part 1 --> http://exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,853696

some people commented that they watch the conference so they know what they are up "against" (know your enemy, etc) but the funny thing is that they know that nothing really has changed. their tactics are the same.

also, even if their tactics are different, why do you want to be all jumpy about it? unsure they'll convert you back, that's why you have the need to 'defend' yourself?

i don't get it.

you can always just say, 'no thank you. don't come again'. wash, rinse, and repeat.

Maybe you don't understand, many of us here are on a Mission to deconvert others!!! The definition of being "saved" could not more aptly be attributed to any other act than what some of us are attempting to do to mormons. We don't need to defend our position, we need to try and wake people up from the insanity of theirs. So staying on top of it, learning their new tactics, and attempting to successfully counter them, are just a few reasons.

I don't personally, but many have family in the Morg that they certainly want to save. Only then can many shattered relationships ever hope to be rebuilt. Not everyone takes such a stand, many are happy to just walk away. Takes a braver individual in my opinion to stick around and fight.

Sufficient answer?

YES!!!!!!!

you sound you took it personal. don't take it that way because it was not the intention of this post at all; rather to reach a better understanding of the mormon/ex-mormon social dynamics.

the cult has no new tactics. that's my point.
no new techniques, no new stories to tell. in fact, the speeches even sound the same. so most likely you are already prepared to answer any of their questions with ease.


even if they do have new tactics, it would be like learning every 6 months the new sales techniques by kirby to "counter-attack" their vaccum offers when they are at your door.


i think by watching the conference and devoting a substantial amount of your time and energy, that in itself empowers them.

if you want a peace, don't join an anti-war rally. but rather, join a pro-peace campaign.

You sound like you took it *very* personally that some people here watched GC or have the audacity to talk about it. Why does it bother you so much? If it helps others but doesn't help you, do you really need to demand an explanation and insist that people's reasons are not valid and they should just do it your way? If you were following your own advice, wouldn't you just skip those threads the way you are suggesting others just skip viewing GC?

In another post on this thread, you said TSCC has no new tactics. Seriously? You should read what the hens on Babycenter LDS are saying about Jeff Holland's talk. Some of them are convinced he wore the purple tie (I didn't watch it so I'm taking their word for it that he actually wore a purple tie) in support of Mormon Feminist Housewives(MFH). They're even claiming one of the MFH's said Jeff quoted her words in his talk. They feel "sooooo heard." More than one person on that thread who had been doubting said his talk assuaged her doubts and she's back on firm-faith footing. If previously-doubting Mo's dial up the fellowshipping of exMo's because of Holland's talk, it might be a good idea to know what he said.

If you don't suffer the fallout of GC where TheBrethren give their marching orders to the little people, yippee-kie-aye for you! They don't happen to me either, and I didn't watch a second of conference. However, I don't judge other exMo's who did watch, nor do I think I know better than they do what is necessary for them to protect themselves from the fellowshipping antics of their family, friends, and ward members. Why do *you* think you know how they should best handle situations that happen to *them*?

Not only do we talk about it, but we do what we can to let others know what to look for.

We wouldn't wish it on anyone. We try to get information out to anyone and everyone that may have to deal with it in the future.

We tell people how to prevent it, combat it, and come out on the other side in one piece.

We go into the gory details of what it's like to have it, and get rid of it. We talk about the joy of cutting it out of our life.

We do all we can to save our family from the ordeal.

Once you've survived something that literally sucks the life out of you, you can't help but try to warn others how to avoid it.

wouldn't it more productive though, reading about the real and true history of the church, dna research on native americans than listening to boring speeches that haven't changed for the last 50 years?

GC makes you angry maybe, sad, a mix of negative emotions...so why put yourself through that?

and watching conference every 6 months right next to them will get them interested in reading about the real history of the church?

unlikely.

what's next..buy the liahona and ensign so you can de-program other people? sounds counter-productive to me.

my take is a bit too pragmatic maybe.

they come to you "no thank you"
you go to them, you entice them by asking them "where is zarahemla?"

NOT by commenting on monson's speech from last conference.

i'm over it. thank you all for your comments.

I would love to just walk away and leave it all behind. I find the talks grating.

Unfortunately I'm married to a very active member. We've had multiple discussions about the church unfortunately logic is having a hard time finding its way into his brain.

He's a sweet and smart man but it's hard to be around his more TBM self. Yesterday he listened to Holland's talk twice. Apparently there were references to faith and coming back blah blah blah. I think he was hoping that I would hear them and be struck with the truth of those statements.

Instead I just wanted to punch Holland in the face. I kept thinking really they have this guy talking about integrity? What a pompous ass.

Then there's the missionaries that stop by because my husband is going on splits with them last night. That's actually where I heard about the faith bit. I tend to tune them out and stare out the window when they talk, but last night they asked me to talk to someone about the 'gospel' even though I've told them repeatedly that I don't believe in the church and don't wish to discuss it. My response last night was, 'I'll do the church a favor this once, I won't talk to anyone about the 'gospel', because I don't think you'd like what I have to say.'

I got a sideways glance from the elder to my husband, but he shut up.

Right now listening to those men and having their hypocritical nonsense thrown at me is so hard.

Someday I hope I'm strong enough to listen to conference like the others and be able to throw these little quotes that make no sense back at them and ask them to really think about what they are doing.

Until then, I just cringe, as the words, even the sound of the voices, grate against my every nerve

Well said, Mia!

I dont watch it from start to finish. Can stomach it (couldnt when I was active) But I do look forward to hearing them dropping one of their golden piles of sh@% just for the laughs! Another reason is cuz we have family still in the morg & would like to be informed when we talk to e. Can you imagine what its like to see your family Devote every avalible minuet, dime and blood &sweat to something thats nothing more than a multi-level ponzi-scheme! You want to grab em & shake em! I feel SO USED!!!

It's fun to poke at with sticks.

1 It's difficult to ignore a train wreck.

2 Vicarious revenge and catharsis.

By the way, I don't watch GC. I come here and read about other peoples opinion and take on it.

Some people still have to pretend to be tbm and go through the motions for family reasons. So we appreciate the insights they report when they must watch conference for appearance reasons. Each poster brings a different perspective that continues to help me in my journey out. We are on different paths and places in our journey out. Some are beginning, some have completed their journey and most of us are still walking our path.

I can't stand to watch it myself, but I'm glad for other people who do, so I can get a heads up on the tactics my TBM family might try to pull on me next. You can leave the Church, but the Church just can't leave it alone unfortunately.

On many levels, the mormon church is an enigma. Even they will tell you that satan will tell you a thousand truths to get you to believe one lie. Perhaps they are the very satan that they speak of. They teach about Jesus, then threaten to cut your throat from ear to ear when you visit their temples. They talk about the importance of the family while driving families apart in many cases. Most of us who have left, still have memories of good times that involved the church, it's members, and its culture. Too bad it has to be a life-sucking, cult that'll threaten to kill you and demand all of your resources as a matter of routine indoctrination. Perhaps those who are healing need to go back and watch them from a new perspective in order to more fully heal. I turned it on for five minutes this time and all I heard was blah, blah, blah, Jesus, blah, blah, blah, before I turned the channel. I knew that Jesus wasn't the real focus of what they wanted to emulate. He's just their ticket to suck in more unsuspecting suckers who are vulnerable and who don't know better.

Step 1.
Be a TBM for the first half of your life, waste a huge amount of time in callings, and pay a huge amount of money in tithing.

Step 2.
After you figure out that the cult/church is not true, spend the second half of your life as an angry exmo, where you are consumed by the desire to rescue other people from the cult.

By following these two steps, you will totally waste the one and only life you will ever have.

Good work Joseph Smith. You are still wrecking lives 169 years after you met the fate that you so richly deserved.