Posted by:
exminion
(
)
Date: November 11, 2018 06:39PM
Welcome back. I remember you, too.
Don't feel guilty about your anger. Some posters on here talk about the "7 stages of loss", as in a death, and they apply it to leaving the Mormon cult. Well, I was stuck in the "Anger Stage" for about 4 years! Each time I would discover yet another Mormon lie, my anger would flare up all over again.
Maybe you will get tired of feeling angry--it is energy draining. Or, maybe you will finally come to the end of new Mormon lies to be discovered. (The problem with this is that the Mormons keep coming up with new lies, new history, new stupid rules, new scams.) Either way--you will become less angry.
About death and the hereafter.... As soon as I left the cult and discovered it was all a hoax, I immediately felt better about dying. Anything is better than the Joseph-Smith/Swedenberg version of the CK, the 3 degrees of glory, and eternal temple marriage! Even just "unconsciousness" would be better. The Mormon cult had me sealed for all eternity to my temple ex-husband, who beat me almost every day, for no reason. My children by my second husband were also claimed by the Mormon cult to be the wife-beater's eternal possessions. The thug was mentally ill, and he and his GA family kept that information from me and my family. For many of my years as a Mormon, that was the "heaven" that was waiting for me, and I was afraid of death!
As you seem to know already, nature can be a great comfort! It is actually my new "religion" if I had to claim any religion at all. Maybe it is enough to know that we are part of this Earth. As Carl Sagan says, "We are all made of the same star-stuff." We have this life that we know, on a planet that is sustaining us, for now.
It was a relief to cast off all those petty rules, the "shoulds", and the busywork, and the money-grabbing, and the social latter-day ladder climbing of the Mormon cult. I could breathe! Hike, fish (release), hug my loved ones, listen to music, have conversations, and watch the sunsets.
You seem to have found your own formulae for happiness. It's different for each individual! (Mormons claim to have a "one-size-fits-all plan for that.)
I have a feeling that if there is a spiritual "Hell", that most of us have already been there. I'm sorry about all the deaths,. There might be some rough days in your future, but no more "spiritual angst". All that garbage and the threats and fear all all made up! You are free! It will be interesting how your better life unfolds for you. I suspect your good relationships are already better, without Mormon interference. As for the toxic relationships--you might have to let them go. The beauty is that it is up to you to decide, and take charge of your life.