We left tscc a few years ago. Over the years our social circle has gotten smaller and smaller as the relationships with our TBM family & friends have ended. It's down to DH, I & our kids. Almost all of our close relationships were with Mormons who didn't take the news of us leaving tscc well. So I need to broaden my social circle but I have never had to deliberately try to do this before. Not even sure where to start. Any advice?

Here's the thing about TSCC: it provides a ready-made (but rather shallow) "social life" for you.
No effort required. Just show up at church -- voila, you have "friends." Of course, they're only your "friends" if you pay, pray, and obey, otherwise they'll shun you like yesterday's garbage...but still, there they are.

Once you get out, that ready-made, no-effort social group is gone. Now it's up to you to make the effort. You've already figured this out...but never having done it before, you're at a loss as to HOW to do it.

For me, the solution was simple: just go do things you love to do. You'll find other people who love the same things doing them too -- introduce yourself, have a cup of coffee with them, see if they want to get together to do the thing you love again. Many will. Before long, you'll have new friends. They'll introduce you to other people...and the ball will start rolling.

For me (I was newly returned from a mission, and in college), I was into building computers (this was back when more people built them than bought them!). So I found advertised on my college bulletin board a "home-brew computer club." I went. Met a couple of guys I liked. We started hanging out. They introduced me to other people (including -- gasp! -- girls). I went from all alone as an ex-mo at a new school to having a robust and supportive social group in about 6 months. And it was wonderful! These were people who did interesting things, and wanted me to be part of doing them because they liked me -- not because the bishop told them to be nice to me.

So...what do you love to do, you and your DH? Cooking? Sign up for a couples cooking class, you'll meet other couples! Hiking? See if there's a local hiking group. Bowling, golf, scrapbooking, whatever -- go join a group that does something you love, and meet new people.

It's really fun. I promise :)

What Hie says... its very simple. Just do what you love to do.

It will all come together for you.

For me that would depend on whether you live in the Morridor or outside of it.

If surrounded by Mormons you would need to be more pro-active in engineering your life and surroundings to be of your choosing without the added encumbrance of Mormon clingings.

My never Mo grandmother spent her adult life in the Morridor, and managed to forge a life for herself despite being surrounded by Mormons. She had an active social life, held a job, had talents, interests and hobbies to occupy her time. And many friendships she maintained for years and years.

She wasn't really an extrovert. She was able to invent herself and make a life there despite being in the minority.

Her friends weren't LDS, but were good people in the area who were neighborly and looked out for each other. Grandma was a natural at doing that; maybe because she was never a Mormon so didn't have that as an obstacle to be overcome?

Stay busy at doing what matters to you.

I enjoy being alone so haven't really missed the fake friendships I once knew as a Mormon. My time is my own, and I am my own person. I try to cherish every moment there is, because life is short and I don't want it to pass me by.

There's so much to be involved with on a community level that when you want to do something or get involved somewhere you shouldn't have difficulty finding some interest that appeals to you. Become a volunteer? Find a p/t job? Learn more about your neighbors around you as you have more time to get involved. Take up a new hobby. Travel.

This is what i have been doing, i found card tournaments and been playing cards with authentic people to force me out of my shell and be authentic myself.

This is not so much sharing advice, but sharing what I experienced. I went through a period that was isolating, and mournful. Whether or not that was necessary, I don't know--but I did have a lot of internal healing to do, and come to terms with who I was outside of Mormon definitions.

I'm an introvert, and don't need a crowd, but thought it was important to start reengaging socially--despite the risks (those are always there). At first, this is not easy, because when I would introduce myself typical questions raised Mormon stuff. Where did you go to college? etc.

I went back to playing soccer in an adult rec. league, and joined a very different kind of church. I met people that I never would have as a Mormon, and had a lot of fun.

Those may not be your things, but I think it was important to me to find places where I belonged.

Think Snowball has expressed it well. Start with one thing— sport, volunteer, hobby, backto school, etc.
Sometimes you just need some quiet time to yourself. Sometimes it is good to do nothing and just think, and stretch your mind.
It is different for everyone.
Best to you all.