I was extremely serious as a young man. I’m an Adult Child of an Alcoholic. Life was chaos. As is typical of ACOAs, I became the parent to my parent. Unfortunately, I didn’t have an adolescence. So, my inner child comes out with bad language, snarkiness, and phallic jokes. I doubt the 18 year old me would approve of the 60+ year old me!
My dad was one. My mom was addicted to prescription narcotics.
While they held temple recommends (from my early childhood up to their divorce ten years later,) my RM brother has told me he would find bottles of dad's stash hidden around the barnyard. Some in the haystack, or other hiding places he apparently didn't think us kids would find.
I had no idea he was drinking during those years. It was after their divorce he hit the bottle heavily. Then there was no hiding it.
I had a fun but rebellious adolescence. And I became the caretaker to my parents at some point along the way.
As crazy as my childhood was, it was unique. Not many children grow up on a farm that resembles a children's petting zoo. But my siblings and I did. We had a menagerie of farm and exotic animals. That was maybe the most stable time of my childhood, those years spent on our little farm. After parents divorced, it was to each their own.
Our 'forever' family unraveled at the seams.
All those Mormon teachings were a crock at that point. It couldn't save my parents from themselves.
Dad eventually got his life back on track, sans church.
Both went inactive after divorcing. In that sense they did their children a big favor.
We are kindred souls! My Mom was never in recovery and died of alcoholism. There’s always a secret in substance-abuse families. The secret is never to reveal to others the abuse in the family (kind of like the temple oaths:). It took many years of therapy to let go of what happened. I still remember, but the pain is gone. ((((Hugs to you, Amyjo!)))
She had never been easy to put up with, ever - Dad was the moderating influence in her life. She had a terrible temper, and I think we were allergic to each other. She always insisted that my first word was not "ma-ma" or "da-da." It was NO. And it is very likely that was true. We fought throughout my childhood.
Dad died from a terrible disease when I was 15. In her terrible grief, (I truly believe that Dad was the only person Mother ever loved) mother began drinking HEAVILY, having stopped at the liquor store on the way home from work.
It was awful, listening to her voice get more and more slurred. And she would repeat herself ad nauseam. I was SO grateful when I could leave and go to an "away" university.
She got herself fired from her long-time job as the director of nursing at a local hospital. She came home angry at something the administrator had said or done. She got tanked up, called him at home, and told him, in gloriously full drunk mode, just what she thought of him. I remember thinking, listening to her, that this was not going to end well.
She found her letter of termination waiting when she got to work the next day. And she honestly didn't seem to know what the problem was. Maybe she didn't remember what she had said, while drunk. I don't know.
She was an excellent nurse, and never drank on the job. It was after she got home, after stopping at the liquor store, that she would get roaring drunk. And she never, ever, got hung over. She had a fairly vile personality anyway, and the alcohol did not make it a bit nicer.
If people are funny then they might laugh. Laughter is good if it's low, medium, or super loud. But when it's in-between medium and super loud then it's a super grievous sin that makes the hosts of heaven tremble and causes each of us honest TBM's to weep uncontrollably over the gross sinful covenant breaking wickedness that such laughter could cause. I have wondered why it's such a sim to laugh at certain decibel levels but as I have little time for wondering, I.e. Marvelous duties in the church such as chapel cleaning leave no time for deep thought, I did not get far. Personally I tend to laugh when I see people dressed up like clowns. And sometimes I need to be super serious without any laughter, such as when I am In an endowment session looking at how normal and mainstream everyone is dressed during the middle of the session and such a scene is so solemn and free of things like laughter as a result of all the normal looking attire.
"Personally I tend to laugh when I see people dressed up like clowns. And sometimes I need to be super serious without any laughter, such as when I am In an endowment session looking at how normal and mainstream everyone is dressed during the middle of the session and such a scene is so solemn and free of things like laughter as a result of all the normal looking attire."
Bit of an aside - Since it is now generally accepted that the fear of clowns is a thing (coulrophobia), and not just a comic meme; do you think it was Joseph Smith's intent to use the endowments as a means of putting the fear of God into his followers?
Boner is king and that is my final statement. But others are close seconds like old dog or even babylon. Hie is the smartest probably. There are a lot of compassionate women as well that know their stuff also. As for me i am the wild child haha but i try to be funny if i can.