We had just finished are favorite t.v. show and as I was taking out some trash around 8PM I see two people on my porch. They rang my bell. I thought about my daughter and how so soon she will be knocking on stranger's doors with a list of members wanting to burn some Jesus time.

I let them in.

They looked like they were 16. Neither of them were 20 yet - one almost.

One from SLC area and one from Southern Idaho. They were awkward and young and my daughter thought the one from SLC was cute. He was in a David Archuleta way.

We exchanged all the informational niceties in the entry and then I invited them up to the living room. They were clueless about life. My wife asked bout their college prospects. One says he wants to go to a Utah state school and the other wants to get his generals with BYU's Pathways like his sister did. This was the Idahoan who was homeschooled. He was a complete socially awkward mess. Pathways to more social awkwardness as an adult? Poor kid.

He used his iPad Mini to show us the new Jesus Easter vid and asked us what we thought of it. I told him I like the music. We all were noncommittal probably because we couldn't hardly see it.

Anyway the end was the kicker. They both bore their testimonies and then the socially awkward senior comp asked me directly who I would like to say the prayer. I said that they were talking t the wrong person and they needed to ask my wife. She picked one of them.

It was sad to me. We burned a half hour of our time entertaining these teenagers in their efforts to find people for Jesus. I thought back to my pathetic efforts in the 90s doing this same thing as a 20 something. I was little older due to my "sins."

Stray human animals wondering around looking for things to do. They offered to do anything we wanted around the house even washing our cars. Dang. One would think a billion dollar corporation could find something productive for these kids to do?

Boy, what a revelation.

And your daughter still sees a mission in her future?

Did she by any chance arrange their visit?

It is sad to watch young men and women acting as door-to-door salespeople for any cult. Misguided youth.

She didn't. They come by and try my door at least twice per month. My wife has a rule she lived by as a missionary - call first or no door opens.

Missionaries have only called first a couple of times and that was years and years ago.

I don't know if everyone has a phone in Central America?



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/19/2018 02:54PM by Elder Berry.

I'm surprised you let them run the agenda.

Me, I would have started out with something like, "OK, I know more about your church than you do, and your ill-informed testimonkeys don't impress me, so...how about we watch a TV show you don't get to see as missionaries? Or a movie? Kick back, relax, have some popcorn, turn off the missionary facade for a bit. I was a missionary, I know what it's like. Whaddya say?"

If they stay in mishie mode, I'd give them something to eat and send them on their way.

If they relaxed, I'd let them enjoy the evening.

:)

I so wish I could have but I was bookended by two believing Mormons.

Edit: to be honest I was kinda curious on what they would do. They probably know I'm an endowed but not holding a current recommend inactive and that my wife and daughter are active.

And it was almost like it was scripted. They were nervous and uncomfortable just "sharing a message."

I could have scrambled their minds with information but I just felt sorry for them and embarrassing them would have drawn my family's ire. There is no getting through to guileless young ignorance.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/19/2018 02:59PM by Elder Berry.

Your fly was open????

I was in my pajamas.

Elder Berry Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> And it was almost like it was scripted.

Not almost. It was scripted. Even though they no longer give the format, entirely-memorized "lessons," they still learn a script to run through.

> There is no getting through to guileless
> young ignorance.

Ah, but there is. People got through to me on my mission. Kind people who treated me nicely, while letting me know the stuff I was teaching was nonsense. It got through :)

ificouldhietokolob Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> It got through :)


I might get my car washed.

You’re a good man Elder Berry! Yeah, I know, I’m a wanker and shouldn’t say such things, but someone has to say it!

Misguided kids, lonely kids, self-aggrandizing kids, wankering kids, horny kids, silly kids, Dawg-loving kids, noisy kids, snarky kids, stupid kids, cuddly kids, smart-as-Hie kids—they’re kids living out their parents’ fantasies.

Do what Hie does, ask them to come over in jeans and t-shirts to help with yard work. Who knows, you may find that you like the little wankers!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/20/2018 03:03AM by BYU Boner.

Good idea. I might get my car washed.

"They offered to do anything we wanted around the house even washing our cars"

Do they also fix lawn mowers?

I'm sure they would.

BYU Boner Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> You’re a good man Elder Berry! Yeah, I know,
> I’m a wanker and shouldn’t say such things,
> but someone has to say it!
>
> Misguided kids, lonely kids, self-aggrandizing
> kids, wankering kids, horny kids, silly kids,
> Dawg-loving kids, noisy kids, snarky kids, stupid
> kids, cuddly kids, smart-as-Hie kids—they’re
> kids living out their parents’ fantasies.
>
> Do what Hie does, ask them to come over in jeans
> and t-shirts to help with yard work. Who knows,
> you may find that you like the little wankers!

What about badass kids?

Yup I’d do anything that might improve that dismal I’m wasting my life feeling too...had the little nippers by a couple months ago...sad homesick little puppies...I’d guess one was homeschooled...traveled in threes...chit chat paddy whack give. The dog a bone...jumped in their car and rolled on home...gave em sixty bucks for food the next day...they were ecstatic...will make a fine faith promoting story when they get home...it was a dark night...our money for the month was gone...and jeebus touched a grizzled old apostates heart to buy us lunch..naw...just treating kids the way I’d like mine treated if they were gullible enough to be on the lards errand...seems jeebus doesn’t pay much and will never spring for lunch...cheapbugger

They do look like they are getting younger and younger. They walk around looking like slaves in this town, they ask if they can do something for you every single time, told them once to get my tithing back. Their social skills are so bad that they make me look like an all-star speaker and that's pretty bad. People here know how bad i am with words and talking. Multiply me by like a million and thats how awkward they all are. Most times they have no clue what they are even teaching or what their gospel actually is. They are just out there because of pressures.