So my wife is the young women's president in our ward. She and I are not believing members but she enjoys the social aspect. The ward is clueless as to what we believe.

Anyway, last night the stake young women's president (her hubby is the 2nd counselor in our ward) texts my wife asking if she can drop some papers off. It was just after 10pm, I'm a law student in finals and my wife is pregnant, plus we have a toddler. My wife was already in bed, read the text and said "I'm in bed, besides it is to late that is just rude to message this late for church". I agreed naturally.
She ignored the text and that was that.
Ten minutes later somebody knocked on the door. Surprise! It's the stake young women's pres. I answered the for with ak of irritated confusion. " are you still up? " she asks. I'm thinking no shit sherlock I answered the door! I responded with "my wife and daughter are asleep and I'm studying for a final in the morning. What do you want?"
"Oh, I sent your wife a text asking if I could swing by and drop some papers off--"
"Did she respond?!"
"Well no, but I needed to get them to her tonight so--"
"So you decided to come and knock on our door uninvited after 10:15?! For the record that is extremely rude and I don't want you to come over for church business after 9pm uninvited in the future."
Then I took the papers and shut the door. Seriously?! You don't get a response after asking if thou can come over on church business after 10 pm so you just show up anyways?!!! I hope she complained to her husband so he calls me on to chat about it, because let's just say that will be a very entertaining discussion.

Well, this a part of the "social aspect".

To remain in such an organization you may need to confront the notion you are masochists.

people are people, be patient, but you did the right thing.

When mormon, one should always have an open door policy 24/7. If not, be prepared to have it any way. Be sure to make a comfy hiding spot in the closet.

It's all about boundaries.
One day my mom (a convert who never really understood mormon culture) received a call from a ward member who said her VT partner was out and could my mother sub with her. My mom replied that she could not since she had a splitting headache. The woman who called got huffy and said, "I would NEVER let a headache get in the way of my visit teaching."
My mom never did really get the rules. When I once mentioned to her that the prophet was encouraging women to have as many children as possible (a long time ago), she got teed off and said, "I'm not going to let someone else tell me how many children to have!" My dad looked at me at the time, and said, "She doesn't get it." No, she never did. She had BOUNDARIES.

I bet she didn't learn anything from this and she'll do it again.

Wow. Totally unacceptable behavior. It's really rude to call or show up that late unless it is an emergency - which it clearly was NOT.

But then, after getting no response to the text, which SHOULD have clued the woman in that you are not receiving at that hour, she comes clomping over there to drop off papers?! Really? Why did they have to be delivered that night? If your wife had already gone to bed and wasn't responding to texts, why on earth would she need those papers? The whole thing is crazy.

Many mormons do not even know what the words arrogance and boundary are because the church teaches the members that whatever it is the church wants, the church is entitled to and gets. Plus, the sky is the limit in the lengths and means the church can use to reach its goals.

Members, in my opinion, learn this lesson all too well. Common sense takes a back seat and members soon learn to ignore it.

When I first started attending the mormon church full time, I was a university student. It didn't take me long to realize that there were quite a few members who seemed to think they knew better than me what I could fit into my schedule - and church always took the first seat. Up until this time, I had been master of my own ship and I was not about to let this change.

After this, the boundary issue was always rearing its head. This definitely was one of the first issues that started me thinking why exactly it was that I had decided to take the path of a temple marriage and an active mormon.

Your wife and baby needed peace and quiet for sleeping and you needed to study.

Papers can wait.

Thanks folks. Apparently she had to drop them off that night because they are the permission forms for winter youth conference and they are due Sunday. Since she forgot to bring them before now, and she is leaving in the morning, she had the right to be a complete moron about social protocols

She could have left them in an envelope on the doorstep... and texted your wife that she was going to do that.
Of course, I'm from a relatively small city, where you can leave things around and not worry about them wandering off :)

Or e-mailed the form for the ward to print off.

Ohhhh! You just messed up her entire little vacay she just left on! Good job!

whether or not your wife still attends or not. This lady's actions were unacceptable.

in 'the gospel', anything "that supports the church (aka gospel) is OK.


got it.

There are NO boundaries in a cult.

Period.

End of story.

Put your shoulder to the wheel push along, do your duty with a heart full of song, we all have work let NO ONE SHIRK! put your shoulder to the wheel.

30/40 years of singing this clap trap breaks some peoples minds.

I would have left her rotting on the porch and not answered the door. And if the moron kept ringing the bell and banging on the door, I would have called the police and had the slut physically removed from the property.

You non-believing but still attending people add so much fun to the forum! I HOPE he does call and you return and report!

+1 What verilyverily said. This used to happen to me all the time.

I think this behavior is indicative of the cult, in general. The person at the top puts pressure on someone below them in the hierarchy, who puts pressure on the person below them, and so on, on down to the woman delivering papers late at night. The lack of respect for each other, the judgments, the despair, all just builds, as it is thrust upon one member to another. I was never treated more horribly than I was by members of my own ward, when I was still a Mormon. After I left, all of shunning and gossiping was a relief, compared to the unhappiness of being part of that cult.

Some Mormon was giving that woman an anxiety attack, and she was stressed out of her mind. She was made to act crazy. I've been there. Not that I excuse her, or any of the others. Understand that you and your wife are members of "crazy," so that's what you can expect for the rest of your lives and your children's lives and their children's lives. Set firm boundaries, and take charge of your OWN behavior. You opened the door.