|Subject:||Was Sunday EVER a "day of rest" when you were a TBM [Mormon]?|
|Date:||Sep 21 10:15|
|The idea of the Sabbath is that one day out of seven
you can step back from your busy, hassled life and recharge your soul.
Even if you aren't religious, it's a great idea.
Once a week get your perspective on life back. Do things that remind you of how beautiful the world is. Spend time on the things that fulfill you and bring you closer to you friends and family. Take a day off for yourself and those you care about. Spend time only where it counts the most.
But is that what REALLY happens across the church on Sunday?
For most Mormons, Sunday is a day of constant turmoil. Numerous assignments and reports and meetings and getting kids ready and being lectured to constantly--by the end of the day you're not rested, you're exhausted.
The only thing that's pleasant is that desperate feeling of escape when you can finally go home, take an aspirin and lay down.
But no one at church sees the hypocrisy in all of this. What do they think that commandment is talking about? Atheists and inactives have a better perspective on the concept than believers.
|Subject:||A recent news story...|
|Date:||Sep 21 10:37|
|...(I don't have the reference to it) said that
people *need* periodic get-away-from-it-all. The best cycle is, coincidentally
enough, 7 days.
Without this rest, people suffer mental disorders - sometimes as bad as bipolar disorder (was called manic depressive syndrome).
Could the stress of Sundays in mormonism be the cause of Utah's high antidepressant use? One of these days, I'd like to see the antidepressant data given completely so we could examine all of the groupings - like religion, age and field-of-work. It would be a *hoot* to find out that mormons are the *largest* group of users in the state!
|Subject:||Chronic Sunday headaches|
|Date:||Sep 21 10:42|
|You mentioned aspirin. That reminded me of the
chronic headaches I suffered while I was a TBM. Did anyone else suffer
chronic headaches on Sundays when they attended Mormon church services?
I suspect my chronic headaches were due to wearing a tie and sitting in sacrament meeting with my head held up looking at the podium. That sustained head position while wearing a tie could reduce blood circulation to the brain.
Whatever the reason, I haven't suffered a headache on Sunday since I left the church! I haven't wore a tie on Sunday since then either.
Even for TBMs, Sundays are no day of rest until maybe in the late afternoon when you might be able to sneak in a nap. I don't miss the drudgery or Mormon Sundays at all.
|Subject:||Yes, I did too|
|Date:||Sep 21 11:07|
|My headaches were from low blood sugar. In addition
to the three-hour block, there were always activities or meetings before
or after, plus the time it took to get ready. We always had to eat as a
family, and breakfast was always something like cold cereal, which
wasn't substantial enough to last me through all the meetings and stuff.
It was a long time between meals. By the time I got home, I was so
hungry I was trembling.
Also, I think sitting in boring, hour-long meetings made me feel the headaches all the more. Maybe they just seemed worse than they really were because I was so bored.
Fast Sundays sucked worse. My wife didn't fast, and after awhile I stopped too.
|Date:||Sep 21 11:21|
|I used to get Sunday headaches every week whilst
growing up - airless rooms, too long sitting still, dehydration plus
probably just boredom. Sundays weren't really a day of rest in my home -
my parents trying to get 6 kids ready for church was a nightmare. Then
dad would still be a church late counting tithing or in a meeting or
seeing someone, and mum would hate that, so there was always stress. We
had to write in our journals, write letters, go visiting - all the
things we didn't do during the week.
When I left the church, I thought it might feel weird to not be going on Sundays after so many years of doing so, but it wasn't. It was wonderful, and took no time at all to adjust to my new-found freedom. It was like being given the gift of another whole day of the week. Saturdays are often very busy for me, so now I adore having Sundays as my rest day, whereas before, with Saturday being so busy and then church, firesides etc etc on Sundays, I had no relaxatino time on weekends... Long live Sundays with no church!!
|Subject:||Good point. Sunday headaches...I couldn't have survived them without Imitrex.|
|Date:||Sep 21 19:11|
|Now, I just sleep late and go hiking in the
afternoon most Sundays. No need for drugs.
|Subject:||Re: Was Sunday EVER a "day of rest" when you were a TBM?|
|Date:||Sep 21 11:00|
|Sunday was a day I totally dreaded. It was not much
fun trying to get the kids ready while TBM hubby was already at
meetings. Then having to be preached at during sm about how we were
never doing enough, our kids were never doing enough, and being looked
down on by those who had it all done.
I remember finding ways to get out of going to church thinking "Is there anything I really need to be there for?" Pretty soon there was nothing I needed to be there for.
Having to go in separate cars, it really drew the family together, don't you think? Then coming home only to realize that there was choir practice(you had to wear your Sunday garb, no jeans or pants for ladies) or the fireside you were expected to go to that night.
Most TBM's I have ever known try to put a guilt trip on you if you complain about all the church crap that everyone goes to on Sunday. But I noticed that after sm, many of the elite TBM stayed in the foyer to talk, and never went to meetings. I worked in the library, and it was amazing to see how many folks just floated in to get something and ended up staying to waste time there.
So even though TBMs act like the Sunday marathon is serving HV, their actions don't really show it.
|Subject:||I just drove past our local ward house on my way to the grocery store . . .|
|Date:||Sep 21 11:03|
|to pick up a Diet Coke for me and vegetables for my
backyard zoo family of tortoises, iguanas and bearded dragons.
The chapel parking lot was packed with vehicles--at 7:15 in the morning.
No doubt, the early bird Saints were all inside, resting. :)
|Subject:||When I was in a Bishopric my typical Sunday schedule:|
|Date:||Sep 21 21:19|
|When I was in a Bishopric my typical Sunday
5:00a Arise, say prayers, get ready, eat (if time permitted - read scriptures)
6:30a Goto chapel for meetings
6:45a Bishopric meeting
7:45a Leadership meeting (rotated weeks between Welfare, Ward Council, PEC, Missionary)
8:45a Last minute TODO(s) before Sacrament meeting
8:55a Sit on stand for Sacrament meeting
10:10a Greet members, arrange interviews, make sure classes/auxiliaries staffed
10:25a Impromptu quick interviews (usually to issue callings, set apart people for callings, or temple recommend interviews) or sometimes go give talk in Primary or youth SS class or just visit a youth class
11:00a Get ready for Priesthood opening exercises
11:05a Head into chapel for opening exercises
11:10a Priesthood opening exercises
11:20a More impromptu quick interviews or visit a priesthood class or YW class or RS or Primary
12:00p Greet members, arrange interviews, etc.
12:15p Impromptu interviews (issuing callings, setting apart people for callings or Aaronic priesthood ordinations, temple recommend interviews, welfare interviews or other interviews in behalf of Bishop, youth interviews, etc.)
1:00p Open up envelopes for Clerks to enter tithing receipts into computer. Prepare deposit for bank. Bishop would regularly step out of his office doing interviews into the clerk office 2-3 times each week he was doing "welfare" interviews with a note having a name and dollar amount. So we'd prepare a check from fast offering funds and me/clerk would sign them, put them in a sealed envelope and hand it to the person in the hall as respectfully and sincerely as possible.
2:00p After troubleshooting is done, welfare interviews done and deposit done - I'd give one of the clerks a ride home AFTER we went to the bank together.
3:00p Home at last. Eat something quickly. Spend a few quality minutes with my kids. Talk to my wife briefly about her day at church and problems with kids.
3:20p On the phone following up on messages, following up on callings' questions, following up on church activities, following up on missionary activities, following up on getting rides for youth fireside, going home teaching & visiting members, etc.
5:00p Kiss wife goodbye, off to visit members and home teaching families for 2 hours before fireside.
7:00p Pick up 2 youth and head to fireside.
8:30p Socialize with youth and leaders after fireside.
9:00p Head home with 2 youth and goto my home.
9:45p HOME AT LAST!! kids asleep, wife tired, lonely and upset. How could she be upset? I was doing the Lord's work.
Praise Jesus!! My day of rest!!
|Subject:||Still, I'll bet you didn't get all your home teaching done. .So,|
|Date:||Sep 21 21:44|
|that Sunday's work was all for nothing. Perfection
is a bastard.
|Subject:||We went to the art museum today, it's free on Sundays|
|Subject:||Since I left the church, Sundays have become my most beautiful day of the week...|
|Date:||Sep 21 11:31|
|Author:||Renewed for Once|
|Especially just before the sun comes up. I thought
I'd sleep-in once I had my Sundays "off", but the family
always wanted to get away to the canyons, park etc. There's no traffic,
you can actually hear birds and it's terrific to just watch the sunrise
with your family.
I'm more religious now - no, SPIRITUAL now - than ever before. And I think our kids are too.
Why did abstract rules becomes more important than first-hand experience? Sundays are no longer sad, they are deeply refreshing. Thank God.
|Subject:||It also makes a weekend possible...|
|Date:||Sep 21 11:38|
|It use to be that we only had one day because we had
to be back for church. Now two-day getaways are possible.
|Subject:||Re: It also makes a weekend possible...|
|Date:||Sep 21 12:11|
|AMEN to that! I have seen so many families duck out
early Friday afternoon to go to Lake Powell (Southern Utah) or camping
in the mountains and then have to leave those areas on Sat afternoon to
get back in time for Sunday meetings.
I used to dread weekends. Saturday was filled with shopping with the hoards of other mormons in the store, laundry, lesson or talk prep, cleaning house etc. Sunday was always a nightmare and I hated wrestling the kids while their father sat on the stand in some leadership postion or another. Many families do not let their kids play outside on Sunday or even get out of their Sunday clothes, so there is always the boredom at home after meetings. I never really knew what a weekend was until I left the church and now Sundays are my favorite day. If I want to go shopping, I do. The stores here in Utah are not crowded and I never worry about getting it done on Saturday. I do my laundry on Sunday now and it has turned Saturday into play day.
I really think you may be on to something about not getting a break and rest once a week contributing to emotional problems.
|Subject:||It's so ironic...|
|Date:||Sep 21 12:20|
|...that Mormons designate Monday night for Family
MOST people spend Sunday relaxing with their families. Mormons run around doing church chores.
|Subject:||People sure get conned easy: Sunday = Rest = Hard Labor.|
|Subject:||I've had more rest in the past 4 inactive Sundays than I had during all of my TBM Sundays combined.|
|Date:||Sep 21 17:01|
|No preparing the sacrament. Gathering people to
bless / pass. Worrying about bread. Folding chairs. Folding tables.
Unfolding chairs. Unfolding tables. Preparing talks. Preparing lessons.
Interviews, interviews, interviews. Meetings, meetings, meetings.
You can keep it!
|Subject:||I was just marveling earlier in the week|
|Date:||Sep 21 17:12|
|that I hadn't had a headache on Sunday for a long
time. In fact, since I stopped going to hear the crazies talk about how
shopping on Sunday causes the drought in Utah and how tattoos are
satanic, I haven't had one Sunday headache. I really like/need the
opportunity to "recharge" before going back to work on Monday.
Recovery from Mormonism - The Mormon Church - www.exmormon.org