Date: March 28, 2011 10:28AM
..someone stated that the church outlaws oral sex. That's not exactly right. In January 1982, Ol' Spence wrote a letter to Stake Presidents that stated, basically, that the first presidency had decided that oral sex as an "unwholesome and impure practice". Well, that started a shit-storm because some bishops and SP's started asking that in worthiness interview. Rut roh, said Spence and the boys.
Here's the link to the letter (see, specifically, page 2):http://www.lds-mormon.com/worthy_letter.shtml
The following was posted by "Nick" on RfM about 7 years ago and he says it better than I ever could:
The First Presidency sent a letter (copies of it are available on the web) to Bishops and Stake Presidents (not intended for distribution to the membership at large), including the statement that they (the FP) viewed oral sex as an unnatural, unholy practice.
Several months later, the FP sent out another letter (according to several accounts, though copies of it don't seem to be nearly as readily available), which did not mention oral sex directly, but stated that Bishops and SPs should not ask about specific sexual practices in Temple Recommend interviews — indeed, even if members asked about specific sexual practices between married couples, the interviewer should not weigh in with an official pronouncement as to whether those practices are right/allowed/tolerated/etc. Whatever the truth about this second letter, the current TR guidelines state that the only sexually-oriented question that should be asked is whether the interviewee is "living the Law of Chastity".
This second letter is viewed as a tactical retreat from the hard line, without actually retracting the earlier letter (since oral sex is not mentioned explicitly).
Of course, the church is lousy with Bishops and SPs who believe it is their divine duty (as well as a way to earn more Celestial Kingdom points) to hold their flocks to a higher standard than the membership at large; also there are undoubtedly plenty (just as there are in other faiths) who get vicarious thrills from knowing the details of the sexual lives of those in their charge. So, there continue to be reports of Bishops and SPs asking about (and/or condemning) oral sex in TR interviews, priesthood talks, etc.
Further, because the Mormon culture at large operates largely in absence of official doctrine, rumors are a major factor in how its members view oral sex and other sexual practices (besides masturbation, which continues to be condemned at every opportunity). Countless Mormons "know" that oral sex is wrong, because they heard it from their RS/priesthood friends/family/etc. — even if they have never heard any sort of official pronouncement on the subject from a Bishop or Stake President.