After a Temple marriage, is there a sexual guideline that one needs to followed?



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/15/2018 03:50AM by diversity.

Thank you for revising that.

Lot's Wife Wrote:
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> Thank you for revising that.


Yeah, thats a topic that should be spoken of because others should know just how repressive and controlling the mormon church is.

I never obeyed these commands/suggestions, what ever you want to call them but here they are in glorious technicolor.

As I recall, one of the things we were not suppose to do was kiss with tounges. What a mental snooze that would be. Also we were always to wear our garments. I'm sure there are more but I don't remember what they were. Any red blooded human being should run screaming when they heard these admonitions against good healthy sex.

I always thought that the old geezers who couldn't get it up made up thoses rules because they couldn't enjoy sex so why should anyone else. Right?

What, do you mean like Scrabble? I believe Monopoly has always been considered safe. Although there is a board game called 'My Little Factory', and according to one modern profit, this racy little number is to be kept firmly locked. Hope that's helpful. Regards esias

I googed and found this on this subject.

https://www.mormonmatters.org/the-mormon-therapist-on-appropriate-sexual-intimacy-in-marriage/

"Married persons should understand that if in their marital relations they are guilty of unnatural, impure, or unholy practices, they should not enter the temple unless and until they repent and discontinue any such practices." "The First Presidency has interpreted oral sex as constituting an unnatural, impure, or unholy practice."
http://www.lds-mormon.com/worthy_letter1.shtml

The Mormon church later disavowed that, probably realzing that the members were revolting over it.

I'm not aware of it being disavowed.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexuality_and_Mormonism#Oral_sex

I remember when that letter came out. A husband in the district leadership and his wife told us to ignore it, that what married people did in their own bedrooms was their own business. But I'm not aware of any First Presidency disavowal of it.

This is the follow-up letter but is not a disavowal of the previous one.
https://imgur.com/a/L80cK#PYSDPZS



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/15/2018 08:40AM by mikemitchell.

The January 1982 letter led to Bishops and SPs asking married couples detailed questions about their marital relations during worthiness interviews.
The follow up letter in October of that year basically tells them that they shouldn't be asking those questions.
It does not rescind what was said in the original letter about oral sex being an impure and unholy practice.

It was too little too late, the damage had already been done.

Actually, you can do whatever you want wherever you want with whomever you want, as long as it is not officially illegal.

You do not need for there to be a church leader to tell you these things.

You really, truly can actually make the decision all by yourself.

And if any church leader asks you about it, you can simply say, "That's none of your business".

Feel free to throw in some mild profanity for emphasis.

I was told by my bishop that anything went as long as no third parties were introduced. I thought that was fair.

The first two parties would be mighty fun!!

Quite honestly, It's nobody's business but yours, what goes on behind closed doors between consenting adults.

Certainly not your bishop. Privacy rights are constitutionally protected. Tell your bishop and SP to mind their own business!

In mormondum, yes you can, but you may not.

Yep, that sums it up perfectly.

My lds husband does not allow BJ his dad said those are not allowed even when married.

I think that the church has gotten out of the bedroom business, at long last. The last I heard on any sexual question was Hinckley, when he said that couples should not do anything that made the other spouse uncomfortable. That may parallel what sex therapists apparently say (I don't pretend to be schooled in any of this), something like "don't yuck my yum or yum my yuck." Standard disclaimer: I'm not sure that phrase applies.

..."Wanted: Pervy Bishops interested in intimate talk with minors. Some experience needed, criminal records OK. Must be fine with deep, embarrassing, and loaded questions. Physical contact with minor children OK when authorized. See Stake President Fuzzy for details."

"The Church Handbook for leaders states that the three bishopric members should ensure that members from ages 12 to 17 are interviewed twice a year during which they are to discuss the "importance of obeying the commandments, particularly ... refraining from any kind of sexual activity, and refraining from viewing, reading, or listening to pornographic material."[79] It also states that disciplinary council should not be called for members "who are struggling with pornography or self-abuse."[80]"


..."struggling", as in a drowning, or cliff-hanging type event?

> ..."struggling", as in a drowning, or cliff-hanging type event?

Hmmm...I was hoping 'struggling' as in not quite getting it right.

Whatever you do behind closed is up to you and spouse.

And THE LORD. BECAUSE THE LORD IS IN THERE WITH YOU.

EVERY. TIME.

I'v always thought of that personal relationship with Christ that mormons boast about, and him being in the bedroom with you as some kind of weird spiritual 3 way.

Creepy.

Exactly. Jesus Voyeur Christ!

With Jesus, Daddy God, Holy Casper, spirits, angels, dead Grandpa, Satan and Santa watching everything you do, it's a wonder anyone can get off! Maybe we have to think of it as a supernatural voyeur orgy.


If you do it under a sheet, can they still see? I mean, how do they see through walls but not see through our physical bodies? I guess they have filters they can dial for what level of watching they want to do.

There are no closed doors with religion (well, except maybe when you are talking to a priest- I suspect they are the ones who know there is no god watching j/k). Religion is eager to be involved in your sex life in one way or another. They set the cultural mores and people encourage it.

This thread reminded me of a posting in Patheos(dot)com by Horus Gilgamesh, who used to be an evangelical preacher but has since recognized the dark side of religious beliefs and practices; he has become an atheist, blogs, and has written several volumes of "Awkward Moments (not found in your average) Children's Bible". I'm not advertising here for him; I'm letting you know his background. Here is the blog post of his appropriate for this thread.

https://www.patheos.com/blogs/abletochoose/2018/11/kicking-jesus-in-christian-bedroom/?fbclid=IwAR0wRV83QUThAg_WjgD5pKNHQmkkzmNd1vsYJ4dW-1UtG2qg5uMO1cuOP_Y

We did...but then again I wasn't married to a Mormon girl either.

Ha-Ha-ha!Olddog, me too!

I pictured some guy struggling with his DVD player.

Oral sex is OK for BYU students, but sex is not OK.

It is OK for a husband to rape his wife. I was not allowed a
temple divorce for this, and ex-husband is still a "member in good standing."

It is OK for a husband to beat his wife. Ditto "member in good standing.

It is OK for a husband to strangle his wife, until she stops breathing. Ditto

According to JS in D&C 132, and Gordon B. Hinckley, and my temple ex-husband, a wife is a husband's possession.

If your church is telling you what you and your spouse can do in the bedroom, you need a new church

One shouldn't conflate marriage with love, sex, or even religious inquests or interference.
The Mormon church doesn't marry you, you marry it.

They also don't know what you need to have more - or less -
mormons, or more fun, or happiness, or anything.

You can close your doors all you want.
Mormonism changes nothing. More doors.

More bs, rhetoric, problems, etc.
Do what you want, and continue to.

It's your life... and you must live-
Sooner or later - or you'll wish you had.

M@t

Missionary position in the dark for procreation only.

Standard one piece issue garments preferred.

Flush Mormon mind control and just be yourself.

"Missionary position in the dark for procreation only.

Standard one piece issue garments preferred."


99 seconds of celestial duty while humming "cum, cum ye saints" with your eyes closed and thinking unsexy thoughts.

In my opinion, you can do whatever you want, with whomever you want as long as it's between consenting adults. Even in marriage, there should be consent first.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/16/2018 09:00AM by doyle18.

I mean can you, should you, or will you?

There are probably a lot of things that go on behind closed doors that shouldn't be happening. And I would bet that Mormons are just as guilty of closed door shenanigans as other people.

But, the list of things that the Mormon church says you shouldn't do includes a lot of things that are perfectly fine and not many of the things that shouldn't be happening.

Ma and I got hitched around 1980 in the free and loose 70s under the reign of Spencer W. Sexpervert and we had our interview by the Bishop in a very small rural farming town. Said Bishop had known my wife her entire life and ran cattle on the piece of land adjacent to her family farm. The dear bishop, when it came time to give us the sexual guidance portion of the pep-talk, used agriculutrally based animal husbandry terms for the common activities and strange euphemisms for the less common activities. To this day I am still not sure he was referring to anal and oral sex, but we got the firm idea from his hand gestures that both were forbidden. (Imagine Junior Samples from Heehaw pantomiming anal and oral with hand gestures.) My wife and I still laugh about this. And old bishop is still alive, we saw him this summer and broke out laughing when we shook hands.

Yes; one person can do whatever they choose, but when another person is involved, consent becomes the key to longevity.

Yes... as long as you open the windows: the windows of possibility.

M@t

As most men will attest, we're lucky to do anything in the bedroom besides sleep.