Joe Smith was a perv
He married Mom's and daughters
Golden plates really?

Suffer the children
Said Jesus even the Christ
We suffered all right

Candle on the wind,
Flickered until out it blew
Like vapor rising.

I like RfM.
People rage at the machine,
But they also love.

(from a song)

Starship and Haiku
Dying hate and living love
Reach beyond your sins

Starship and haiku
A last long reminder of
All that might have been

Jesus The Christus
Was enlarged to show heathens
Mormons are Christians

http://www.lightplanet.com/mormons/art/christus.html

Joe shot in the face
Young was evil and horny
Oh yes, pay lay ale

Grew up in the church
Saw the light as an adult
Enjoy life much more

Tal wrote a great song
His arguments are sketchy
But he writes good songs

When false claims are made
ificouldhietokolob
Posts to set things straight

Bagley amuses
With few words he says a lot
He cuts to the chase

Steve Benson’s great too
He posts massive walls of text
With much lampooning

I think I’m done now
Much haiku about nothing
Someone get the hook…

Decided I have
my own religion to start
Yoda my god will be

I wake up happy ev'ry
day. I know why, but
I don't want to brag.

Okay children, today we are going to learn about Japanese poems called haiku.
A haiku is just like a normal American poem, except that it doesn't rhyme, and it's totally stupid.

sonofperdition Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Okay children, today we are going to learn about
> Japanese poems called haiku.
> A haiku is just like a normal American poem,
> except that it doesn't rhyme, and it's totally
> stupid.

...totally stupid, perhaps, but 17 syllables of stupid.

Haiku doesn't rhyme
Just seventeen syllables
Maybe it's stupid

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Most poems rhyme
But this one doesn't

exmo haiku makes me laugh.

Thanx !!

sacrament boredom
bishop spews sacred green jello
blessing me to death

Too Mormon to leave
Like Rock, I really believe
Someday I'll be ex'd

I have left the church
My family is dismayed
They wish I had stayed

They say I would stay
If I could just not be gay
They are mistaken

I show them the truth
They all refuse to listen
And insist I'm wong

They are all deceived
And still cannot perceive it
While I have been freed

Perhaps they may change
But I greatly fear they won't
The church is a cult

Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb
Joseph Smith was a prophet
Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb

The Morg uses fear
It is its biggest weapon
Skid marks on garments

The Book of Mormon
the foundation of your church?
You are kidding right?

An angel did what?
He gave you a gold bible?
Dumb. Dumb. Dumb. Dumb. Dumb.

(props to Southpark)

Thanks to Joseph’s taste
For wealth, power and women
Millions duped and conned

Give Satan his due
Mormons become atheists
Either way he wins



ziller

I used to pay tithes
To a gluttonous empire
Now they can fuck off

But I'll honor the rule in the breaking...

Donny and Marie,
Mormon entertainers, so?
Eat your damn corn flakes.

Salt Lake Cabbie,
Stealing from "Angry Housewives,"
Road rage must be served.

God wouldn't answer
So, I called upon Satan
He ignored me too

Plates of Gold remind
of remaining dross behind
recovering minds

Brainwashed children claim knowledge
Fearful minds shut down
Families suffer

Missionaries sneak
To invade my private space
Till I hose them down

While questions followed
erstwhile cogent implosion
of silly logic.

Nothing from nothing
leaves not a thing in its wake,
As I bid adieu.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 06/11/2015 11:20PM by amyjo.

Mine worked better as a dirty limerick:

Young Joseph said "help me here Jesus
I'm lazy and poor but a genius"
He made up a vision
Began a religion
And now he can fuck who he pleases

I've never written a limerick that was lewd,
For if not done poetically, I shall be booed,
Should anatomy inspire,
Ideas that I require,
Then, I can write something witty and crude.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 06/12/2015 01:12AM by archytas.

She's a licked cupcake
There'll be no RM for her
She'll be an old maid

Modest is hottest
Hearing that makes me vomit
Women get the blame

No longer Mormon
Must have sinned to fall away
That is news to me

Learned the Church is a vile cult.
Thank you, internet!
No baptism for me.

torturednevermo
Mormon neighbors out of bounds
Kind genderbender