The moment when I realized that the LDS church preaches but does not practice forgiveness has arrived:

Baptized, excommunicated, re-baptized in 2014. Temple privileges restored in 2015.

We have a new BP this month. He asked about my excom. I told him why I was exed. He wasn't the BP that I had when I was going through the repentance process and baptism. According to him, I lack remorse for my past conduct involving my excom. Um.... no. I was cleared by my previous BP, SP, and the FP for rebaptism and the restoration of my temple privileges. ALL of that had been taken care of a few years ago.

I recall a scripture stating that once you are forgiven of your sins, "I the Lord remember them no more." And the reason I am still being taxed by a mortal for my past is???????

Yes, they certainly don't practice it.

The thing is, I'm not sure they preach it, either.
Actual "forgiveness" is not the same as, "If you do something we don't like, and jump through all our hoops, we may restore your church status -- but we'll never, ever forget what an evil sinner you are!"

:(

This.

There is a difference. The church has a long memory.

So far I have not been called to serve in any callings that require a TR nor to speak in sacrament meetings. I have a non-TR-required calling which I like actually.

Except, they will always allow you to pay tithing.

"Licked cupcakes"

"Licked cupcake? I fuckin' nailed that cupcake!!"

--Judic West, Duke of Erin go Bragh

Atonement

Curious why you stay? On what basis does new bishop discern your lack of remorse? Do you have a spouse or ex-spouse in the ward that may be poisoning his opinion? Frankly I have never heard of such action once issues have been settled by a previous regime....

Gatorman

If you want forgiveness, I'd look for a Christian church. The LDS Church is not Christian -- it's the brainchild of a horny charlatan.

It sounds like they’re the ones without remorse. This is the church that never apologizes. Maybe you’re ready to see the church the way it is.

Well, once you realize that most bishops are like a 5 year old and they make up whatever rules they like as they go along...you know...like Joseph made up the church thing, then it makes sense.

It is all make believe.

-tig

Atonement--

I assume you are female, because your bishop is disrespecting you!

I was a single divorced working mother, and a couple of my bishops were obsessed about my sex life, or lack of it, and thought I was lying about it. Did your new bishop seem to enjoy his private interview with you, behind the closed door?

I speak from experience, and from the experiences of many other women in Mormonism.

Regardless of the bad behavior of the leaders, I challenge you to gather more factual information about the cult you are in. True forgiveness, unconditional love (or any other kind of love), Christ, equal treatment for rich and poor, married and unmarried, friends and relatives of GA's as opposed to members who come from "nothing, converts and BIC's, or formerly excommunicated members vs. perfectly obedient members--you won't find any of that in the Mormon cult.

Why do you expect Mormons to forgive you? Mormons won't forgive the innocent adopted child of gay parents. They won't forgive anyone who is wonderful and genuine, but who decides to leave Mormonism. Most of us ex-Mormons continue to be maligned, harassed, and shunned.

Forgiveness is between you and God and the person or people you hurt. The bishop--a stranger--has nothing to do with it. He is not ordained or trained as a clergyman or counselor. "The Priesthood" is not from God, at all, and it grants no man any authority over you. Your bishop has no authority with God, either. Think about that. Your bishop has no real power over you. Ignore him. Politely evade meeting with him. Pray, make peace directly with those you have hurt, and forgive yourself, and move on! You are so much MORE than your mistakes.

hoping your next departure from the Morg will be by resignation at a time you control.

In Mormonism, it's really a miracle if you're ever forgiven.

Mormons always complain about exmormons not leaving the church alone. Yet how many times have we heard about Governor Boggs extermination order? Compare that number to the number of times the Mountain Meadow Massacre is discussed.

The Mormon church does not forgive. You have a permanent record that follows you wherever you go so that each new ward you're in or each new bishop called has access to your past "sins."

When I was a member I never felt good about myself even though I was a "good" girl. I always felt like a sinner because of those damned interviews with the bishop and all those talks in church when we were told to try harder, do more, be perfect.

I loved teaching the atonement lesson on my mission, when we happily told investigators that because Jesus loved us and died for us, we would be forgiven. I believed this of others but not of myself. I think most missionaries felt the same way, growing up in an unforgiving church. An Elder in my mission was sent home early after a court of love. It was so full of love and forgiveness that he went home and blew his brains out. That's how loving and forgiving the Mormon church is. Not a day goes by that I don't think about that young man.

I made out with my boyfriend without going "too far" or removing my clothes. It was enough though for the bishop to make me feel like I committed a horrible crime and instructed me not to take the sacrament for a month, and to read the most unforgiving book ever written: The Miracle of Forgiveness. That book made me feel hopeless.

The Mormon church does not forgive, ever!

According to one Mormon scripture, your sins are forgiven and it's as if they never happened. But another Mormon scripture says that if you sin again, all your past sins are heaped upon you again. So it's as if the heavenly (and earthly) record keepers never actually wipe your records clean. They just hold them in your file for future use.

Mormons ALWAYS forget - selectively - as they NEVER forget.

"I the Lord remember them no more". I hope you told him that!

M@t

Don't go to any more bishop's interviews.

In fact,find a new church that does not stick its nose into your private life.

Curious if you considered even for a second telling the bishop its none of his business when asked about past "sins?"

Gosh Bish, that was forgiven and forgotten long ago. I don't even remember what it was all about.

Jane, TBMs are groomed from a very young age to answer all questions asked by the bishop or other church leaders. I revealed the most embarrassing things during interviews with the bishop - things I would never even tell my very best friends. Even today I share way too much of myself when asked by never-mo managers or others who have authority over me. I'm way too honest in job interviews. As a Mormon, I was conditioned to tell all to church leaders from the age of 12. It's impossible for you to understand unless you grew up in the Mormon church, especially before the internet came along.

Yes, but it's never too late to start a new habit.

Easier said than done... Mormon brainwashing/conditioning isn't so easy to escape. It's kind of like telling anyone who is suffering from PTSD to just snap out of it. It's not so easy.

Summer, as I recall you are a never-mo, correct? Maybe it's not so easy for you to understand since you did not grow up in the Mormon church.

I do get it to the extent that I can. I'm just saying -- *next* time, try to make it go differently. Practice in front of a mirror if you need to.

It also helps in any situation if you have responses already prepared and ready to go --

"That was already resolved by bishop so-and-so, and I'm simply not going to go there. You may choose to, but I won't."
"Let me consult my spouse and get back to you."
"Let me pray about that and get back to you."
"I'm not responding to that."

etc.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/26/2018 05:29AM by summer.

Whenever I am tempted to go back to the LDS Church to make my family happy, I read stories like this and realize there really is no going back. I resigned several years ago and don't feel it is worth jumping through their hoops to please my family.

lip service, grudgingly.

That's All