For me it would be the Christensen* family. Just all around arrogant and unpleasant. One time I called Brother Christensen at about 8:30 p.m. on a Monday to dutifully collect the monthly hometeaching report from him. He hadn't responded to my email and I was getting pressure from the powers above to turn it in.

I had waited until I thought it was late enough to not interrupt Family Home Evening with his little kids, but not too late. He berated me ... "Are you really calling on family night? You do not interrupt people on Monday nights." Then he hung up.

Now I will grant that I was being ultra-TBM at the time, and it is annoying to get church calls at any time. Maybe even more annoying than usual on a Monday night. But just a jerk way to react for someone who was ostensibly on the "same team."

But Sister Christensen took the cake. She was on my wife's facebook feed. One time she got in some sort of argument with another sister in the ward. This other sister apologized and said she hoped it wouldn't ruin their friendship. Sister Christensen said, closely paraphrasing, "I want you to know we are not friends. You aren't anything like me and we don't have anything in common." Of course in a public thread for all to see.

The whole family just rubbed me the wrong way. Standoffish, holier-than-thou, blessed above others due to their "righteousness".



*Name may or may not be changed to protect identity.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/03/2017 10:19PM by paulk.

Bednar the guy thinks he's the pope or higher too good to talk to me or the peons that pay his apostle salary.

When I had my miserable stint as a servant of the lord my "best two years" turned into "an extremely anxious 13 months"

I met a lot of jerks in the church while I was out there. I dont know if this guy was the biggest (probably my mp was) but the incident came to my mind when I read your title.

So its Pday. Me and my companion are tired anyway. Pday in my mission only lasted til 6pm and didnt start until 10am. Thats 8 hours, but we also spent an hour reading and writing emails, an hour taking turns doing laundry (4 of us) and about an hour grocery shopping. So Pday is really P 5 hours.

At this time I was a pretty big rule breaker. My companion at the time was just returning from the mission because he tore his ACL while playing hide-and-go-seek at a ward activity months before. Him being fresh from the comforts of home, I swayed him to just take the whole PDAY with me and we could just do our laundry and shopping tomorrow.

So at around 8pm we stop in walmart in our normal clothes because I hated wearing a nametag like some sort of dog.

Anyway a resident of the local ward was also at this walmart and immediately recognized me and felt the need to berate us for "wasting the lords time"

My poor companion felt bad. I mostly felt put out because after that my companion wasnt so easy going.
But I was also furious. I wanted to yell at that man that I was a damned adult and I hardly know him. Just because we occupied the same space a few sundays in a row doesnt give him the ability to disrespect me!!!
Sadly, I timidly muttered an apology and we left. But I still bought myself a Pink shirt that said "This is your girlfriends shirt" Which at the time was funny because I was in the closet.

Jeez... I think it would have been epic if you'd said just that to the guy. But I know it would have led to trouble, which sucks. It sucks that a church can reduce adults to such a childlike state and they can't feel comfortable shopping at Walmart whenever they need to.

Hmm...hard to choose.

I once was assigned to visit teach a woman who was pretty high maintenance. She was the kind who expected that dinners be brought to her for the smallest ailment. My partner and I were always going above and beyond for her.

To thank me for my extra effort, during one of my visits to her house she told me that I was terrible at my calling. She said that she'd gone to the bishop to let him know that I wasn't doing an adequate job and needed to be replaced. The verbal beating lasted for about 15 minutes until I finally got up and walked out.

She later left a message on my machine saying that she hoped I wasn't offended, but she was "impressed" to say what she did. I called the R.S. president and asked that my visiting teaching be changed. The woman got word of that and then called me to say that I didn't understand forgiveness and that she had talked to the bishop about me again so that he could call me into his office and properly counsel me.

The bishop never talked to me. I'm guessing that I wasn't the only person that she treated like that. She was nuts.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/03/2017 10:19PM by want2bx.

I guess the bishop knew she was nuts as well.

My mission president. Liar, bully, pompous, slimy, windbag, overcompensating for being short and bald. And in his post-MP years, a convicted thief.

As far as non-leaders, Unfortunately that might have been MOI...

Apols to those I've offended,

The Devil made me do it!

just about all of them.

62% of the members of the Seattle Second Ward in the 70's, 80's & 90's

My first priest's quorum adviso, Brother Hogensen (deceased). Uber TBM guy. His day job was as a high school French teacher (who had served his mission in Paris and wouldn't stop talking about it) and a real self righteous asshole. We were a bunch of hormone charged 16-17 year olds and he was all about pounding the B of M and his mission stories into us....and we were somewhat inattentive...and he up and quit about 5 minutes into the lesson one Sunday morning. Good riddance.

RB



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 02/04/2017 04:03PM by Lethbridge Reprobate.

When we were briefly living with my parents and attending their ward, I picked up my then 6-year old from his primary class. The teacher, an older woman, I'd guess her sixties, told me that he had fallen asleep in class. She then added, "If he's just going to sleep, then he shouldn't come back."

Now this didn't "offend" me into not wanting to come back (I was kind of already on my way out anyway), but I was still pretty shocked by a primary teacher trying to kick my son off the straight and narrow just because he was tired.

Brother Rose in a BYU Stake Presidency who told me he could tell just by looking at me if I was masturbating. He was a little weasel of a man who'd stare at me from the stand. Finally, I was so embarrassed by him that I moved out of my apartment to a place across town to get out of that BYU Stake.

Fuck you, Rose! You were a pervert torturing a young man who was stupid enough not to lie to you. BYU Boner!

Well, I can usually tell by looking at someone if they are masturbating - even if it's under the table . . .

Especially if he had a boner from BYU haha

:)

We all get a little crazy when we dont masturbate boner

Well my friend, I think he was doing it to the max. He certainly had a fixation on it. And staring at young men...Wanna bet he had a porn problem?

nonsequiter Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> We all get a little crazy when we dont masturbate
> boner


That might explain a lot of things. Does it refer to BYU Boner?

dishonorable mention to the faculty JERKS at BYU

Vaughn Dearden

Jim Oliver, after I had been cleaned out by paying for an LDS mission, and then attempting to pay outrageous BYU tuition that actually subsidized his own children's tuition at BYU, Jim was absolutely insistent on charging me a day's wages at the min wage back then for some piece of steel from the BYU machine shop scrap bin that I needed for a car repair to keep my old car going. A person on the bottom of MORmONISM is never so far down that they can not be stomped down a little more. Brigham "everything is mine!!" Young would have been proud of Jim. and Brigham would have taken the money from Jim too.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wcKM7orX1V8

And my response would have been "Just by looking at you I can tell you're an asshole"

"Brother Rose in a BYU Stake Presidency who told me he could tell just by looking at me if I was masturbating."

Don't ya wish you could have responded with "Since studies show that almost all men masturbate, you have a pretty good chance of being right."

Of course, I could have held up a mirror to his nose, but I doubt he would have had a reflection! The undead are all alike.

Me. I should've known better what I was getting into. Really hung myself out to dry.

Hey, I hang myself out to dry a lot!

My dad was number one.

It was a stake high councilman who thought he was Jesus Christ.

"It was a stake high councilman who thought he was Jesus Christ."

Did he try to preside over all the meetings? :-)

late 60's - My husband had been drafted, but fortunately sent to a base in Europe. Unfortunately I and our baby had to wait several months to join him there. After obtaining passports, shots and him finding an apartment for us, we were finally reunited.

We were invited to have dinner at the home of some stake leader. I don't remember what position he held, but the evening progressed into more of an interview than a social occasion. After dinner I spent time in the kitchen with the wife where she proceeded to give me homemaking tips (o-kaaay).

We were then quizzed by this man as to our tithing standing.
DH obsequiously mumbled that we were behind since the costs of getting me overseas had drained our savings. I was stunned that a person I had never met before was asking questions about our finances. This stranger then stated that tithing should have come before my travel.

And lo, these many years, I still feel that slow burn.

A bishop I had while at BYU. Sure, I admit that I had skipped a lot of church willfully and with no good reason. But there was a period of time when my mother had just had major surgery and was confined to her bed while my father was out of town on business, so I went home every weekend to care for her -- and no, we didn't go to church! Right in the middle of that time, this asshole bishop calls me in for an "ecclesiastical interview" and literally starts yelling at me from the get-go, commanding me to attend every single church meeting from that time forward or he would, as he put it, "get (me) kicked out of school." And he wouldn't even listen to me when I tried to explain those most recent absences. You can bet he got a big earful from my dad when he got home; there was a lot of yelling then, too, as I recall.

This bishop was just one of those types, you know? Ultra-TBM hardass, prioritized TSCC WAY above family, incredibly self-righteous and holier-than-thou, and lorded over everyone with his so-called "authority." I very nearly opened up on him that night (I mean yelling back, not violence or anything). Maybe I should have, in retrospect. I would have been far better off transferring to a normal university. I think he also hated me because I refused to go on a mission -- god forbid, a severely depressed and socially-anxious 18-year-old decline that greatest of callings! Hmph.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 02/04/2017 06:02AM by oneinbillions.

This thread is very inspirational. I grew up Presbyterian and wasn't exposed to many church jerks. But this thread did remind me of one... and now I am writing about her.

Devere Harris, Idaho Falls Temple President

Glenn R. " I can not stop talking about masturbation in public settings" Stubbs, Ricks not much of a College LDS Religion Studies Faculty Professor and all around foul disgusting POS !!!
A guy who actually made a living being a POS.


Bruce R. McDonkey McConkie legend in his own mind and MORmON ASSpostHOLE Another guy who made a living being a POS.

My own SUPER @$$ hole resident MORmON enforcement agent and world class piss poor excuse for a male parent.


Yah, I gradually awoke to the conclusion that EVEN IF there really was a MORmON Heaven, I would NOT want to be there with the totally self infatuated POS MORmONS that I knew.

We had a bishop, A. Monte H***, who would always accompany us on our boy scout campouts. He had two or three boys of his own at that age.

Every single time we would be sitting around the campfire he would lecture us about not farting in public. He claimed he never even farted in the bathroom and that we should follow his example.

Can you imagine the fun a bunch of boy scouts who had just consumed 2 or 3 gallons of pork and beans had with that one.

He was the consummate douche. Talk about a stick in his butt, he had an entire 6x6 beam shoved in there.

Sterling

It was probably that stick stuck up his backside that stopped him from farting.........lol

I wonder where the bastard bishop DOES deem it acceptable to fart? I would think a bathroom would be an excellent place. Does the man know that unless a person's gastric system is absolutely not functioning, a person does pass gas daily? Maybe he claims to be like the late Kim Jong Il who declared himself to be so evolved as a being that he neither urinated nor defecated. (It's possible that the late Korean dictator didn't pee or poop due to kidney and intestinal shutdown just before he died, but it would have had nothing to do with evolution as a being and everything to do with horrible health.) While I agree that there are better and worse places to let it all out, and that when a person has the luxury of control, one should expel one's gas in a place where the fewest number of people will be affected, but sometimes one just slips out. (The "putt-putts are usually olfactorally the least offensive. It's the 'silent but deadly" flatulence that has the greatest potency and staying power. There's even a section in the 1987 (I think) edition of the Merck Manual in which the authors of the section address it directly and quite humorously for what is a high;y clinical publication.

S2 in Chandler Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> We had a bishop, A. Monte H***, who would always
> accompany us on our boy scout campouts. He had two
> or three boys of his own at that age.
>
> Every single time we would be sitting around the
> campfire he would lecture us about not farting in
> public. He claimed he never even farted in the
> bathroom and that we should follow his example.
>
> Can you imagine the fun a bunch of boy scouts who
> had just consumed 2 or 3 gallons of pork and beans
> had with that one.
>
> He was the consummate douche. Talk about a stick
> in his butt, he had an entire 6x6 beam shoved in
> there.
>
> Sterling

What a dumb shit! Seems like all that gas has poisoned his brain.

as I think this question through, I'm sad to say that the answer is my husband. No one has treated me as unkindly as he has during my discovery of the truth.

So sorry to hear that.

Fortunately I knew many more great people and friends in the church than I did jerks. The jerks though really went out of their way to be "jerky".

When my sweetheart passed away from cancer a custody battle ensued with her ex. The children had been out of touch with him for several years. During the marriage this priesthood holding Bishopric member father of theirs had been physically abusive with all of them, and sexually abusive with the two oldest daughters. During proceedings the molesting bastard father presented several letters of recommendations on his behalf to the court. One was a glowing recommendation from his Bishop.

In the end custody was awarded to the eldest daughter. After all was said and done I took great pleasure in writing this letter to that Bishop. Enjoy.


Bishop John XXXXXX,

This letter is to inform you that the guardianship for the children of (*Molester*) and (*My Sweetie*) has rightfully been awarded to the eldest daughter, (*Molester’s victim*).  The time spent and costs incurred in the effort to secure the children from their deviant father was worth any and all resources required.

Imagine my disappointment though as I read the report of the comments you made to the court appointed social worker.  Your glowing support of an abusive child molesting bastard is despicable.  Your further characterization of the children’s mother in the report as being “very influential in the formulation of the minor’s negative opinion about (*Molester*)” is downright sickening.  Let’s not consider the FACT that (*Molester*) was physically and verbally abusive to his children, or the FACT that they witnessed his abuse of their mother, or the FACT that he mounted their sister when she was 12 years old and ejaculated through his garments on her!!  Such events could NEVER have influenced their opinion of him.  Nooooooo, they were influenced by their mother!!  You really are a piece of work (*Biishop’s last name*).

(*My Sweetie*) desperately reached out to you for help in dealing with her sick ex-husband.  Her studies and research in Psychology greatly helped her recognize the controlling, manipulative behavior he was exhibiting.  She also realized that the ONLY  authority he would respond to in complying with his obligations would be the church…YOU!!.  This is why she sent you studies, articles, and paperwork detailing his deviant patterns so that you would be better informed and educated when dealing with him.  Obviously you considered this a nuisance, obviously you didn’t read the material, and obviously you chose to support the abusive child molesting priesthood holder over his victims.  This comes as no surprise as this seems to be a growing epidemic in the church.

Fortunately the State of California has expert psychologists who rely on sophisticated tests for character evaluation.  These tests administered to (*Molester*) were far more accurate than your faulty “Spirit of Discernment”.  Amazingly, the test results mirrored EXACTLY the types of behavior that (*My Sweetie*) warned you still existed in him.  Perhaps she was more “in tune with the spirit” than you. According to the test results “(*Molester*) presented as narcissistic and self-centered to enhance his sense of self-worth.  Prone to impulsivity and taking risks, he was vulnerable to poor judgement to gratify immediate needs, showing the tendency to be manipulative.  He also appeared to displace responsibility for his problems onto others.”  The test further concluded that “granting (*Molester*) parental rights would be psychologically detrimental to (the children).”

It is simply appalling that you would ignore the impassioned pleas for help from a loving protective mother in favor of the lies of a child molester.  I truly hope that if your daughters someday need the same assistance from a church leader as (*My Sweetie*) did, they will find someone more sympathetic to their needs than you.  And you are a Bishop!!??  One of the “Lord’s anointed”??  If you had any shred of decency you would resign immediately and give up the charade of being “led by the spirit”.

(*Molester*) saw you as someone he could deceive and manipulate.  (*My Sweetie*) saw you as a light of hope in dealing with him.  He was right, she was wrong.  I think you have a pretty good idea of how I see you.

Thanks for nothing.

Mr. Happy


After sending the letter I was somewhat expecting to be contacted by this Bishop or the church. I was looking forward to going off on either one of them again. Instead...not a peep.

I'd say "unbelievable," but know that it's not!
Those kids are lucky to have you in their lives.

Oh, and no surprise that you never heard from the bishop

That is hard to say. I have encountered so many. From a power tripping EQP through bishops even to SPs and mission presidents. There seems to be no limit to who can be a jerk and sometimes it appears that they are all vying for the biggest jerk title.

Marion D. Hanks, a Seventy who desperately wanted to be an apostle and never quite made it.

He was such a prissy, conceited, self-righteous, self-absorbed crybaby. Absolutely nothing like Jesus when he got like that. And he wasn't always like that, either.

Where the hell do they find those people?

I'm a female BIC. For many years, I was a divorced working mother. The biggest jerk at church? So many choices, so little time to write about them all. I'll mention the bishop's family. Their name is not Christensen.

The bishop, an ugly, slimy little guy, tried to put moves on me, in his office, saying that he was lonely, and "just enduring to the end" in his marriage.

I had already had an encounter with the bishop's wife, who made a point to come over to my house to tell me in person that her daughter could not play at my house, because "there's no priesthood in the home."

Their daughter who was my daughter's age, took a LOADED gun to high school, and threatened to kill herself. Because of the bishop's wealth and clout in the neighborhood, this girl wasn't punished at all!

The worst person would be the bishop's ugly high school senior son, who molested my little pre-teen girl at a church campout. She screamed, and a lot of kids saw what was happening, but the bishop told them to not tell.

In fact, the bishop was promoted to temple president, mission president, and is now in the General Authority "Seventies."

On that list would be Boyd K. Packer, for personal reasons, as well as church reasons.

The member of the Stake Presidency who seduced my neighbor's son's young wife. My neighbor and wife were called away to be a mission president, so the son, wife, and their two toddlers moved in to their house for three years. The son came home early one day, and caught his wife in bed with the Stake Counselor. Everybody got divorced, and the Stake guy married the young wife, but cheated on her, so they divorced and married other people, but then they got back together and re-married, but cheated again, and got divorced and married two new people. Before the seduction, this same Stake guy tried to put moves on married friend of mine, in a Stake interview, in his office. My friend and I found out that he was immoral in college, and he got his wife pregnant, before they were married.

Let me add the KNOWN pedophile, who would spank the kids in his primary class. A few of us parents did some research of old newspaper articles about him, and took photocopies to the bishop and the Primary president, and they finally released him. A year later, our ward got a new bishop and a new Primary president, and the pedophile was called to teach in the Primary again. He would have "overnights" with the boys and girls in the Primary class, at his house, and they would rehearse dances, and make costumes--and the parents would let him do this! The last time (I hope it was the last), when the parents went to pick up their children, they couldn't get anyone to answer the door. They could hear scurrying and whispering, but no answer, until they finally called the police.

These are just a few of the jerks in our ward, which is in a "respectable" neighborhood. (Well, at least the non- and ex-Mormons are respectable.) Their children had lots of money to spend on drugs and alcohol, and lots of unsupervised free time to get into trouble.

When we became inactive, we were harassed, threatened, stalked, maligned, and shunned--but all that is just Mormon SOP. It never has been as bad as when we were members, however.

Paulk sums it up:

"...just a jerk way to react for someone who was ostensibly on the "same team."

I think that it is impossible to just name one jerk. Everything everybody has stated pretty much seems to be par for the course.

When I was at Snow College, a devoutly TBM girl that I had asked to go to a dance tracked me down to tell me that she couldn't go out with me because she had "found out" that I had not gone on a mission. I reminded her that it was just a dance and I was not proposing marriage, she replied that she treated every date as a potential marriage proposal. I probably dodged a bullet on that one.

The Bishop that made my parents pay 20% tithing for two years after they submitted their tax returns at his request at a tithing settlement. He felt they had not been fully accurate in paying their tithing.

Every Mormon that felt a need to tattle on others, although they were raised to do that crap. Several missionaries in my parents ward crossed a street to take pictures of a historical building. The street happened to be the boundary of another mission and so somebody felt inclined to drop a dime on them.

All the nitpicky bullshit and more....Like every post in this thread. I could type all day.

but on the other hand, I have known a lot of people who I really did admire....

The biggest jerks were the biggest hypocrites. Some were converts, some BIC.

It was the people who convinced me the church wasn't true, before I ever discovered the truth about the early church history.

It was too damned evil to be of God, once I saw its underside exposed for the evil that it was/is.

That screamed cult louder to me than the other findings did, years later.

I think I might know this Christenson person. He was the Stake president where I grew up for six or seven years, and his wife was the Seminary teacher. He was pretty wealthy. He had about nine kids, I think. They'd be in their mid-sixties, and their oldest kids would be in their mid-forties ( I wonder if that is the Christensen you guys are referring to?). He was the mission president of the Monterrey, Mexico Mission, and is now the temple president the closest Temple to that mission. Before all of this, he was the Human Resources Director for the entire church. I believe he was also either a bishop or a stake president in Boston, Massachusetts. I bet he new Mitt Romney

I always liked him, though, and thought he was a nice guy. In addition to being the stake president, he was in our Ward, so I knew him and his family pretty well. He had grown kids that moved close to home, and they were some of my quorum leaders and they were also really nice and stuff.

But Christensen might be a common Mormon name, who knows.

The biggest jerk was my teachers Quorum advisor by far. He dragged me out of class once for some bizarre, minor infraction. Made my 'misbehavior' out to be an indicator of my life going downhill and me eventually becoming a failure. He had a habit of doing the strangest things. Like, I was teasing this other kid in our Quorum, very good-naturedly, we were both friends and stuff, and he heard what I said and immediately forced everyone to stop talking and made me apologize to him. He would do stuff like that all the time. He used to be Bishop in his old Ward, and I think being a mere teachers Quorum advisor Made him power trip big time.

He was universally disliked, too. I heard he had some kind of falling out with his son because they didn't like the woman he married. Said son ended up marrying a woman who was like a decade older than him, and I think to this day they have still never spoken to each other. He's that kind of dick.

I think his name is Burke.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 02/05/2017 10:01AM by midwestanon.

My transit through Mormonism was blessedly short (far less than a year) and most of my memories have faded away - but I do remember Brother Y. He was a tall, thin, pinched-face Mormon, who looked to be wound tighter than a clock spring. Brother Y. was a gynecologist, and was infamous among the women of the ward for opining, "women were made to suffer."

Imagine being female, in the stirrups, undergoing the attentions of squeaky-voiced Brother Y.



I do hope he had no children ...



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/05/2017 10:42AM by 3X.

A bishop I had growing up in Holladay, Utah. He was a business professor at BYU and a huge ass. Even my TBM father thought he was blow hard who exaggerated stories and thought the devil was behind every rock. In 1981, I was 19 and had already made my decision to not go on a mission. He marched down to my house one day with my completed mission papers in hand. When I told him I wouldn't sign he accused me of being addicted to masturbation and that I had murdered hundreds of babies by jacking off.

I never went on a mission. He was released after only two years as bishop because of all the batshit crazy stunts he would pull like cancelling sunday school so fast and testimony meeting could be two hours.

He died a year after being released.

D.A.B. (duck all balls).

AFTER seeing the video a few years ago of him 'breaching a lesson' to young children, and humiliating, and punishing, and molesting that young boy (for the example lesson of not reading his bs (bunk scriptures) enough, he came to town to (dis)appoint a new SP. He spoke of nothing but to say how he couldn't stay around afterward to be worshipped, but rather had to RUSH OFF to catch a plain, to be somewhere else. He wasn't even there (he was so FOOL of himself).

There are many, but checking out at an early age, and only returning to properly investigate a few years ago, and subsequently undunk myself, this jackass is what is most memorable.

I hated church but knew I had to pay tithing to get a good spot in the next life.
When I moved to SLC, I finally realized I had the right not to go to church, but I still felt like I should pay tithing. I put on my dress on certain Sundays, went and dropped my tithing check in the tithing box they had inside the nearest church, went back home and went and did something I wanted to do. I had someone (ward clerk?) call me once asking me why I was paying tithing to this ward, and where was my home ward. I said I guessed my old ward at Ricks College or maybe my small Idaho town ward. He said, "You young people move in and out and you expect me to keep track of you?" He was angry. I decided right then and there I would pay them no more tithing money.

It is FOR SURE not my family. ha ha ha FHE???? Only now and then when my mother nagged my dad long enough. My dad hated it as much as we did and it lasted about 15 minutes. Then my dad was back to watching TV (after working as a teacher and then farming in the evenings).

I have so many stories and I've told so many here before. The bishop who asked us young girls if we masturbated. I didn't even know what it meant. My cousin who was the bishop I got my TR from after going through hell with singles ward bishops and SP because my boyfriend/fiance was gay. I was the one who paid the biggest price for all this in terms of mormon leadership. Even after he cheated, left, etc., it is still my fault. It has been 20 years since he left me and I'm still at fault for not saving him.

Okay. I think this is the one who wins the prize. I had a really, really, really good friend I worked with for years. His last name was Christiansen . . . He gave me all kinds of "wise counsel" about marrying my gay husband and promised me my husband would never leave me, etc. After I found out my husband was cheating on me, I went to him to talk. He was a bishop by that time. He told me that if I had been giving my gay husband enough sex, he never would have cheated. (Never asked how much sex we did have as it was.) It took me years to finally realize who was at fault in this situation. It took me asking gays I've met here on RfM what they thought of this question to finally cut off all contact with this man who I used to admire, who I felt was my very dear friend.

I can't even begin to tell you what those damn leaders did to me over this issue.

BUT in the past few years, I've been thinking more about my childhood, teenage years, and I ask myself now WHAT TOOK ME SO LONG TO LEAVE? Even my ex told our TBM daughter, "You mother was NEVER happy mormon."



Edited 4 time(s). Last edit at 02/05/2017 05:10PM by cl2.

I met quite a few real jerks in the LDS church. But I guess there are two that stand out above/below all the rest.

1) My first mission companion. He insisted that since I was from a state in the American south I was unintelligent and not able to speak the local language. He had barely graduated high school and could hardly make himself understood in the language. I, however, had studied the language for five years and spent six months living in a country where it was spoken prior to going on a mission, and I had already acquired my first college degree. But the fact of my native locale was all he required to decide I was not on his level of intelligence. (And I am so grateful I never stooped that low!)


2) The bishop who refused to allow me to get help from the church welfare program unless I got rid of my cat. The fact that I had been mugged and robbed was, according to him, my fault for working for a non-Mormon employer and my punishment would be that I had to get rid of my pet.

That's so messed up.

I sort of did that. I had a neighbor heep the cat for a day so I could show that there was no pet in my home (the cat knew and liked the neighbor, so that was no problem) and the bishop saw to it that I got the help from the welfare program. Then I brought my cat home.

And it was shortly after that that I decided I couldn't even try to be LDS anymore.

The cat was with me for another 14 years.

EX Bishop Schweinehund and the Stake President SoB.
Brother Schweinehund stalked me (and this is mildly said), he harassed me. He send me awful mails, pictures and videos of himself, he wanted me to be "his other wife" for his "pleasure, he nearly destroyed me and my life, within a few weeks if his hormonterror - I was scared and full of anxiety because of this.

I eventually was courageous enough to speak up against him, to file a complaint at the police and I got a restraint order, he later was sentenced by court

SP SoB tried to make me feeling guilty about it, tried to talk me into taking it all back "to protect Bishop Schweinehund and his family, yes he even let me know that I am maybe a Dramaqueen, overreacting and an Attentionw**ore, who maybe is into the Bishop and things got out of control" but we still can solve this issue in a good way" he said. I played back one of the videos for SP SoB, where his apprentice enjoyed himself with a picture of me while talking disgusting things about me. "okay seems like we are having a problem here.... But we still can solve it discreet, can't we? If this goes public YOU will destroy his reputation and his family, what do you think how his kids will feel about it, when they find out what you (!!!!) and him had done"
yep evil me, who was somehow in the focus of a sexual predator, evil me who was just kind and nice to a guy I used to know forever and called my friend, before he went maniac. Who trusted this guy, not as a bishop, but as a friend of mine, who I had known since he came home from an student exchange where he converted. More than a decade. Dumb me, who never realized that he groomed me over the years.

His "excuse" was "I was afraid to lose you when I realized that it is a serious thing between you and your guy. I just didn't want to lose you because I love you. I'm sorry if I had offended and scared you somehow with my behavior, I was just afraid to lose you to him. Maybe I did it in the wrong way"

Well we had (of course) never ever any kind of a sexual relationship or more than a hug and a kiss to hello and goodbye on the cheek, like it is common among close friends, I was the confidant of his eldest daughter, she trusted me and told me all her little puberty secrets and asked me the things she didn't dare to ask her mother, she trusted me, now she is not longer allowed to contact me. She does anyway, secretly. All thrown under the bus because of this.

So these two Bstards have definitely won the "greatest jerks I've ever seen on this planet and Kolob" prize

My husband. When he is supposed to be the person who cherishes me despite my flaws. It all started with my lack of belief in the lds church which created a massive divide between us. And the bishop and church constantly fuelled it. The lds church does not put families first. Frankly i'd argue it puts them last and money first. Then devotion/loyalty to the rules without reason.

It is a toss up so I'll share my top few
1) Bitch RS president who sent me a letter telling me I shouldn't dwell on the negative (domestic violence and my kids being abused by my ex tbm eternal companion) despite not having enough food to eat, being so terrified of my ex, having traumatised kids I should not ask for welfare because I was not doing visiting teaching (5 kids, no money, no babysitter) She also barred me from stake sisters day because "nobody wants children there its a day for mums to rest from their children so the fathers can take care of the children" I asked if anybody would do service and babysit so I could go and she said its the fathers job. I reminded her my children were not safe with their father, she said thats how it works. I hated her. My bishop who gave me advice when I told him I was being abused by my ex and he told me I needed to bake an apple pie, put on a smile and a pretty dress, go to the temple with my abuser and tend his "needs". Then there was the bishop who stuck up for ex in court despite being fully aware of the abuse towards me and my children, although i should be thankful to him because that was a massive shelf item for me, I could go on, special mention to the bishop who threatened to tell the ward all that my ex had done to me, including rape because I needed to stop moaning about it and get a life...why did I stay so long again?

A bishop.

I was in college, not a minor, and he called my parents telling my non-Mormon parents what I should be doing.

I knew he was not "called of God" for anything.

Everybody has a story of an overreaching Church leader. This is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, after all.

In my opinion, High Councilors are the worst. They come into ward leadership meetings thinking they have authority over all.

When I was a ward clerk a High Councilor took it upon himself to order everyone present to subscribe to the Ensign. At the time our family Ensign had lapsed because I had been unemployed for ~6 months. I told him I would subscribe when finances permitted. He stated firmly that I wasn't worthy to hold such an important position without such a magazine. Fine. I stood and exited.

Another High Councilor berated Ward Council to commit to read the Book of Mormon that year. The Elders Quorum President said that he could not. Again, High Councilor demanded. Again, denied. After ~3 more iterations of this exchange the Relief Society President (EQ President's wife) interjects, "Don can't read!" She storms off.

I steadfastly refused to distribute LDS literature at my employment. During Ward Conference I voted against the person who insisted that I was obligated to do that.

When I was working full time and in graduate school I was only willing to attend the basic Church block. A bishop said that wasn't good enough. Fine. I didn't need those 3 hours of Church either.

Basically, when a leader fails when he assumes that everyone has similar circumstances.