Most of you know that I'm a nevermo, right. I'm an ex-Crazy-Jesus-Camp Let's-Bring-on-Armageddon SAVED! fundamentalist Christian. In the language of my cult, we said things like, "Ayche-ee-double-hockey-sticks!" "Sugar, Honey, Icedtea!" and I got whacked if I said, "stuff," but that's another story.

Anyway, back in 1999, a friend of mine told me that she saw a girl on America's Most Wanted or whatever that singing show with Simon Cowbell and his see-through shirts and rude 'tude shout, "Shut the front door!", and my friend was like, "I knew right then she was a Mormon." (Said friend is the oldest of 11 and hails from Eye-dee-ho.)

Anyway, how do you curse in Mormon?

First time I ever heard Shut the front door was when I heard Stacy London say it on "What Not to Wear". Never heard it before that. But I don't live in Utah or Idaho, so it is very different, I guess.

Now, when I went to college (Ricks) I heard "Oh, my heck" for the first time. I teased people to no end over that. And never, EVER said it.

I have always had a potty mouth and have always said the real thing. haha!

Are you making fun of Mormons?

Ewe!

Fer ignernt!

(Sorry, I'm saving the really choice ones for my book).

Okay, one more: How does a Mormon say "F**k you"?

'Preciate cha!

Hahahahahaha!

;o)

When I went to Ricks there was plenty of cursing on our dorm floor...one guy in particular would greet me with "fuck off Big Ron", to which I'd reply "fuck off Gary"...but there were 1 half dozen guys who said every phony Mormon curse word in the book....and they all sounded so GD stupid!

Ron Burr

You guys are so flippin ignorant! Boner.

"flippin" makes my skin crawl....

Ron Burr

Shut the heck up...is classic in my time. Freakin wierd/messed up..also classic. Bitty-b, too. But this was in the 90's and a crazy era to say the least.

What a load of SHIZ!

If I want to cuss I will. People would think you have a low IQ using words to purposely replace cuss words. Especially all the time.

What the flip!

You cotton-picken' idiots are giving me BYU-flashbacks!

As a presently being-shunned ex-Mormon, the nastiest, two-faced, disrespectful comment is their newest one, that the missionaries all use, when I tell them that I will not talk to them, and that most members say when I tell them to leave my grandchildren alone:

"Have a nice day."

They give a nasty smile, with glaring crazy-eyes, and say it like a curse. "Have a nice day" is the Mormon equivalent of "Fu-k off."

Mormons are allowed to give you the finger, but only while driving.

While a missionary, I picked up "fetch" (as in "Holy Fetch!", not "I fetched this really hot chick I met through craigslist last night.") from an Aussie companion.

Oh my heck, Beth. Zap and zounds, dadgummit. Horse hockey is what it is. Them's dirty words for dirty thoughts.

"Zounds" was actually a strong curse word in Shakespeare's day. It was pronounced "zoonds" and originated as a contraction of "Christ's wounds."

When I was about 9, 2-3 years moron, my nevermo grandma said, *Oh SH!T*.

With my jaw hanging about floor level, my mother looked at me & just said, *Well, where did you think I learned it?*!!!

Good times.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 10/15/2014 03:39AM by aquarius.

Did she actually say it with the exclamation mark in it, or are you just dodging the filter? :P

My personal favorite is "mother of pearl..."

At her retirement party I said now it would be OK to tell everyone what her word was.

She looked bewildered and said, "My Word is my word."

Pay Lay Alol

"Good night!" was popular in my mission when i started. I did my very best to ridicule anyone who said it. By the end, nobody was saying it. :)

i think what I hate about mormon 'swearing' is that they have to come up with something cutesy that doesn't make sense and is not in the mainstream of other cussing euphemisms. most of them don't make sense to me. So many non swearing people I know say 'SUGAR!' instead of the bad S word. Mormons don't like to do that because it somehow demonstrates they would rather be saying the forbiddenword so they come up with 'oh my heck!' Which is a ridiculous phrase because it is not like people go around saying 'oh my hell!'

Got dandruff and some of it itches!

My sister and dad now say "What the dump?"
I don't even know where this came from.. No one said it when I was growing up, so it must be a new mormon thing?

Son-of-a-pitch! Heard my granddaughters TBM friend say that.

Scum sucking pigs!

Piss up a rope!

Hey we said 'piss up a rope' (as in 'You can go piss up a rope') in the Army. It's valid.

Beth Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
Simon Cowbell and
> his see-through shirts and rude 'tude shout, "Shut
> the front door!", and my friend was like, "I knew
> right then she was a Mormon."

I've never heard the "Shut the Front Door" ever.

I have heard the replacable curse words like:
Freaking
Fetch
Flip
Heck
Cheeze and Rice

Son-of-a-biscuit
Flip
Fetch
Shoot
Holy Hannah :)
Dang :)
Oh Crap :)
Son-of-a-Nutcracker :)
Oh my Heck :)
Oh my hell-o

There is a smiley next to the ones I still use.

Don't judge me!

My BIL says "bullcrap" which annoys the hell out of me. It's either bull, or it's crap, or it's bullsh#t. Not bull crap.

Yeah another one I hear is "shiz".

"Oh my heck" makes me want to stab someone, but luckily we don't hear that out here, I think it's a Utah thing.

So, does "shut the front door" mean you can come in the "back door?"

(Nudge nudge, wink wink)

I was never good at Mormon cussing. I came from a Navy background and the term "cuss like a sailor" was well earned over time. So I had a tendency to fall into what I call "Navy-speak" whenever I feel the need to really, really let go. My best man when I married was a RM and we went fishing one night. I started using some colorful language when a fish got off the hook. I realized what I was saying and apologized wherein he said Brigham Young was noted for using the same sort of language so we both sounded off with "Brother Brigham speak" for the rest of our fishing trip.

I got my mouth from my Dad, may he RIP. He never really let the fbomb drop but was very liberal with his GD's, sh*t, and d**n. Never did get into the mormonized versions. There's only one thing I say that's not 'normal' swearing. I changed the phrase son of a b**h to son of a monkey f**ker. Never was a fan of the B word.

so many *'s i d*n't know wh*t the f*ch you are saying.

Shii-take mushrooms!!