BRATTY Mormon Kids... SUCKED!!! (nt)
Subject: silliest: greeter coordinator
Date: Jan 24 13:39
Author: tri girl

My first calling at the Lord's University was to assign two girls to stand by the door of the relief society room (aka, law building classroom) and greet the special sweet spirits that entered. I was also in charge of putting a centerpiece on the table. My favorite was when I put my roomate's stuffed Odie and Garfield on the table. I got a subesequent lecture on spirituality from the RM relief society pres.

Most despised calling: visiting teacher!

Subject: Ward Young Adult Leader
Date: Jan 24 14:21
Author: Kim

Christ, what a hellish calling!

They made me do things I didn't particularly feel like doing.

Subject: Hey I got kicked out of that calling by my Bishop
Date: Jan 24 15:16
Author: Emma Mae

for attending a young adult Sunday School class where the teacher didn't show up for a good 15 minutes. Then someone stood up, started to just talk a little to the class asking the my male counterpart in the calling what was on the agenda for young adults that month.

The next Tuesday I was brought in to talk to the Bishop and there stood a good friend of mine, and another girl. They were already in talking to the Bishop when I arrived. I was invited in and when I got there the Bishop read me the riot act for allowing the class to talk about the activities. Like it was my place to get up there and stop them from discussing it? So, the Bishop released me right there and looked over to this other girl, saying the calling was now hers, then reached across the desk and shook her hand. He said I was released right there.

I left his office in tears. I have no idea what happened or why I released really. My counter-part (young adult male) was not released and he was the one that was doing all the talking.

I even asked my friend what the hell that as all about and why she was in there. She told me then and still tells me today she had no idea why she was there. Yeah right! Like I really believe that.

Subject: Eeew, I had that job, too.
Date: Jan 24 17:46
Author: Stray Mutt

I had to badger people into attending activities and firesides I didn't want to go to myself. Hell, we lived in Los Angeles where there are several hundred thousand things more entertaining than, say, barbershop quartet night. Our stake YA leaders were total dweebs and suck ups who evidently had no social lives outside YA. It was pathetic.

The dumbest job was being called to be the priest quorum secretary in my college ward two weeks before being ordained an elder and leaving for my mission.

Subject: The one I 'hated' the most and...
Date: Jan 24 14:57
Author: Bashful

complained the most about was,back then it was called,
Homemaking counselor..I lived in about 9 different wards and 1 branch and more times than not I would always get called to be the H. counselor (that is 'a desperate to find anyone to do it' calling)..I guess because I had alittle craft ability or could have been because I couldn't say NO!..I HATED IT...Every month having to plan 'The Event' with little or no help..and the budget for it was so small that most of the expenses and refreshments would come out of my pocket because I wanted it to be 'perfect'.
Even when I became inactive, my so called sister friends still would call me to teach classes..Yuck, gag, barf...
and even tho I had stop going to church I still couldn't say NO!!! What is wrong with that picture?? I look back on those years and see such a waste of my time and efforts.

I also think that being RS Counselor really sucked because when we had our semi-monthly meetings, I felt it was one big session to gossip about the other members. It was not productive at all.

Live and learn, but with your head "OUT" of the sand.

Subject: silliest: Primary activities coordinator
Date: Jan 25 03:57
Author: nonmemberfriend

as a 16 year old priest I was plan games in the gymnasium to occupy the children before primary started,and afterwards, until their parents picked them up. I lasted 2 weeks and quit.

Subject: I hated playing the piano in church
Date: Jan 24 15:06
Author: Makurosu

When you're a meeting accompaniest, you're everybody's doormat. I think church hymns are awkward to play, and so I've always had trouble with them. So, I need to practice the night before if I'm going to play them. I would get choristers who would want me to change the hymn because they couldn't wave their arms to the right time. Good grief!

My wife despised my calling in the Elder's Quorem presidency. I was always having to stay late after Church for some meeting, or having to call people to get their home teaching stats, etc. She wasn't the only disgruntled wife. We were in a meeting once, and one of the wives barged in, banging the door against the wall, and demanded to know when we were ever going to be done "with this stupid meeting." Her husband was released shortly thereafter.

The calling that I was really good at, but that I deeply regret today, was that of "finding lost sheep." I had a calling for the stake finding out where inactives had run off to. I went to the post office to get their forwarding address, called 411, went to where they used to live and interviewed neighbors, etc. I located about 50% of them. I look back at that now with my head in my hands and think "Oh God, what have I done?!"

Subject: Playing piano or organ was my favorite calling...
Date: Jan 24 15:58
Author: Kim

...because for me, it was relatively easy to do. The hymns were simple for me and I had most of them memorized and could play them with my eyes closed. Playing for the choir was a little more challenging, but that kind of challenge was fun. I liked these callings because it was a sure guarantee to NOT have to give talks in church.

It's true about being used as a doormat when you're a musician in church though. However, whenever I was asked last minute or a day before to provide a musical number in Sacrament Meeting, I had no problem saying NO. I told them I would be happy to do it if notified at least several weeks or a month in advance, but it is unfair to expect it without adequate preparation time...even if I could have played something on the spur of the moment. It's the principle of the thing. I don't like to "half-ass" my music.

Subject: I don't know what it was about the hymns
Date: Jan 24 17:13
Author: Makurosu

I don't know why I had such a hard time playing them. I've played the piano all my life, learned classical pieces, play sometimes by ear, etc. But I had the worst time with hymns from the hymnbook.

I learned to say no eventually, but sometimes it was hard. Especially when you get called out of the congregation from the pulpit to come up and play the piano in priesthood meeting.

Subject: As missionary: a computer programmer ... and a bunch more ...
Date: Jan 24 15:07
Author: Weeder

this was long before the current slew of alternative mission experiences started appearing.

This was under Linsey R. Curtis (Oakland 79-80).

He had quite a few of these special callings:

Missionary Auto-mechanic.
Mission WELDER (both settline(sp?) and arch)
Mission auto converted (gas to electricity and entered in the then popular Energy-conservation fair in San. Fran. -- yep I did this one too).
I also was probably the first and last "Mission Study Chairman" -- produced a weekly study guide called "The Weekly Weeder" which dealt with VERY esoteric aspects of mormon doctrine (the MP's wife LOVED it, so my corruptions continued :-))

BTW my computer programs were later used in several other missions.

Subject: Hey Weeder
Date: Jan 24 16:11
Author: Elwood

Saw you mention Lindsay R. Curtis in another thread too and wanted to ask what he was like. Part of the reason for the question is I know his brother, Legrand, who was a GA, and he is one of my least favorite people. Does being an uptight, self-righteous, thoughtless jerk run in the family?

Subject: In the most general sense ...
Date: Jan 24 16:49
Author: Weeder

I'd have to say I really liked Lindsay. He was full of off the wall ideas (mormon missionary mechanics) and persued his ideas. When I brought up troubling stuff to his attention he seemed very down to earth with most of his views. He did have a few wacho ideas that made my blood boil or my eyes roll but then the same is probably true of people that know me.

I think the wackiest he ever got was on the subject of sex (and this topic didn't come up too often in missionary life -- at least with the MP present).

I really don't know too much about the Curtis family, etc. and even when asked about his family he never seemed to say too much (I was in the mission home 1 year and 1 month).

Subject: Bulliten Board Specialist-Wasn't that special, now. nt

Subject: just about anything in a singles' ward, but here are a couple
Date: Jan 24 15:21
Author: spinner

1) Institute committee co-chair. This may not sound so bad except when you consider that it happened while I was at BYU and about 75% of the ward were BYU students required to take institute classes. The bishopric thought I was a UVSC student so they had the inspiration to give me this calling, even though I was also at BYU. I was set apart and never did a single damn thing.

2) Elders' quorum redeeming the dead committee. The sum total of the calling amounted to one of three members on the committee making a monthly announcement about the ward temple trip.

It really was idiotic how they tried to make sure everybody had a calling, no matter how contrived the position was or how silly the calling sounded.

Subject: Nursery, nursery, nursery!!! n/t
Subject: Silliest: RS newsletter writer Most despised VT
Date: Jan 25 00:04
Author: Gail

Gossip is something I really do not care for (esp at the level the RS gossips). It can be informational but in Mormon life was malicious and nasty.


Subject: Re: Your silliest or most despised calling?
Date: Jan 25 00:05
Author: ORFinn

Silliest calling - substitute primary teacher. I was never asked to teach once in about a year.

Most despised calling - there were several. The first one was ward single adult leader. I was a new convert and I was supposed to contact people I didn't know. I called one person. She said, "I don't go to that church any more." Didn't ever call anyone else. I should have clued in on that response. Would have saved many years of wasted time.

The next one was - Stake Primary Music Leader. I don't and didn't know hardly anything about music. We had worthless preparation meetings. I had to go visit wards that were far away and leave two small children at home. Another time waster.

The last was my last calling - RS Enrichment Counselor. I literally laughed at the "bishop" when he extended that calling. I told him he didn't know me too well. I'm not into all that homemaking and craft stuff. RS is one messed up organization. We couldn't do anything without having the bishop's permission. I got to see first hand about the condescending attitude of the "priesthood." It's funny how I could run the rest of my life without any help from men. But, had to run the nursery the way the bishop wanted. Had to wait and wait to get women called to the board. Had a tiny budget, but was supposed to come up with great ideas for the "sisters."

The good thing about that calling was that I finally saw the light and got out of the morg.

Subject: Re: Your silliest or most despised calling?
Date: Jan 25 00:42
Author: Mujibur

Bean Counter. Ward financial clerk. All tithes and offerings should be sent directly to SLC, it all ends up there anyway. The job is totally unnecessary

Subject: Seminary Pres
Date: Jan 25 01:59
Author: Puffrider

Maybe it was just in our stake, but I attended four years of early morning seminary. When I was a senior I got called as seminary pres and the new program was self study. We had a teacher come in once in a while to verify that indeed we were working. I hated it I was nothing but an unpaid hall monitor! If the kids didn't want to complete their work who was I to harass them.

Recovery from Mormonism -