I'll type exactly what I posted on Reddit.

So I told my mom last night, and I'll type what she wrote back to me.

"Hey Misty-your dad and I love you so much! We will always love you no metter what! You're right-it does make me a little sad to hear this-only because we know how we feel about our relationship with God.

I'll let you in on a little secret from my past, I've been right where tou are! I felt like I was faking it-feeling it when I was "supposed to". It wasn't until we had you (I was born 3 months early and ended up having no disabillities, thank you doctors) that I knew God was real. You were such a miracle-you shouldn't have made it, but you did. When I prayed about you I always felt like everything was going to be ok with you.

Now is the time in your life when you do start to question things, it's totally normal, it's what you do when you're finding yourself! I respect what you're going through-I kmow you'll respect us enough to not bad mouth the church or its' teachings to others. You are a great person-I'm excited to see where you'll end up-who you'll be.

I am always here to talk about anything! We will have you still go to meetings because it's what we do as a family in this house, I hope you'll respect out request for that, and yes, we will still have you go to seminary-because-you may possibly change your mind later on in life-that's totally an ok thing to do.

Most of all I care that you are a kind, loving, person-and I care that you always are that person to your family and those around you.

I hope you'll always continue to make good choices-we want you to have a very happy life and we always want to be a part of your life.

I'm thankful that you felt comfortable enough to talk to me about this. I am always here for you. If you have questions or other things on your mind, just write or talk to me!

I love you so much, Misty-more than you'll ever know!"


Well...looks like she probably expects basically the same but at least she knows! Wonder if they'll still make me do priesthood stuff despite all this (I turn 15 soon)

I can tell that she hopes it's just a phase, but, sadly, it isn't.

You are lucky. It's like she took a class in now to handle this, almost. Wise woman, your mother.

I was surprised at your last line, ". . . just a phase, but, sadly, it isn't." Realizing the church was a lie was one of the most beautiful moments of my life. Nothing sad about it. So that is one I won't share with you. The church had me in chains.

Follow your mother's advice. Make smart choices. Some things you can never undo, never take back. Building a future means keeping it in mind as you deal with the present.

Following your mother's request to continue with the church programs will allow her to feel she has done the best for you. That is a great gift to give to her. Return her love. Of course the more you are subjected to the church the more it will annoy probably.

You handled this very well. I guess you got that from your Mother.

Done & Done Wrote:
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> You are lucky. It's like she took a class in now
> to handle this, almost. Wise woman, your mother.
I am not too surprised, she always seemed quite accepting but I’m grateful to have her
> I was surprised at your last line, ". . . just a
> phase, but, sadly, it isn't." Realizing the
> church was a lie was one of the most beautiful
> moments of my life. Nothing sad about it. So
> that is one I won't share with you. The church
> had me in chains.
Moreso sad for her, I feel way better about myself if I don’t go by what the church said! I’m glad I found out!
> Follow your mother's advice. Make smart choices.
> Some things you can never undo, never take back.
> Building a future means keeping it in mind as you
> deal with the present.
Yep, that’s very true
> Following your mother's request to continue with
> the church programs will allow her to feel she has
> done the best for you. That is a great gift to
> give to her. Return her love. Of course the more
> you are subjected to the church the more it will
> annoy probably.
That’s just a side effect...I do hope that she’ll warm up to me not doing seminary, at least!
> You handled this very well. I guess you got that
> from your Mother.
100% yeah, haha. Thank you for your comments!!!

You have a great Mum .Avoid seminary if you can.(or take a tablet with you for entertainment)

Glad she’s keeping your options open. Like the time I decided not to get a frontal lobotomy, I never know if I’m going to change my mind.

Yeah, huh. Still got Seminary but you can’t say “bad things” about the church. Isn’t that where the truth leads? If you study actual church history, Seminary could be a lot of fun.

What your mom doesn’t get is that what has been seen can’t be unseen. It’s not a matter of believing harder. That said, you have a 14 year old brain inside your head so you should listen to your mom. Find a way to make it work. Treat the church as a social club.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 11/24/2020 11:06AM by bradley.

bradley Wrote:
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> Glad she’s keeping your options open. Like the
> time I decided not to get a frontal lobotomy, I
> never know if I’m going to change my mind.
>
> Yeah, huh. Still got Seminary but you can’t say
> “bad things” about the church. Isn’t that
> where the truth leads? If you study actual church
> history, Seminary could be a lot of fun.
Maybe...haha
> What your mom doesn’t get is that what has been
> seen can’t be unseen. It’s not a matter of
> believing harder. That said, you have a 14 year
> old brain inside your head so you should listen to
> your mom. Find a way to make it work. Treat the
> church as a social club.
the only guy that’s around my age is annoying as hell, but hey, i’ll try!! thank you!

misty99 Wrote:
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> the only guy that’s around my age is annoying as
> hell, but hey, i’ll try!! thank you!

You changed. Maybe he will!

(OTOH, people hoped I'd change. They thought maybe I was an Aspy and could improve, but it turned out I'm just a congenital jerk.)

agreed with the "can't unsee what you have seen". No matter how hard you try and believe me I have tried to bury what I have seen and experienced through addictions and such. Like that Metallica song " the memory remains". Very true.

sixteen year-old ziller had concluded that the book of mormon, joseph’s myth and mormonism was probably the biggest load of crapola ever ~

with this new world-view, he no longer felt it necessary to attend early morning seminary before school ~

after two glorious days in a row of sleeping in, ziller’s parental units made it clear that they felt differently ~

unless ziller drove himself and his little brother to seminary each morning, his automobile privileges would be revoked and he would have to take the bus to school ~

the early morning hours of the next day found ziller guiding the 1979 Chevy Monte Carlo through the dark suburban streets toward the home of the “cemetery” teacher ~

ziller glanced at the clock on the dash and thought of his non-mormon girlfriend ~

she would be getting up soon to get ready for school ~

her parents would already have left to commute to their jobs in the big city ~

soon she would be stretching and arching her tan taut body across the sheets of her double bed while the alarm teased her awake ~

her long blonde hair would be tossed into a picture perfect mess of bed-head ~

ziller parked under a street lamp outside the seminary teacher’s house ~

the baby blue Monte Carlo’s chrome spoke wheels reflected in the home’s large plate glass living room window ~

“little brother? ziller has some stuff to do before school instead of going to seminary. you can find a ride to school from here, right?” ~

“well, if it is all the same to you, big brother, would you mind dropping me off at my friend so-and-so’s house?” ~

ziller put the car in gear and pulled back into the street ~

he and little brother never attended another day of seminary and everyone was happy ~


¸¸><((((º> ¸.•´¯`•.¸¸><((((º>¸.•´¯`•.¸¸><((((º>¸.•´¯`•.¸¸

yep that’s exactly what happened

hahaha I love you ziller. Stretching her tan taut body hahaha. Sleezy ziller.

I'm glad it went so well.

There are some subtle things you to be aware of:

She thinks it is just a phase. Possibly this true, but generally once you start thinking, it's hard to un-know what you know.

She provided a "miracle" (involving you, how convenient) as evidence, which is fine, but hardly any kind of convincing proof for anything. People survive close calls all the time.

She doesn't want you to talk about it to others. This is always interesting because it admits that their truth can't hold up to scrutiny. They are conditioned to protect others from any insight that might make them start thinking.

She wants you to continue to go to church, where you will be pressured to fake it until you make it, including priesthood and mission stuff. You might need to push back if the bishop and everyone start ganging up on you.

Sometimes what happens is over time, there is a girl (or whatever) who becomes interesting to you at church. There are so many cases of guys doing church stuff to get the girl. I know because I converted some guy who thought that would make me marry him (it didn't because he wasn't a good enough Mormon at the time). Anyway, the church is used as bait for dates so be aware of that angle.

Be aware, there are religions and other groups that are worse than Mormonism. Be aware they are always looking for vulnerable young people who are looking for a cause. Don't go from the frying pan to the fire. You have a lot of potential. Use it wisely.

Overall, it sounds like your mom is wise. Be the best person you can. They are convinced that anyone who leaves the church is a bad person in some way. Show them that not believing and being honest about it has made you an even better person. Do the best in school that you can. You are lucky to have started questioning so early.

Hey Misty---I would recommend memorizing the above. Some of the best information you could have.

Have a great Thanksgiving.

I was about your age when I said I am done with this religion and God(yes it is only recently that I have seen that God or Christ or Mr. Universe(totally separate from religion) is actually maybe helping me for real after all the bs that was allowed to happen to me) but thats another tale for another time.

God still has to prove himself to me through merit not words after the hell that I went through. I don't give a d@mn about words anymore. You prove you are legit through merit(actions) from now on whether you are human or Jesus himself. God gave me two predators that wore pretend masks(pretend personalities) to fool everybody as parents and put me in a cult on top of it without me even knowing it was a cult so basically God gave me the middle finger in my opinion. Said F-you Adam. Good luck as I throw you to the wolves in sheep's clothing to your death.

At least in my head I pretty much quit religion and life after traumatic events happened to me. I was about 13 years old. A person I saw recently that viewed part of my past actually said I was 12 years old. Which could be correct because I was in junior high at age 12 and I knew i was in junior high at the time so I thought I was 13. But I was 13 in junior high also. Either way I was pretty young when I said screw all this and I said screw life on top of it.

But yea, forgot what I was trying to really say. Oh yea, I do know how you feel to an extent.

that was a good post ~



thanks Adam for posting that ~



it will help exmos ~

I finally got a good post from ziller. It took 3 or 4 years of posting on here but I finally did it.

Thanks ziller. I can die a happy man.

Ummm, How about the back story [you shared on read it but not here]?

You have to tell them you're not going- at least try to resist, in order to have some peace, love, and free will.

If your mom really wants to talk about it, talk away... YAY, have some sway.

I KNEW, at your age, TSCC wasn't TRUE, forthright, or even remotely GOOD... (I just couldn't point it out, but you can); I just didn't "know" (until many years later [this was BC "before 'cellphones'/ 'computers'"], at the time.

misty99 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

“Now is the time in your life when you do start to question things, it's totally normal”

==The time to question anything is at anytime, no matter what your age is.
The problem with some parents is that they take advantage of the trusting nature of kids and insert religion into them.
Some parents keep their kids as kids instead of teaching them how to be an adult. Part of being an adult, a fully functional adult means being a skeptic. Question everything.

Seth Andrews has a video about it. He used to be a hardcore atheists until age 28.
He has a nice voice and did christian radio. That is, until he met Matt Dillahunty who deprogrammed him.

Get Them While They're Young: How Children are Targeted by the Religious and Why by Seth Andrews
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKd_JGkdW6s
Length = 1:40:53

I deprogrammed myself at age 11 or 12. I used to be a christian.

We need to teach kids how to be curious, how to be skeptics, the value of scientific research. A good dose of philosophy, teaching people about all religions would help to leave behind the old days.

“It wasn't until we had you (I was born 3 months early and ended up having no disabilities, thank you doctors) that I knew God was real.”

==That’s not how you determine that a god is real. And also, which god? The god of that your parents thought you about and the religion that goes along with it?
If you were hindu, then you would be certain now that the hindu gods are real.
If you were a russian from thousands of years ago, then you would be certain that the russian gods are real.
If you were a mongolian from thousands of years ago, then you would be certain that the mongolians gods are real.
And so forth.

Well, I am glad that you survived, your mother survived.
I suggest that you go to the priesthood thing and such and learn as much as you can. Do you enjoy learning?
Prepare some files, take notes.

~~~~iceman9090

Sounds like your mother is going to force you to pretend you still believe in mormonism bc that’s what you all do in this family.

Probably the next thing you need to think about is whether or not you’re ok with playing mormon for appearances sake or in the hopes you’ll get through this questioning stage or whatever.

I’m sure she’s a good and loving mother, but 14-year-olds separate from their parents. It’s what they do.

I think Misty's mom is hoping it is a phase that Misty will eventually grow out of. From what I've observed, teens who lose interest in church, but eventually go back, never fully lost their faith to begin with.

It's not unusual for parents even in non-Mormon households to require teens to follow the program as long as they are dependent and living under their roof. College becomes more negotiable, and a lot of kids follow the program when at home, but do what they want at school. And of course once a young person becomes fully independent, they can do whatever they want.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/25/2020 08:36AM by summer.

summer Wrote:
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Yes, freedom is probably the most important thing of all.

~~~~iceman9090