For the past few months, my husband,some of our family, and myself have been seriously considering resigning from the church. I've been reluctant because I superstitiously think bad will come of it, and yet, I feel the need to do so. Just need a little boost of encouragement from you all. Is there a particular way that a letter needs to be worded? Also, I think sending it to headquarters via registered mail would be the most effective. Thanks in advance for your advice and encouragement.

Here's my words of encouragement: You Can Do It!

Listening to your intuition is usually a good thing, so, if you have been "feeling the need", you probably should resign.

Any way you inform the corporation is good, but, personally, I did the registered mail route. It worked. And life has been so much happier since then.

Here's how to do it, summed up nice and neat (Thanks to the admins of this site). It's as simple as sending an email, which is how I resigned several years ago.

https://www.exmormon.org/remove.htm

Keep in mind this important section which is often forgotten or missed:

"Remember:

"If you've said in your letter that it is your formal resignation from the church and that it is effective immediately, you become a non-member the minute they receive your letter. All the rest is just them jumping through their own hoops. You don't have to go to any interviews or invite anyone into your house, nor do you need to have a telephone conversation with anyone about your resignation. YOU get to choose whether you talk to them if they call or appear at your house."

Resigning can be difficult. The church was a major part of my life up until I realized the truth. My parents are still deeply embedded in it and it still has lasting consequences in my life, most of which I'm working to overcome.

Also, keep in mind that should anything "bad" happen after you resign, it's not due to your resignation. That's just not how life works. Sometimes bad things happen, sometimes good things happen. If you're worried about bad things happening, then it's easy to "find" them and use them as a "sign" that you should or shouldn't have done a thing. Don't go looking for problems.

Leaving the church is a positive. You are removing a weight off your shoulders and saying "No" to an abusive, harmful organization that sees you more as a resource for them, than how they can help you.

Walk away and never look back. Good luck!

I did the registered mail route as well over a decade ago. They tried to refer it to the local level and I balked no way was I going to do that. The local lay people were the reason we were resigning when we did.

So we went straight through Temple Square before there was an Internet e-mail. I hadn't known of RfM back in the day either (wish I had it would've made my life easier!)

Once the mail was received, after a waiting period we received our resignations via mail. It was official. We were out. Although from what I've read here, you're out from the moment they receive your request.

They will hold onto your records and follow [us] until death, so we'll be dead dunked posthumously after we're gone. I find that horrendous and offensive on its face. There really ought to be a law prohibiting that. Maybe there will be in our lifetime, one can hope.

For more details on how to do it (and discussion about the emotional effects) see

"Leaving the Mormon Church: How To Get out" at http://packham.n4m.org/leaving.htm

I did it about two years ago. I followed this websites

instructions. Two weeks later I got my confirmation letter

that I was no longer a member.

Its no big deal to resign and it doesn't take long.

Just do it. Its easy. I'm so glad I did.

Thanks you guys; you're giving me the courage to do it.

Never underestimate the power of a positive example.

My good ex-mo friend left TSCC almost 20 years ago, along with his wife and their children. They formally resigned a few years later.

They continued to live happily in their uber Mormon Utah County neighborhood.

TEN years after he left, a neighbor stopped by to ask him about resigning from TSCC. Turns out the neighbor and family had wanted to leave at about the same time as my friend. But they listened to all the dooms-day predictions about what happens to people who leave. The neighbor had been observing my friend's family live happily, waiting for terrible predictions to come to pass and finally realizing it was bunk had gotten up the courage to leave.

Everyone must do it in their own time and way, but think of the lost time (and money) wasted participating in a religion they no longer believed.

Think your children and their children who will live unburdened by the TSCC because you have courage to leave.

Best wishes!

I was relieved and walking on air for months after I officially left. I've never heard of bad happening due to resignation.

I say go for it! Then let us know how you feel and if your life is better.

Then, by all means, let me encourage you. You should do this.

I was a member for 23 years. Served in a Branch Presidency for 9 of those years. Was a veil worker for a time. Sealed in the temple to wife, etc.

The church is not true. It took me a long time to discover, and it was a painful process. But it's a fact.

And it's not a neutral thing, either. The church is a bad influence on its members. Women are second class, no doubt about it. They have to live their lives pretty much expecting that, in the Celestial Kingdom, they'll have to end up sharing their husband with other wives. How is having to think this all your life "good" for you.

They teach you over and over NOT to think for yourselves. Not to trust your own judgement. Not to explore materials "outside" the church. Etc.

They expect SO much of your time to be given to POINTLESS meetings and other activities.

Worst of all, it is built on lies. They started with Joseph, but then the lies just kept coming. Lie on top of lie. You can't build a good organization on a foundation of lies.

I don't care if they have good family values. Anyone can have good family values. The church does not have a copyright on these things.

You are doing the right thing. If you cherish truth wherever it may lead, then you are doing the right thing.

My best to you!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/23/2018 03:07PM by mormonrealitycheck.

Quit mormon is the way to go. It was easy enough for me to use and i might be the dumbest guy on the board. Very little questions asked after getting it done. Resigning was like removing a parasite from my brain finally but i am still healing from the parasites damage.

It was this website that taught me I could do it, and how it was done. I've seldom been that grateful. It's time to allow your superstitions to run in the other direction. Just remember never to involve your local leaders. You work directly at church level.

cludgie Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> It was this website that taught me I could do it,
> and how it was done. I've seldom been that
> grateful. It's time to allow your superstitions to
> run in the other direction. Just remember never to
> involve your local leaders. You work directly at
> church level.

Agreed, keep local leaders out of it all together. You don't have to be caught in those conversations to get out. The fear is powerful trust me i know.

Hi-Ja-To—ho-ho, Brunnhilde! I didn't expect anything bad to happen when I resigned, but I had a very uneasy feeling about it. For a portion of my life, I defined who I was by being a Mormon. That was going to be permanently over.

Once I got my official exit letter (two lines on letterhead received 10 days after I submitted my resignation), I started feeling better about my decision to resign.

The only downside is that I live in a very predominate Utah LDS neighborhood. My neighbors are polite, but I’m definitely persona non grata—even the missionaries don't stop to chat when I’m outside. Too bad for them, I’m actually a nice (if imperfect) man. (((Hugs)))

Abusers convince their victims that they can't survive on their own.

You can survive and thrive! Walk out that door!

The advice here on resignation is spot on. I was in the same boat 5 years ago as a former Bishop and HC member in my history. Lost my family in the process but gained my life!!!

Nothing bad will happen outside of some strained relationships. As has been stated by summer.....you can survive and thrive.

Send it registered mail and move on out of the shadow of your abuser, the LDS church.

I'd been out for decades before I formally resigned. I didn't really feel the need to do it. And then they came out with their evil policy against children of gay parents and I suddenly felt the need to resign and let them know it.

I used the email method posted on this site and I got no interference from local leaders. I simply got a letter in the mail letting me know it was done.

Easy-peasy. Life is good!

I (and my children with me) didn't begin to really recover, until I resigned.

I would recommend writing a letter. There's no format to follow--and I would NOT give them the privilege of telling you how to write your resignation letter!

I wrote a letter that stated EXCACLY WHY my children and I were resigning from the Mormon cult. I gave examples of their conflicting history, from my ancestors' diaries; I gave them names and dates of the Mormon abuse and the abusers; and I quoted damning scriptures, etc.--whatever I needed to put in writing, for me and my children. (The letter was for us, not for the Mormons, as I doubt they even read all of them.) We have copies of that letter in our files, and have given it to a few people to read. The tone of the letter was fact-filled, with references, and valid reasons for leaving. No excuses, no apologies. The letter expressed my love for my children, for Christ's teachings, for humanity.

Don't ask them if you can resign. YOU TELL THEM you are legally resigned as of the moment they receive your letter. YOU TELL THEM that they do not and never did have any authority over you. Don't jump through their hoops.

This sounds silly, but try to enjoy writing your letter. Get it all out of your system!

When we went inactive, the Mormons threatened us! Mormon ward members had already kicked and hit my sons and molested my little girl, so I took the threats seriously. The bishopric, Stake presidency, our home teachers, and some neighbors who taught the gospel essentials class all threatened us with financial troubles, if we stopped paying tithing. This is a standard threat they make to everyone. They said without the Mormon cult, my children would "fail in life." This is also a standard threat, along with "you will lose your forever family." I was sick at the time, and they said if I quit playing the organ (I was ward and stake organist), I would get sicker. I had a serious illness at the time, and I was single, and it was frightening to have groups of men come into my home and threaten me! I thought, "They would be happy if I get sicker and die, because that would prove their cult to be true. Anyone who wants bad things to happen to you is your enemy: therefore, these men are my enemies!"

Mormonism is a cult of lies and threats and fear and hate.

Of course your life will be better after you leave! Of course!

The only negatives of leaving are the punishments that the Mormons create for you. Mormon family members might dis-own you, a Mormon spouse might leave you, you will lose some of your Mormon friends, as shunning is Mormon SOP. You are going to lose a few enemies, that's all.

Be happy in your bright, new life! Congratulations!

Thank you everyone for your support and encouragement. You are the best. So glad I found this forum! Aiming to send letters out next week. :-)

For me resigning was a relief. Yes I lost some fake "friendships" from Relief society sisters over it but it was so worth it for me. No more church callings, no more interviews, no more temple attendance, no more wearing garments, no more paying tithing and so forth.

If you live in Utah it will be harder to resign as the lds population is pretty high but they also have a high number of ex lds members and support groups.

Someone from this board [no-mo] (no no) FORCED me to, threatened me and my family, friends and community, if I didn't. Very manipulative, they are.

I wanted to and was going to anyway... and still need to post-share my 'bio'.

Someday.

Give tscc the finger.
They'll know what to do.
They've been seeing many of them lately.

Remember Quit Mormon

M@t



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/24/2018 12:39PM by moremany.