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Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 10:46AM

The other day I had a TBM family member mention that she had been to a new to her restaurant and said the "Chicken Marsala was absolutely delicious. I could eat it every day."

Second TBM raises a brow and says, "Marsala is wine you know."

First one says "Yes, but the alcohol burns off in cooking leaving the flavor."

TBM # 2 then retorts imperiously, "I could never take that chance." Then gives a look that says, 'Ha! I win.'

Apostate #1, me, is laughing inside but starting to burst at the seams. The inanity of this is mind boggling. Is this a real conversation between adults in their fifties?

I cannot count the times in my life I have heard this same exchange between Mormons. Starting when I was a teen and my brother and his friends had gone to a fancy french restaurant after prom and one of the guys ordered a dish cooked with wine. My brother and parents discussed for a good twenty minutes whether that was okay or not even if the alcohol cooks off and never did come to a conclusion. My brother said he would never. He is now a minor G.A.

I have had enough Mormon conversation in my life. Please don't make me go to the CK. My mom says I have to go because I am sealed to her. Not kidding. Please come and drag me back to the Terrestial kingdom if this happens. Or even Outer Darkness. I hear the Chicken Marsala there is excellent.

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Posted by: mel ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 10:51AM

Done, I will probably see you there in Outer Darkness, licking off the last of the Chicken Marsala from my lips...

because....

I eat cookies, made with vanilla, 35% alcohol......

yum

Does it evaporate during cooking? Fast facts:

"The boiling temperature of ethyl alcohol is 173 degrees F at sea level, cookies baked at 350F is nearly twice the boiling temperature of alcohol but if you like them super soft in the middle, can't guarantee the alcohol will evaporate."

From a helpful vanilla extract producer site:
https://lagrima.com/blogs/news/10179737-is-there-alcohol-left-after-i-bake-with-vanilla-extract



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 01/10/2019 10:59AM by mel.

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Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 10:53AM

Be careful. Next thing you know you'll be drinking the vanilla straight from the bottle.

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Posted by: mel ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 11:01AM

Done,

My quick research did say you could get drunk from vanilla extract (some is 70% alcohol) but you would have to be pretty desperate to try it.

Me, I will stick with the gooey centered cookies dripping with unevaporated vanilla.

:)

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Posted by: ificouldhietokolob ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 03:04PM

Have you seen the price of vanilla extract lately?
It's gone through the roof!

https://www.businessinsider.com/vanilla-expensive-stolen-madagascar-2018-9

If it's alcohol you want, beer/wine are much more cost effective :)

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Posted by: kathleen ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 11:02AM

Fresh off Rusty's notepad:

Along with secret handshakes, you must pass the nystagmus test!

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Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 11:32AM

Yay! A new word. How on earth did you find nystagmus? Who are you keeping company with anyway, kathleen, in order to happen on to that?

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Posted by: Dave the Atheist ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 11:38AM

One more thing to worry about.

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Posted by: sbg ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 11:05AM

Per the Music Man.........I'm sure eating wine sauce also applies

"The first big step on the road
To the depths of deg-ra-Day--
I say, first, medicinal wine from a teaspoon,
Then beer from a bottle."

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Posted by: valkyriequeen ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 11:14AM

I think most of the extract flavors have some amount of alcohol in them. I just checked my delicious to the taste and very desirable Almond extract, and it has 32% alcohol. :)

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Posted by: Dave the Atheist ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 11:39AM

And don't swallow nyquil.

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Posted by: thedesertrat1 ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 01:13PM

As a hotel Chef I made "veal scallopini marsala: reularly. Members of my ward used to drive across town to partake thereof!!!!!!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/10/2019 01:14PM by thedesertrat1.

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Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 02:48PM

Yes. Those are my kind of Mormons!

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Posted by: anon 4 this one ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 01:59PM

Ha to TBM #2. The human body makes minute quantities of alcohol all by itself. You can't get to absolute zero.


"The average human digestive system produces approximately 3g of ethanol per day through fermentation of its contents."

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ethanol_metabolism#Human_metabolic_physiology


"Minute quantity amounts (average 196 ppb) of endogenous ethanol and acetaldehyde were found in the exhaled breath of healthy volunteers."

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ethanol#Natural_occurrence

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Posted by: ificouldhietokolob ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 03:06PM

Mother Nature clearly isn't our mormon celestial mommy...
Or at the very least, she's not active! :)

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Posted by: smirkorama ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 04:06PM

anon 4 this one Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Ha to TBM #2. The human body makes minute
> quantities of alcohol all by itself. You can't get
> to absolute zero.

No wonder that mortals are automatically are bound for Hell, unless they are changed and refined by the processes of MORmONISM.

.....just exactly HOW do secret handshakes block the organic break down process that creates alcohols????

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Posted by: geekchick603 ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 03:26PM

A joke my father often enjoyed telling about this very topic. FYI: He was a TBM until his death and held several callings during his lifetime (bishop, high counsel, patriarch, temple worker, etc.) still enjoyed telling the joke.

A non-denominal "church" picnic is held each year in this particular town. Everyone brings something from their traditional heritage to share.

One year the teenage boys got the idea to spike the dessert watermelon with a bottle of vodka.

After dinner, the watermelon was shared around and the Catholic Bishop was seen going back for seconds and 3rds. The Baptist minister was seen taking one bite and then throwing the piece away in disgust. The Mormon Bishop was seen collecting as many of the watermelon seeds as he could carry.

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Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: January 10, 2019 03:44PM

Haha. Love that one. Even more because your TBM Dad told it. How could he resist? It's too good.

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