So, I'm single and trying to find a great woman...which is already a tough go in and of itself. But trying to meet a great gal who is not so entrenched in mormonism is difficult while living within the shadows of the everlasting hills.

Its a big turnoff as you meet a woman and even prior to the first date she starts with the subtle probing questions to measure you up. "So, do you watch rated R movies?" or, "what ward do you attend?"

Its like you have to go through a temple recommend interview just to date them. Then, when you don't measure up spiritually speaking, you are discarded like a piece of trash. I'm sure that is precisely how the big guy upstairs would want it. Mormon women would gladly throw away a decent, honest man if he is not a "worthy" or active member. And yet, they'll get abused and taken advantage of by men that are shadow members who put on a facade of righteousness, yet they are completely two faced and deceptive. I've seen numerous mormon women fall for this scheme and get a shotgun marriage only to have it blow up in about 3 months when the true colors come out.

"Measure thou thy man and if he doth not measure up, then he shall be castaway and trodden underfoot" Pretty sure this is a scripture in the BOM, or D&C where this is taught. Or is it the BOA?? Hmmmm...

Be the one who does the winnowing! First thing out of the box, ask a prospective date what her favorite position is and for her views on oral sex!

And then if you don't like her answers, tell her that she didn't pass the interview!

Excellent, however, i think that still might shock the conscience of many women, even outside of mormonism, but it may be worth a go.

I'm horny

BYU Boner, please do not use a sock puppet to announce something that clearly is common knowledge.

Are you dating Mormon women exclusively?

If you are not Mormon (you are either exmo or nevermo), wouldn't it make a great deal more sense to date either exmos or nevermos?

P.S. My S.O. grew up in Alaska (his parents, who were both originally from the upper Midwest, moved to Alaska when he was an infant). I have learned that Alaskan men can have an enormous inventory of interesting stories about Alaska, that they can be immensely practical when it comes to things like fixing toilets and constructing, or reconstructing, things like book shelving units, and they can be immensely lovable, too!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/09/2018 08:44PM by Tevai.

No, i am not dating mormon women exclusively, i am dating women of all faiths and beliefs. However, in Utah, there are an awful lot of single LDS women on the market. I don't rule them out as some state that they are "open minded", but then when they find out you have left the faith, they tend to clam up. Others are great, that are on the fence about the church or already have left....Its a little difficult sorting it all out when you don't know where they fall on the LDS spectrum.

I didn't grow up in Alaska, but spent a few years working there...its quite the place...lots of great memories and stories.

I was standing in line at UVU behind two women students. Student A was telling her friend about her date from the weekend. She said her date was polite, funny, smart (studying in a pre-engineering program) and they had a really fun time.

Nevermind all that, said her friend. The important thing is can be take you to the temple? If not, dump him.

Yep, automatic judgement and dismissal....just like the Lard wants it.

I could have taken mormon girls to the temple, even after I left the cult.

I couldn't (or, rather, wouldn't) take them IN the temple, or (Elohim forbid!) marry them in one, but TO the temple, sure...I had a car :)

NotLoggedin Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ...can be take you to the temple?
> If not, dump him.


In a mentally/emotionally/socially healthy world, one would spend time with a lot of people, and if there was someone they really connected with on many levels, someone they wanted to spend the rest of their life with, marriage would be one possible outcome. But in Mormonism (and other cultures) getting married (in the temple, of course) is the pre-established goal. Then it's a matter of finding someone to fill the role. Wanted: eternal companion. Unworthy candidates need not apply.

exactly, it's a rough way to find one as NotLoggedIn said. The standards are extremely high. The young girl is going to go after the pre-engineering boy rather than the guy who has a job. If your not considerably above average, what mormon girl would want to settle for less when she is suppose to be a Goddess? And of course take into account that she is looking for a fellow who physically resembles Justin Bieber or Nick Jonas (or whoever is popular these days).

The programming that goes on is really frightening.

My advice is to date to simply have fun with interesting females—not to find a “great woman.” Mormonism turns the pleasurable act of fun and friendship, though dating, into a pre-mating/marriage ritual.

Go out, have a good time, and repeat. Greatness is way over-rated! What you want is a woman who shares your values, humor, earthiness, and fun times. You and she will figure out where to go from there. The Great Boner.

Not enough has been said about the benefits of porn. Relationships with real people are complicated and expensive. There are so many potential people you could be unhappy with, but with porn there is little to no downside.

She loved to hang out in bars, but would complain that the only kind of guys you could pick up there were alcoholics.

I had to bite my lip every time she whined about this.

Date: "What ward are you in?" (Or other initial probing query)
Alaskawilde: "I'm in such-and-such ward." (Note: not, "I attend ward...") "How do you like your ward?"
Now start probing HER LDS credentials. If she has any problem with anybody/anything in her ward, ask her for details. Then use that as a springboard to discuss problems with LDS in general.

"I asked my bishop about why Moroni is cast as an angel, but now they call him a 'resurrected exalted being.' Strange. What do you think?"

Use questions like this to ascertain what kind of Mormon she is, and more importantly, what kind of thinker. You may have more in common than you realize. Suppose she's on LDS/matrimonial automatic pilot course, but has misgivings she hasn't wanted to confront? Share yours--go easy at first--see how she responds. Be Mormon-polite and respectful, i.e. you're the perfect LDS gentleman, just without the TR. Anything can happen.

Risk: she sees you as a spiritual rescue case, and wants to remedy your apostasy with her feminine spirituality. At some point, you have to level with her and let her know that your doubts & disbelief do outweigh any loyalties to or belief in LDS.

I wouldn't date a mormon woman ever again (even if I was dating again). Mormons in general have screwed-up ideas about sex and love. Mormon women tend to be owned by the men in their lives (father, bishop, over-protective brothers). Unless she is willing to leave the church immediately, move on.

Caution… even if she claims to be more "open-minded" there's still the matter of her own family. You may be diving head first into a wasp's nest of TBMs.

Oh, and the first time she probes whether you watch R-rated movies in such a way that screams "You BETTER not!" it's time to ask for the check. Walk away before she can reject you, so you can leave on your terms with your dignity intact.

I had a horrible time trying to date in mormonism. I was still devout and I started dating nonmormons,actually on the advice of my very TBM neighbor. BUT I was one of the girls who had to have that TM and I told them up front though. I knew they weren't in a ward, etc. For the most part, the nonmormons I dated treated me with much more respect than mormons ever did.

I never really believed any of them would convert and so I "let them go." It was a really tough thing for me to do. I waited another 5 years before I met my ex. Now I'm with the first nonmormon I ever dated. We've been together 13-1/2 years.

I would skip dating any mormon girl who is active mormon.

I have a TBM daughter working in Alaska for her 11th summer for Princess Cruises. She has loved working up there, but I kind of get the feeling this is her last year, but she has said that every year, so who knows.

Anyway, you are better off not dating any mormon girl. My son is 32 and he has 18 year old mormon girls asking him to take them out. It's tough to be a single mormon, but most aren't willing to leave or marry outside the temple.

On a bright note, they are showing you who they are and what they want right up front. But yeah, the numbers are not on their side. A certain percentage of Mormon women holding out for the righteous RM will never marry.

I'm actually SHOCKED at how many girls I know who are around my daughter's age who are not married. Many mormon guys aren't either. My boyfriend's realtor was the bishop of the singles ward here in Hyrum at the time my boyfriend was looking at homes and he said that the boys seem to be lost and do not know what to do with their lives. College educations are expensive and student loans don't help for a future, but they feel they need to earn enough to support a family while their wife stays home, so they feel overwhelmed. Many of these girls I know are college graduates and have VERY GOOD JOBS. But of course, they are supposed to stay home and raise kids. I know if my daughter does eventually get married (she is dating the guy I have wanted her to marry for 5 years) and has kids, she'll have to work just because she'll go NUTS staying home and I'll be babysitting, which I don't mind in terms of I wouldn't want my kids in daycare.

But a lot of the daughters of the girls I was friends with in the singles ward are not married. We all had great jobs, too, when we finally found someone, but then they are all still married!?!? We all know I'm "not."