I'm trying to do some research, and I'd like to know what experiences you might have had with stopping children from swearing. I'm talking about both young and old (little kids up to teenagers).

What methods have you tried, and how did they work? Any success stories?

I don't stop them from swearing. I don't believe that cussing is "bad" so why should I stop them.

I do explain the appropriate context of a word and I explain to them that we don't speak that way at grandparent's houses etc. So I guess I do stop them from cussing inappropriately. They're preschoolers with strong emotions to express, sometimes a cuss fits the bill like nothing else. We don't say Fcuk or c*nt etc because those sorts of words are too adult for kids to say. And insulting siblings is not allowed.

The other day my son couldn't get a hotwheels car at the store because it was way overpriced. When my husband explained that we couldnt buy the car because the store was charging too much my son exclaimed, "That's bullshit!" We didnt stop him, he's right. I think cuss words have a valid place in our language, it's just important to use them in the appropriate context and company.

So I suppose I would help a kid stop cussing by appealing to his sense of reason and giving him a valid explanation of why he shouldnt say that word or phrase.

Also offering other words that could better express what the cusser is feeling

southern Wrote:
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> The other day my son couldn't get a hotwheels car
> at the store because it was way overpriced. When
> my husband explained that we couldnt buy the car
> because the store was charging too much my son
> exclaimed, "That's bullshit!" We didnt stop him,
> he's right. I think cuss words have a valid place
> in our language, it's just important to use them
> in the appropriate context and company.


Love.This.

I've heard of parents who fine the kids $1 each time they use a swear word. Usually there's an agreement between the parent(s) and kid(s) that goes both ways so everyone has to live by the same rules.

Years ago, I knew some people that had their kids eat a small sliver of soap as punishment for swearing or using 'bad words.'

Yay!!! I was going to say that my son does, it's not a big deal to me, but I thought people would judge.

Mine swears here and there, never in public and never at school. He knows it's not considered acceptable.

But it's no biggie to me...if that's the worst he does, I'll be ecstatic!

(I'm a neverMo, by the way.)

I say things like "snickerdoodle!" and my grandchildren imitate that. I have one grandson with ADHD (although he's close to be old enough that I'm not going to flip if he swears unless he's around his younger cousins), one with classic autism and one with developmental delays. So I try to err on the side of caution with all three of them since I'm not confident they "get" when it's okay and when it isn't.

How about when a very young kid drops the F-bomb, when he doesn't even know what it means? He's heard it from other kids at school or from the friends of an older sibling.

Ragnar Wrote:
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> How about when a very young kid drops the F-bomb,
> when he doesn't even know what it means? He's
> heard it from other kids at school or from the
> friends of an older sibling.


Then you explain, in age-appropriate terms, that this word is considered vulgar and that we do not use it in polite company.

I was only able to make them stop swearing in front of me. lol

Especially if it's a young child. Sometimes they just like seeing how people react when they use those words.

Simply explain that it's not polite to use that word in everyday language and correct every time he or she uses it. Don't get mad, shocked, or upset. If you have to laugh, walk away.

Yup! What Itz said.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/29/2013 04:17PM by charpop705.

My son was really into swearing when he was 6 or 7. He loves to get a reaction out of people, so my best strategy was to ignore it. If I would get all mad about it and yell and carry on, it would actually encourage him to say those words even more.

We have always talked a lot about words and their meanings (I'm a speech-language pathologist.) So we've talked about how there are several words for the same thing, and how you might choose which one to use in different contexts (at home, at school, at grandma's house, talking to a kid, talking to an adult, etc.)

We never really outlawed any specific words, just explained when and where they would be a good choice. For my kid, knowing that a word is acceptable (at least some of the time) makes it a lot less exciting to say than knowing that it is a totally forbidden word.

We do have a rule against name-calling, which covers the derogatory terms for various groups of people. We have talked about what those words mean and why they are hurtful. He hasn't really been interested in saying any of those words.

My kids are adults now. I don't recall having much of a problem with them swearing. I think they mostly did it with their friends.

I probably swear more than they do. Especially my daughter. She doesn't like it if I swear. When she has kids i'll really have to clean it up.

As a kid being told I was not allowed to swear, it just made me swear more. I just made sure not to do it around them. I swore like crazy around friends and at school.

Some people say swearing has become too commonplace and that it's a sign of a declining society. I think it's a sign of society becoming less uptight, and a sign of the swear words losing their power. I think that's a good thing. After all, words have only the meaning and power we agree to give them. Someone had to decide certain words were taboo. If that can be decided, then it can be undecided. We've done it before. There are all sorts of words that used to be considered obscene. Now they're just words.

And why is it synonyms and euphemisms that mean exactly the same thing are okay? We're talking about the same thing just using different words. Why can I get away with saying copulate, feces and sphincter? Because they're clinical?

Maybe it's because I've been out of the eager-to-be-offended culture of Mormonism quite a while, but it doesn't bother me if someone says to me, "F#*k you, you motherf#*%ing piece of sh!t! Go f#*k yourself in the @ss!" I'd only want to know why she's mad, because that's where the problem is, not in her choice of words.

Now let's all go to YouTube and watch some George Carlin.

Here's my take on the synonyms and euphemisms--we have lots of words in our language that have synonyms, not just the words for body parts and their functions (although they definitely have more). Choosing one word over another can give your speech or writing more personality and character.

I don't see anything wrong with using different words for my body parts when speaking to my gynecologist vs. talking dirty to my husband, for example. I really don't want to set the same mood in both of those interactions.

My wife's mother taught her kids that "butt" is a swear word. She said it was offensive and was never to be uttered. As a result, my wife today can't stand that word.

My DIL was brought up to think "boob" was a swear word, she still can't handle hearing it in conversation, but she says "butt" all the time.

It is amazing how words are words and depending on what we are taught in childhood as being evil or forbidden is all just about upbringing. You could teach your young children that the word arm is evil, and they would have trouble hearing it uttered into their adult lives.

It's all about what we decide is forbidden as to what words carry power.

I didn't stop them from swearing because I swear. I only taught them where and when it's appropriate to swear. They didn't say "Oh God" or swear around their TBM grandparents or around religious friends (Mormons and those of other faiths). They didn't swear at school. They could swear in almost almost every other setting and especially at home. The only one forbidden: F-word (just don't like it; never have).

I told my kids that swearing will get you in trouble in certain contexts - school, in front of grandparents, etc., and that they should understand what words are appropriate in any given situation.
I've also told them swearing is like having a driver's license - you have to be old enough to use it even if you have the general idea.

letting go of the illusion that you can control what they say might help a bit. Im sure the power they feel in being able to agitate you is a factor in why they choose those words. Helping them understand why it may not be a good idea is a lot more effective than trying to us control.

Usually I just say "language" or "watch the mouth." It's just a reminder that they're overdoing it and it's getting a little out of control. They "clean cuss," for the most part which I still think sounds bad and some of the words sound the same as "real" cussing. I don't really have a problem with cuss words, and I swear, but certainly we've had a few talks about appropriate use and it can be rather unbecoming. So far the language is contained to when they're playing video games mostly. I haven't heard much of the language outside of that. Age group - early teens, but this has been going on for years.

By making swearing passe.

Translation

Hey kid will you pass the fucking gravy.

Jesus Christ kid you got a fucking A, let's get shitfaced on ice cream to celebrate.


I think you get the point. My BIL who is a Stake President told my wife once that he has desensitized his kids to things like swearing, violence, and sex on purpose. He said that creating a stigma around those makes them more powerful.

LOL they won't stop swearing, hip-hop music is too ingrained in our culture by now.
You simply have to teach them there is a time and place for everything.

Our Grandpa, a Southerner, taught all the boys that you don't swear in church or whenever ladies are present.
But you can swear around other men. LOL.

So one four year old in our family got so tired of being polite at a wedding, he tucked at grandpa's suit and said "Please, grandpa, let's go outside and talk son-of-a-bitch".