hmmmm, I heard that it was a beautiful spring day. That should get us started.

"Oh how lovely was the morning, radiant beamed the sun ABOVE..."

I'm guessing it must have been sometime between 9am and noon according to the words of the song.

It was between March 21 and June 21 I think. So pick a day.

It was April 31.

That's a fact when you pray about it :D

I thought it was February 30th.

Thirteen O'clock

At least that's what Mickey Mouse told the prophet Bobby Goldsboro.

It was quite a shock

It was February 31.

Haha. For sure!

Date and time? That's easy: never and never.

Sorry, I have no idea when the alleged 14-year old Joe Junior had his moment in the grove.

But, for the record, I can remember the following that took place with me some 40+ years ago:

- 8 years old: the exact day and date of my baptism into Mormonism.

- 8 years old: the exact day and date of my confirmation into Mormonism.

- 8 years old: the exact gift my dad gave me on the day of my confirmation.

- 8 years old: the exact spot in the stake center chapel where I sat during the Sacrament Meeting of my confirmation.

- 12 years old: the exact day and date of the first time I passed the Sacrament as a Deacon.

- 12 years old: the exact day and date I wore my first Sears Department store suit as I passed the Sacrament as a Deacon.

- 12 years old: the exact spot in our chapel where I was sitting when I first spoke at the pulpit in a Fast and Testimony meeting.

Isn't it curious that Joe Junior's account stating "in the Spring of 1820" wasn't clarified by the almighty God who forgot himself to give his servant Joe Junior a revelation that made him REMEMBER the EXACT date?

And guess what? I know I wasn't foreordained from the pre-existence to be second to Jesus Christ in importance with the awesome responsibility chosen by God to restore his one-true-church! Yea verily, verily, if I had been the one guy chosen, yea foreordained to restore God's one-true-church, I KNOW I COULD N-O-T forget the details or the date when I saw God and Jesus hovering in the air while we had a delightful three-way conversation amidst 'bees humming, sweet birds singing and music ringing through the grove.'

There are probably FOUR different options, for those FOUR different "First Vision" stories.

Hey, we can't expect Joe to remember the date when he was busy remembering everything that was said to him (including Old Testament passages).

Plus, it's hard to remember trivial details like date and time when you don't "remember" anything about the incident for 18 years or so.

Exactly half past 'give a shit'.

Nobody can show any evidence it happened at all, let alone the *exact* moment.

Odd, isn't it, that Joe couldn't give an exact date for that alleged vision, but he COULD give an exact date for the visit from the angel Moroni (or Nephi - whichever): September 21.

Another odd contradiction: God would not allow anyone to see the gold plates from which the Book of Mormon was translated, except for a handful of Joe's friends selected by God. They were too sacred. BUT the papyri from which the sacred Book of Abraham was translated were exhibited to one and all, for 25¢ a peek.

God moos in mysterious waves.

The allegations of super-sophisticated NSA surveillance programs are nothing in comparison to the loving heavenly 24/7 surveillance program that Heavenly Father and the Angels lovingly put on the thoughts/actions on everyone. If you think modern technology is amazing then think what its like when its celestial and perfect. That way the rap sheets can be prepared for Judgment Day in order to make sure you can be thoroughly judged. The incredible feelings of joy that a person shall feel when they think about the ramifications of this will help them better understand what its like to be TBM. I suppose I could try questioning an "every fibre of my being; without a shadow of a doubt" testimony but that would mean to commit the disgusting evil gross sin of doubt so I couldn't possibly consider thinking such a thing unless I'm looking to be shredded to pieces at Judgment Day. Isn't the Gospel so refreshing and relaxing for all freedom/privacy seeking people?

So when exactly did the First Vision take place? Well certainly the only people who could possibly think that this isn't known with very good certainty are those who don't believe that God/Angels are doing their work in heaven. Though your Ward clerks might be slackers the folks in heaven are perfect.

The correct answer is: Never. It didn't happen.

It was June 5th at 10:43 exactly.

Hang on!
How you know that?

God told me.
We were playing golf at the time and I asked him straight out.
He said "I know the exact time and date because of the very fine Rolex watch Moses gave me for my birthday."
I looked at his gold watch and replied. "For Gods sake God. That's a fake Rolex and it has stopped!"
'Oh Shit!" He says. "That Jesus was supposed to be back on earth twenty-five years ago!"



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/11/2017 01:59PM by davetheseer.

I'm pretty sure it was at a desk in 1838. JS needed a good story to continue selling his product.

Have not you seen the video where the MORmON experts go into great detail on how they have the exact time / day figured out when The First vision happened based on weather for various years and other attendant details of Joe SMith's (BULL SHIT) story ?

It is simply amazing watching MORmONS concoct reinforcing (Supposed) proofs for events that NEVER happened !!! especially when they involved people who never existed !!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4BQrl4EZ07Y

Some Mormons like to claim it happened on April 6th, since pretty much everything else related to Mormonism did, too.

Apparently he was smoking something and can't seem to remember details. However, no report of him getting the munchies afterward.

Ding ding ding. We HAVE a winner!

Coincidentally I happen to known the EXACT day, time, and location.

As you can imagine, gaining this information, verifying it, and maintaining it are grueling, time-consuming, expensive tasks.

But I'm willing to reveal all this to my fellow ExMos for only $39.99 (+ $19.99 shipping/handling). Compare this price to what I charge TBMs: $69.99 (+$29.99 s/h).

Just send your remittance (U.S. currency only) to:

getbusylivin
Trailer 17B
Joseph Smith Memorial Trailer Parque and Horse Rendering Facility
Frontage Road 8
Emma's Folly, UT 80091

"You Can Trust Me--I Used To Be A Mormon"

Who doesn't? Ask a million members/ former members and get a million answers. Someone already gave the right (my) answer - though they are all correct, in one way or another - so I'll give another.

First of all, as you know, it didn't happen (yet). Sorry if this burst your bubble but you can always blow another one.

Do you have a time machine? If so, I'd like a date.

Were the mushrooms freshly picked from a horse tird...or were they dried from the previous summer...morms are mushrooms anyway...kept in the dark and fed horse poop...a road apple a day...will keep logical thought away...bon appetit...dont forget to pay