Since you went exmo? I’m still waiting. Every time I think I’m getting the cool look, it either washes off in the shower or fades with lack of sun. I don’t understand it. I’ve totally dwindled in unbelief. What am I doing wrong?

I peak in late September... Nutty nut brown!!

Plus there’s an except bestseller about you—50 Shades of Grey.

As a nevermo, I surely should be black as night (from the sin, you know ;-).

Sadly, as a natural-born Englishman, I'm still pink, verging on red.

What can I do?



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/16/2018 02:34AM by Soft Machine.

You need to listen to more Procul Harem. Nothing but "A Whiter Shade of Pale" will help.

No, but Mrs. Boner is definitely getting more white.

White and delightsome?

Let’s stop at the white part!

The lord already knows that I’m not enticing to his people, so there’s really no need to afflict me with a sore cursing.

I know. Is white, clean, and tolerable the new "dark, filthy, and loathsome."

I can't even tan in the sun anymore--it just sort of mottles-- and like CripingPin I don't seem to be enticing to anyone at all anymore.

More white if anything. I need some sun for sure.

My complexion is the same but I have received a few dark looks from members of my former Ward ;=(

Only after I spend several hours in the sun!!

Funny how I'm more righteous in the winter out of the sun.

This a shocking but true story. I stopped wearing garments many years ago.

All of the areas of my body that were covered in garments had always been quite white and delightsome.

I've notice in the years since then, that those same areas have become considerably darker, especially when exposed to sunlight at the beach, poolside or in other locations where my skin is exposed to the elements without any sacred garment in between.

Coincidence? I thinketh not.

There is a direct connection. Garments on --> whiter. Garments off --> darker.

I could never go back to wearing the garments. They were always so weird. But I've gotta admit, somethin's goin' on with that whole garment - skin relationship.

It's that extra Sunday recreation solar exposure. You turn back white from vitamin D deficiency.

The Lamanites just needed better sun screen.

I am cursed with a dark outlook.