Seriously. Not for little eyes at all.

http://community.babycenter.com/post/a47269375/my_husband_says_he_doesnt_like_vaginas

Quite simply, her husband is gay. That's my over-simplified answer, devoid of study and philosophical thought.

Even straight people sometimes dislike vaginas. If the only symptom is lack of sex drive, something like low testosterone could just as easily be the cause.

If you read the entire thread, including her last comments on her conversation with him (presuming he's being honest), he just seems to have a low sex drive/low testosterone and have some hang-up with vaginas (which isn't all that uncommon among sexually repressed men who had limited sexual contact with women prior to marriage - such men tend to have sexual expectations that have no basis in reality and are often disappointed or even disturbed by the reality of sex). He also appears to have pronounced texture issues. He may also be concerned about getting her pregnant.

Sex is uncomplicated, but sexuality is very complicated and men who tend to be both overanalytical and lazy to begin with can really make a mess of things.

I don't know anything about the guy, but assuming he's a typical American working stiff he probably needs to exercise more, eat better, get a little more sleep, reduce mindless TV/internet consumption, and most importantly confront his own mortality and check his goofy phobias. The last point may require counseling.

That Keyser said times infinity.

She needs to stop giving him any sexual affection if he's going to be a total selfish bastard. Sexual intimacy goes BOTH ways, not just pleasure for one party.

What an uptight, self-centered asshat.

She goes on to say that he goes out of his way to make sure she has an O, which she can do without penetration. He also doesn't demand oral and would understand if she didn't want to b/c he doesn't reciprocate.

I think there are some serious issues going on, but I don't know that he's a total jerk.

I still think he's a selfish bastard for not reciprocating with cunninglingus. It's only polite to return the favour, guys. And wash your junk, too. It can be just as funky as an unwashed vajajay.

Then he wouldn't enjoy blowjobs..

I thought this too. I have a friend who's husband may be asexual. He just doesn't care that much about or crave sex. It's not on his radar. If she initiates and they get going he enjoys it, but I think it is more the movement that starts to stir something up. He's not that turned on by foreplay.

As a TBM I never thought there would come a day where I would be advising my kids to have pre-marital sex. This is another example why. Throughout the whole "courting" process one discovers various compatibilities. Sex should be near or at the top of the list.

What is TTC? I feel like I'm missing a big part of the discussion.

TTC = Trying To Conceive

Thank you Vagina Lover. I, too, love vaginas. :)

I wondered that too. What the hell is TTC? Some kind of bishopric meeting?

Maybe she doesn't wash well enough. Just saying it would explain everything she describes.

maybe she should wash hers.

How do you know she doesn't?

Warning, at the bottom, Adult Humour and swearing

Since the 1950s, there's a whole ad campaign designed to make women (and men too) think a natural vagina is dirty, smelly, and disgusting. If you don't believe me, google some vintage Lysol ads; They're terribly disturbing.

The thing is, these products contribute to gynecological problems. All a woman needs is some plain soap, warm water, and 5 minutes. Women have been fed this crap about odor and shame for so long, we think (and men too) there's something wrong with a vagina having any kind of natural smell.

Like Sarah Silverman said in her recent show:

“Just use whatever you wash your asshole with, surely that's strong enough for your 'disgusting' vagina. And if there's still a rancidness, go to the doctor. Don't spray perfume on it, that's what a crazy person would do.”

This comment is just awful, IMO:

"She said it was possible for her gay husband to have sex with a her if sex was done in the doggy position because he did not have to see her face. He could just fantasize about whatever."

I have had friends say they think vaginas are ugly, but that hasn't stopped them having sex with women. Sounds like a bizarre situation and behavior. Definitely need a good counselor. Maybe a sex therapist?

I don't like gall bladders, but I am a big fan of vaginas, and brains.

I don't see any hope for this marriage unless the guy gets over his "dislike" of vaginas. I won't touch you with [actual size here]-inch pole, but you can touch me; and I'm not interested in sex anyway--but I'm not gay, simply isn't going to fly. Monogamy means that each partner is stuck with the other. Therefore, "I don't like your genitals," isn't an option. This is like, I don't like the toilet, I prefer to pee on the floor. Change your preferences. I suspect he won't; and he wouldn't really mind losing the wifey-ifey either.

There do seem to be a lot of mormon mommies on baby center. Is it run by mormons?

EmmaWho Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> There do seem to be a lot of mormon mommies on
> baby center. Is it run by mormons?

No. The crazy tbm posts come from the "LDS" mommy group within babycenter. They have groups for other religions and interests as well.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/23/2014 02:58PM by Tupperwhere.

She should have dumped the bastard on their wedding night.

Here's what I think:

This is the male side of the result of "sex is bad and dirty and dangerous but you should save it for your wife". And it's clearly just as damaging to men as it is to women.

Frankly, I think he's afraid of it. Or he doesn't know quite what to do with it. Admitting to that would be admitting to a weakness, so instead, he re-frames it as a preference issue; sex and vaginas seem dirty to him. That makes him feel better about the situation, but it sure does a number on her body image and self esteem. I think he's a selfish, inconsiderate asshole for not considering how this affects her, especially when she tries to talk to him about it. Typical mormon man, devoid of empathy. It's pitiful.

Having re-read her last response, I suppose I could tone down the previous paragraph a little bit, but I still think it boils down to he's being lazy and selfish and inconsiderate of her feelings and she's doing mental gymnastics to convince herself she's okay with that. If she was really okay with that, she wouldn't have needed to start a thread.

"So I asked him what it is about hand jobs he prefers over sex (specifically asking about tightness of hand vs vagina) and he said that it wasn't a tightness issue, it was that he didn't have to work. He could sit back and enjoy without doing any work."

He's a lazy, selfish dickwad.

If there is anything better than puss-c god is keeping it to himself.

I read the last response too and it occurred to me that if they'd ever shared a bottle of wine with their cuddling, things might have been different. A little alcohol seems to shut off the harsh down-rating self talk.

It has long seemed quite unfair to me that the morg does such a number on young peoples' sexuality and then won't even "allow" them a wine cooler on their wedding night.

He's probably just not attracted to her.