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Posted by: oh well ( )
Date: January 20, 2018 01:06PM

I watched the so-called press conference.

What a parade of insanity it was.

I am so embarrassed that I still a member. I am ready to quit in almost every way. I just need to find a good family law attorney, a bankruptcy attorney, and a Rx for Prozac. I'm not kidding.

How did it come to this?

Wish me luck.

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Posted by: cricket ( )
Date: January 20, 2018 01:28PM


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Posted by: BYU Boner ( )
Date: January 20, 2018 01:33PM

Welcome to the board. Finally figuring out the lies and manipulation of the Mormon Church can be overwhelming; but, it will become liberating. My initial reaction was anger, hurt, and frustration, but it become easier once the boil was lanced and the pus was finally out.

Start with one thing at a time. If you’re struggling with depression, find a non-Mormon mental health provider who can help you sort things out. Then, add a lawyer.

As you move forward, feeling may flair up regarding hurt and deceit. Eventually, you’ll feel liberated. Your life will be your life without interferrence from a cult. Very best wishes!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/20/2018 01:36PM by BYU Boner.

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Posted by: Aquarius123 ( )
Date: January 20, 2018 01:37PM

Op, we're here for you. The exit is painful, but oh so worth it.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/20/2018 01:38PM by Aquarius123.

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Posted by: smirkorama ( )
Date: January 20, 2018 02:32PM

Aquarius123 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Op, we're here for you. The exit is painful,

but not nearly as painful as staying in


> but
> oh so worth it.

based so much on staying in being oh so NOT worth it

.....or a person can do like me, and faithFOOLy stay in so bitterly far past the point of any reason that finally breaking out /breaking free is like the best thing ever !!!!

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Posted by: oh well ( )
Date: January 20, 2018 01:45PM

However, the church has a way of entangling every part of life. I anticipate that once I tug on the first thread, things will start to unravel quickly.

As for depression, I have had trouble finding a real therapist. So far I have not been too impressed.

I can handle being angry and feeling STUPID, but I wish I could concentrate for more than five minutes.

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Posted by: smirkorama ( )
Date: January 20, 2018 02:43PM

oh well Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> However, the church has a way of entangling every
> part of life.

you have been able to concentrate enough to get that quite correct

> I anticipate that once I tug on the
> first thread, things will start to unravel
> quickly.

with you speaking like that, they already have! you are already ( ALREADY) in the territory where my MORmON enforcement agent male parent could see fit to issue some death threats/ wishes of demise to you, just like as suggested in the temple ceremony for dissenters and the unfaithful.


> As for depression, I have had trouble finding a
> real therapist. So far I have not been too
> impressed.
>
> I can handle being angry and feeling STUPID, but I
> wish I could concentrate for more than five
> minutes.

my MORmON girl friend was good for as much as 18 seconds with her MORmON attention span

for most people, that condition remarkably improves after a while of leaving behind the constant unqualified ingestion of insane MORmON based garbage

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Posted by: Badassadam1 ( )
Date: January 20, 2018 05:06PM

Yes i agree that your concentration will improve the farther away you get from the organization. You will even become smarter and your logical mind will return a little bit. Fantasy land will dissipate. Nobody thought the badass would improve at first, not even i did, but i think i have gained some traction and more direction for sure. My confidence is higher.

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Posted by: lazylizard ( )
Date: January 20, 2018 05:06PM

oh well Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> However, the church has a way of entangling every
> part of life. I anticipate that once I tug on the
> first thread, things will start to unravel
> quickly.
>
> As for depression, I have had trouble finding a
> real therapist. So far I have not been too
> impressed.
>
> I can handle being angry and feeling STUPID, but I
> wish I could concentrate for more than five
> minutes.

Might I suggest easy beginner yoga and meditation? It helps wonders for relaxing.

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Posted by: notmonotloggedin ( )
Date: January 22, 2018 09:22PM

I found this to be true and have never forgotten it.

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Posted by: Anonomo ( )
Date: January 25, 2018 05:04PM

It takes time to find the right therapist, even when religion isn't a factor. Keep looking. I found a great one through her website because she referenced issues that concerned me. If you don't like who you've got, you don't have to go back.

Just keep trying, because taking care of yourself is about to get really, really important.

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Posted by: Dorothy ( )
Date: January 20, 2018 03:20PM

A great counselor is VERY hard to find. A decent antidepressant is usually a little easier.

I cannot imagine facing job loss or divorce as a result of acknowledging the truth.

Wishing you peace on your journey.

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Posted by: oh well ( )
Date: January 21, 2018 10:30AM

Would I go to a regular doctor for that?

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Posted by: Levi ( )
Date: January 21, 2018 10:39AM

Yes. Your GP can do it in 5 minutes

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Posted by: Dorothy ( )
Date: January 21, 2018 11:49AM

Most GPs are very comfortable prescribing an SSRI like Proszac or Zoloft. There are lots of valid arguments to take antidepressants and to not take them. My first counselor said we could do therapy for years and I’d understand my depression better. When they work, the meds really are magic.

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Posted by: oh well ( )
Date: January 21, 2018 12:49PM

I appreciate the info. I need something to change fast.

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Posted by: Dorothy ( )
Date: January 21, 2018 02:13PM

SSRIs are not very fast--darn it. They take a solid month to kick in. Sometimes the hope of knowing change is in the works is a mood lifter. You've heard of rose colored glasses. When they worked for me is was like lifting off the sh*t smeared glasses.

All the best to you.

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Posted by: Anonomo ( )
Date: January 25, 2018 05:06PM

It took me about five weeks to notice I felt better after starting Lexapro. Talk to your doctor. It doesn't fix everything, but having a better baseline can really help you.

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Posted by: vigilant ( )
Date: January 20, 2018 03:47PM

I QUIT IN 1983. tHE SENSE OF RELIEF WS OVERWHELMING AT THE TIME. iT WAS THE best decision of my life. RIGHT decision I have never looked back. I did not need a lawyer, or accountant etc. just a shrink asking me how I was so stupid and deceived to join in the first place

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Posted by: smirkorama ( )
Date: January 21, 2018 12:30PM

looking back, IF I had it to do again, I would give my left nut to have been able to exit in 1983 (in my early 20 's) instead of waiting til 1998

I was so close to exiting in '83, even as my super @$$ hole MORmON enforcement agent male parent was expressing his longing for my demise over my expressing displeasure over "my" missionary experience -something that I am STILL paying for !!!! and yet that still was not enough to push me out. One thing is for sure, I will NEVER go back !!!!!! I would rather die!

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Posted by: vigilant ( )
Date: January 24, 2018 09:48AM

I am sure it is hard looking back at two years and realize that in this lifetime that the two years will never be returned. I quit in 1983 and am still bitter over the total experience and I only gave time and money, not my life

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Posted by: smirkorama ( )
Date: January 28, 2018 06:13AM

Yes, the time of a FOOL time MORmON mission is two years. However, it can take MUCH MUCH longer than that to regain the academic, financial, employment and career momentum that is lost during those two years by going on a mission. IF ONLY that was just two years !!!!!!

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Posted by: Badassadam1 ( )
Date: January 20, 2018 05:01PM

I wish you luck my friend. It is a hard road at first but it will be worth it in the end. I might be filing for banktrupcy in the future as well but as long as i get out of the organizations tentacles completely then it will all be worth it and i will have a chance at a real life. I would suggest you get non-religiouscounselors as well.

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Posted by: Babyloncansuckit ( )
Date: January 21, 2018 10:55AM

How can you say that? These men are the best the Lord has to offer. The cream of the crop. Look at Eyring, the next step in human evolution. He’s so efficient that his screen saver face activates even during news conferences. And the mental dexterity of Nelson, heck I’ll bet he can beat most 93 year olds at checkers. Oaks is strong and sturdy, just like a real oak. He doesn’t bend. You’ll never see him apologize, never see him reverse the November policy. Because if he does that, “they win”.

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Posted by: oh well ( )
Date: January 21, 2018 12:54PM

It's hard to know if they are the master minds or if they become the victims. They really seem like robots to me.

Is it possible for Eyring to talk without almost crying?

Can Nelson answer a softball question without a condescending quip or personal observation?

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Posted by: smirkorama ( )
Date: January 21, 2018 12:22PM

WHY ? ....the MORmON church has never had a major PR bungle yet!!!!! just ask a MORmON about that.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8wALvdgurB4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YEMX0VooD4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=chkSWt3KiMY

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Posted by: Mother Who Knows ( )
Date: January 22, 2018 04:31AM

"Oh well", you are on the right track. I was a single divorced (and abandoned) mother, and very frightened of poverty for me and my dear children. When we were members, my children and I were threatened with being alone forever, separated from our family, and that we would "pass by each other as strangers" for eternity. My Primary children were threatened that they would burn in the second coming, if they did not pay their tithing (on babysitting and paper route money. Real life was scary enough--why make everything worse? After my children and I became inactive, and found out about the lies, and formally resigned, life became gentler, friendlier, and we found love all around us!

When we first became inactive, my fears of abandonment and helplessness were made worse, because all the Mormons in our neighborhood ward shunned me. So did my TBM relatives (though we weren't close, anyway.)

I had what I called "Sunday depression" after my divorce, and the day I walked out of that church for the last time, the depression vanished forever! (I get sad like normal people, but I was never again debilitated and hopeless and oppressed, like I was when I was a Mormon.

I finally "woke up" and realize that the Mormons had never "supported" me and my children. They had never given us unconditional love, because they don't believe in it.

Instead, I have a "professional" support system! The educators who taught me and helped me get my degrees and training for my career, the various people who hired me and my children, doctors, nurses, instacare and ER, fire fighters, police, veterinarians, and RFM! My pets offered me more comfort than any VT's or HT's. A visit to the corner drug store, a question answered by the pharmacist, some cough drops or Advil or a just a roll of life savers worked better for me than any priesthood blessing. When I made enough money, I paid for a good psychiatrist, for help with PTSD flashbacks, anxiety, nightmares, etc.

I asked the psychiatrist for an antidepressant, but what I needed was a tranquilizer (about once a month, if yoga breathing did not help) for anxiety and fear. I never needed an antidepressant, at all. It's best to get a diagnosis from your GP, before he prescribes an antidepressant. If one drug doesn't work, ask if you can try another, and another, until you find something that helps. Don't be discouraged.

Your self-esteem will return, as you learn how the Mormon cult-of-hate has undermined even your love of self. Learning the Truth, and following your heart, is like walking out from a cold cave and into the warm sunshine! It's a brighter world!

Most of the people on RFM will tell you that they are much happier out of the cult!

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Posted by: Honest TBM ( )
Date: January 22, 2018 05:00AM

When I was a small child in Primary I learned in Nursery that the Cheerios were true and thus began the foundations of my life direction being programmed by the beloved LDS Correlation department. I learned to obey the Brethren unquestionably and was wondrously prepared to devote my life to building up this most peculiar enterprise. I know the pesky anti-Mormons tend to criticize the Church because they don't think it's a true Church. But such a question of whether or not the Church is true is so easy to answer when you carefully analyze whether or not the Church leadership is completely honest, transparent, and truthful about their history, doctrines, finances, statistics, and everything. Even the slightest bit of non-forthrightness could cause people to have Doubts so it's obviously unthinkable for any leader, missionary, or member to ever suggest that any other course would be acceptable when we consider how important it is to be completely honest/transparent, or in other words, a True Church :)

The beloved Correlation department sure established a tapestry of curriculum to teach us what Love means. It means to obey the Brethren unquestionably. Thus I do not need to worry about the feelings of other people except in this context. That scripture "if you love me, keep my commandments" reminds me how Love is basically Obedience. Well how we obey is to unquestionably obey the middle management overlords, such as Bishops and Stake Presidents, that the Church puts into place to lovingly (I.e. Obedience) lead the Church where we live.

So what is this word "unconditional" doing with the word Love? How can there be Love without the church leaders controlling it all completely. You must be talking about some kind of Love that may not be approved by the Correlation department. I suppose I could explore this further. But I have limits on what topics I can explore because of how wondrously I have been programmed from the time I got my testimony of Cheerios to only think about ideas that are good for the Brethren's dominion and I am suspicious that your "unconditional love" idea may be unapproved because Love, like everything else, is supposed to always be subject to the "obey the Brethren" condition.

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Posted by: emmahailyes ( )
Date: January 22, 2018 08:14PM

When I first started voicing my doubts about 8 years ago I was terrified. My husband was so disappointed but my adult children were so relieved. They opted out of anything LDS as soon as they left Dad's influence. It was hard at first, shedding my garments, losing longtime friends, and my husband's disapproval.
The whole Mormon thing has gotten so stupid and crazy in the last couple of years that I can't believe I was ever part of such a moronic cult. Even my husband has stopped defending the insanity of Mormonism.

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Posted by: oh well ( )
Date: January 23, 2018 02:32PM

It sounds like things are better with your husband. Not to get too personal, but are you happy?

Most aspects of the relationship with my wife are great. Our only real struggle is with how I feel about the church. I understand that things will change when I quit the church, but the feeling I get is that things will never be the same again between my wife and me. I really hate that.

How do you deal with the loss?

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Posted by: emmahailyes ( )
Date: January 24, 2018 10:51PM

This is evil to say, but I think there was a lot more to my husbands membership than faith. He is a narcissist and the cult loves male narcissist. He got to make me feel LESS if I could'nt come up with tithing or complained about his absence to all those Priesthood meetings. He is very charismatic so he held all the higher level ward callings. He loved that.
It was a tug of war for a while. There was a lot of quiet shaming coming my way. A couple years later he accepted a counselor position in the Bishopric. We were retired and I was planning some trips with friends which I had to give up. I was livid. But there is karma, he had a stroke soon after and had to give up even church attendance. He couldn't drive so I agreed to take him one Sunday a month for sacrament only. I'm the captain of the ship now.
He soon gave up any attendance as the cult has little use for old disabled people of any gender.

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Posted by: edzachery ( )
Date: January 25, 2018 09:09AM

emmahailyes Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
> ...the cult
> has little use for old disabled people of any
> gender.

BOOM!!! NAILED IT!!!

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Posted by: lazylizard ( )
Date: January 26, 2018 01:59PM

edzachery Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> emmahailyes Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> >
> > ...the cult
> > has little use for old disabled people of any
> > gender.
>
> BOOM!!! NAILED IT!!!


I honestly wish this site hada liking system. I love this!

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Posted by: munchybotazv2 ( )
Date: January 27, 2018 06:07AM

so that I could get up to speed on the Council of Ancient Doddering Con Men and waste a little over an hour watching not just their press conference, but the broadcast that preceded it. Imagine my annoyance after 18 minutes of the latter, finding out it wasn't the actual press conference. Gah! Curiosity gets me every time. Good thing I was already up in the night!

As always, while watching, I marveled at how anyone could sit through this and think these guys are anything but ridiculous and creepy. I suppose I'd feel embarrassed, too, if I were still a member.

What really struck me is how little has changed, other than the technology and the world around these three old goobers. It could just as easily have been Kimball, Romney, and whoever was the other one back in 1974, when I was dragged to church at age 13.

Good grief, the redundant phrases! I'm guessing the covenant path is about to get old fast, if it wasn't already.

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