OK ~

so ~

in the D&C we exmos get to see the false prophet Joseph Smith, Jr. in all his full-blown pathological glory ~

D&C 132 gets lots of air-time because it concerns polygamy which so near and dear to the Mormon-man heart.

the so-called Word of Wisdom in D&C 89 is famous for being the source of all Mormondum's coffee-phobic pride ~

ziller’s favorite is D&C 104 ~

the Almighty Creator of Heaven and Earth, the Universe and Everything ~

(aka Joseph Smith, Jr.) ~

condescends to take time from His busy schedule to micro-manage some minor real estate transactions; ~

i.e.:

D&C 104:28 And let my servant Oliver Cowdery have the lot which is set off joining the house, which is to be for the printing office, which is lot number one, and also the lot upon which his father resides.

this somehow qualifies in Mormondum as holy scripture / sacred revelation ~

in b 4 ~ isn’t it obvious to any semi-objective reader of the D&C that these are the blasphemous blatherings of a simple-minded con-artist who is manipulating even more simple-minded followers in the name of G. O. D. ? ~

</rant> ~

what in your opinion is the biggest pile of crap Section from the D&C ? ~

Section 1 thru Section 138 all seem like crap to me. Official Declarations 1&2 I can also do without.

Otherwise, it's OK.

I had never read dc 104:28 that’s hilarious Z thank you!

Sure it’s ‘scripture’ yeah um-huh....

I vote for 104 as well. In sections 78 and 82, Joe gives silly secret names to himself and his friends, but in section 104, he also gives silly, secret names to:

the tannery (Tahhanes)
the printing office (Laneshine house)
mercantile establishment (Ozondah)
ashery (Shule)
and the city of Kirtland (Shinehah)

D&C 124:63-72, building the Nauvoo House. Now *this* is micromanagement -

63 And they shall form a constitution, whereby they may receive stock for the building of that house.

64 And they shall not receive less than fifty dollars for a share of stock in that house, and they shall be permitted to receive fifteen thousand dollars from any one man for stock in that house.

65 But they shall not be permitted to receive over fifteen thousand dollars stock from any one man.

66 And they shall not be permitted to receive under fifty dollars for a share of stock from any one man in that house.

67 And they shall not be permitted to receive any man, as a stockholder in this house, except the same shall pay his stock into their hands at the time he receives stock;

68 And in proportion to the amount of stock he pays into their hands he shall receive stock in that house; but if he pays nothing into their hands he shall not receive any stock in that house.

69 And if any pay stock into their hands it shall be for stock in that house, for himself, and for his generation after him, from generation to generation, so long as he and his heirs shall hold that stock, and do not sell or convey the stock away out of their hands by their own free will and act, if you will do my will, saith the Lord your God.

70 And again, verily I say unto you, if my servant George Miller, and my servant Lyman Wight, and my servant John Snider, and my servant Peter Haws, receive any stock into their hands, in moneys, or in properties wherein they receive the real value of moneys, they shall not appropriate any portion of that stock to any other purpose, only in that house.

71 And if they do appropriate any portion of that stock anywhere else, only in that house, without the consent of the stockholder, and do not repay four-fold for the stock which they appropriate anywhere else, only in that house, they shall be accursed, and shall be moved out of their place, saith the Lord God; for I, the Lord, am God, and cannot be mocked in any of these things.

72 Verily I say unto you, let my servant Joseph pay stock into their hands for the building of that house, as seemeth him good; but my servant Joseph cannot pay over fifteen thousand dollars stock in that house, nor under fifty dollars; neither can any other man, saith the Lord.


In contrast, god left no clear or detailed instructions on minor matters, such as how to practice polygamy.

2 late 2 log in Wrote:
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> D&C 124:63-72, building the Nauvoo House. Now
> *this* is micromanagement -

I was going to mention this section if no one else did. If someone believes this is what god concerns himself about while children die of malaria and cancer they are seriously messed up. This section displays JS in one of his most transparent con-man moments. Notice that the Nauvoo House was never finished in JS's lifetime. I think the people this section was addressed to didn't take it seriously. Joseph wanted a "hotel" next door so he could keep Emma and his other "wives" under different roofs.

apparently HF wasn't aware of or didn't want to use the word Nincompoop for joey.

the micro-managing tends to prove how stupid the early Mormons were, doesn't it?

Regarding "WofW and tea":

My husband used to love iced tea---but the WofW crossed this off the list of his allowed drinks.

Ain't that ridiculous!?

Section 132 is horrible. Section 89 is silly. Sections 15 and 16 are identical (did the lord forget what he just said?).

I always found great comfort in section 19 “Endless is my name. Wherefore—Eternal punishment is God’s punishment. Endless punishment is God’s punishment.”

Damn, that Jesus can sure hold a grudge.

I can't wait for Rusty to start adding his revelations...
And verily I say unto you that my servant Rusty M Nail, should provide flatulence whenever possible, to release the pressure of his navel. And it should be welcomed with a pleasant countenance by all. My servant Wendy needs to repent for all the mean looks and nasty comments as it was I the lard of hosts who blessed Rusty with an abundance of fartitudes. My servant Rusty also gets to drink diet coke whenever he shall feel the need to do so, and Wendy needs to wear the garment that my servant Rusty provided to her for her nightly resting. Thus it shall be so, peace out.

Are we sure it's a good idea for Russ to add more requirements / commandments?

just checking, mind U...

because it is talked about so much on here. Otherwise, I haven't a clue what the D&C says. It seems I've blocked it from my mind.

IDK of any significant contradictions of the BoM 'over' the Bible (especially new testament), but the Bom & D&C aren't 100% in sync, the 'living prophets' don't seem to be to warm to the D&C either.

D&C 89 probably killed a lot of people who could've boiled water and saved themselves from diptheria and other water-borne diseases in Nauvoo.

never dealt with anything that was not already in Joe's head.

Just imagine if God had revealed the germ theory of disease to Joe and techniques necessary to prevent the spread of cholera and typhus.

Just imagine if God had revealed life-saving medical practices and innovations. What if God had revealed to Joe a technique that made limb regeneration possible and another technique that restored vision to blind people. That would have been impressive.

But what do we get as "revelations"? We get the handshake test in D&C 129, according to which if a disembodied spirit messenger appears to you and you don't know if the messenger is really from god, you simply offer to shake hands. If the spirit messenger is the real deal, he will refuse to shake hands.

But...

"If it be the devil as an angel of light, when you ask him to shake hands he will offer you his hand, and you will not feel anything; you may therefore detect him." [Apparently, the crafty devil doesn't know that this devil detection technique is now in the books for anyone to read.]

As far as I know, the devil-detector handshake revelation has been useful to exactly 0.0 (zero point zero) people during the past 200 years.

Then we get D&C 111. That's the one where Joe, Sid, Ollie and Hy went to Salem to find treasure.

From the descriptive heading:

"Hearing that a large amount of money would be available to them in Salem, the Prophet, Sidney Rigdon, Hyrum Smith, and Oliver Cowdery traveled there from Kirtland, Ohio, to investigate this claim, along with preaching the gospel." [Note: You know the writer of the heading just threw in that "along with preaching the gospel" part as an afterthought because they realized that the fact that these guys were taking a trip to Salem focused on getting money is not good optics. There actually is nothing in the "revelation" about preaching the gospel.]

D&C 111:

3 Therefore, it is expedient that you should form acquaintance with men in this city, as you shall be led, and as it shall be given you.

4 And it shall come to pass in due time that I will give this city into your hands, that you shall have power over it, insomuch that they shall not discover your secret parts; and its wealth pertaining to gold and silver shall be yours.

[Note: They didn't find any gold or silver in Salem. The only question is whether their secret parts were discovered, whatever that means. It sounds vaguely dirty. Keep your hands off my secret parts. ]
==================
So there you have two more revelatory gems from the D&C. A useless devil-detector handshake test and a failed treasure hunt.

Idiotic, imbecilic, moronic....

D&C:124 as mentioned above
$15,000 to each in mid 1830s was like getting $410,000 today, keep in mind the cost of goods, staples in 1830 too... example
In the west US in 1830 it was possible to buy a horse for as little as $10, but a decent riding equine cost around $150,

Looking cumulatively at them the intent of what JS was doing comes clear:

God said you need to give me your property
God said you need to accept me boinking other women
God said you need to follow trivial rules to show your commitment
God said you need to follow whatever I decide to add to this
God said you need to accept things I write in the sections as if it was God speaking


It was like a giant game of Simon Says for the believer and a total con job.

dagny Wrote:
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> God said you need to accept me boinking other women
> God said you need to follow trivial rules ....

Great list, Dagny!!!

was any of the land that the Mormons settled in (Illinois, Ohio) previously surveyed or deeded? IOW, did they purchase it (or rent it) from a previous owner?

Section 132

which clearly states that to Mormons Plural Marriage is the New and Everlasting Covenant

So much for Mormons being "Christians" LOL

Section end-to-end.
Even the ends don't meet! we
No reason to read any of it.

D&C 132 mentions virgins in the context of getting more wives. I mean what is more a pile of crap than objectifying women ala Heber C. Kimball not thinking of getting another wife as anything more than another cow.

Sigh-If Only Joey, BY, & a few others were with us today to explain themselves...

Right?

My biggest reason for 132 is the obvious patch job it is. No one knows for sure it was Joe's and it is such a disconnect from the realities Briggy and Heber practiced.

If there ever were a giant steaming pile in Mormon canonized scriptures it is either related to polygamy or Joe's translating ability. Probably both.

I always found 49 funny; not so much for the content, but the fact that the Shakers probably told them to go pound sand. :D

I like the one that talks about how important it is to buy forged church documents from a guy called Huffman. {Well, give Joe a break. He couldn't get all his alleged prophecies right}

Then there's the one that talks about the importance of cleaning up downtown SLC for a higher purpose.

Of course, the section of D and C that accurately declares that God does not lead a poor people and or church. He tells the First Presidency to get 32 Billion into his storehouse.

Damn~
I never should have left. :D

makes me (inquiring mind, ha ha): Why haven't they done a buy-back in favor of a revised - condensed edition, jettison the superficial superfluous sections out?

First: think of a catchy new title; Anyone?