Recovery Board
: RfM
Recovery from Mormonism (RfM) discussion forum.
sleeping (yes, just sleeping!) with your bf/gf as learning...
is there some value to that, 'before marriage'?
has anyone experienced this?
what about those old stories of couples sleeping with a board between them???
yeah, it's late here, not much going on :)
eta: this was called 'Bundling'
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/18/2019 12:17AM by GNPE.
is there some value to that, 'before marriage'?
has anyone experienced this?
what about those old stories of couples sleeping with a board between them???
yeah, it's late here, not much going on :)
eta: this was called 'Bundling'
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/18/2019 12:17AM by GNPE.
First time I slept with my ex and my boyfriend, there was more than just sleeping going on.
Funny thing is, my ex had slept with many men, but I wasn't even allowed to stay over at his apartment on the couch, though I had to drive 30 miles home to my parents' house, while we were engaged. The neighbors might think something was going on was his argument. I wonder what they thought when men were staying over.
Anyway, what you've written about the board, etc., is pretty funny I think.
Funny thing is, my ex had slept with many men, but I wasn't even allowed to stay over at his apartment on the couch, though I had to drive 30 miles home to my parents' house, while we were engaged. The neighbors might think something was going on was his argument. I wonder what they thought when men were staying over.
Anyway, what you've written about the board, etc., is pretty funny I think.
Aside from sex, I think it is intensely important to sleep with anyone you might want to have a relationship with.
In a couple, both people can learn some very important information from the "just sleeping" times:
Do your touch needs align with each other?
How well do each of you "fit" together re: cuddling (and liking, or NOT liking, to cuddle)?
Are each of your skin temperatures compatible? (This turned out to be a HUGE issue in one of my relationships.)
Also: what are the favored bedclothes of each of you? Are they compatible? (This was an issue in another of my younger-adult relationships.)
In addition: This doesn't happen hardly ever anymore (unless I am under REALLY extreme stress) but starting from my mid-twenties, I began having real "wide-awake" nightmares in which people were coming through the window by the bed, or there were less-than-savory people in the kitchen who were a threat to me/us....and I could be, by all appearances, "totally awake," talking absolutely normally after visiting the kitchen, about the several people who I was totally convinced were there, in the kitchen, talking about me (in a somehow malevolent way). [*] I didn't realize for a very long time that it was the extreme pressures I was under which were causing these "waking nightmares"--but if either party in a couple is subject to anything similar, it is an excellent idea to find out before, rather than after, you might make long-lasting committments.
[*] One day, maybe two or three years after I married, my husband was writing something which involved child actors, and he asked me to tell him about all the cattle calls I went to when I was growing up. So I told him, and as I was telling him, he got this weird look on his face and said: "That's what you say when you wake up and think there are bad people in the kitchen who are discussing you." Bingo! I never had one of those particular "waking nightmares" again, and that was a long time ago.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/18/2019 12:53AM by Tevai.
In a couple, both people can learn some very important information from the "just sleeping" times:
Do your touch needs align with each other?
How well do each of you "fit" together re: cuddling (and liking, or NOT liking, to cuddle)?
Are each of your skin temperatures compatible? (This turned out to be a HUGE issue in one of my relationships.)
Also: what are the favored bedclothes of each of you? Are they compatible? (This was an issue in another of my younger-adult relationships.)
In addition: This doesn't happen hardly ever anymore (unless I am under REALLY extreme stress) but starting from my mid-twenties, I began having real "wide-awake" nightmares in which people were coming through the window by the bed, or there were less-than-savory people in the kitchen who were a threat to me/us....and I could be, by all appearances, "totally awake," talking absolutely normally after visiting the kitchen, about the several people who I was totally convinced were there, in the kitchen, talking about me (in a somehow malevolent way). [*] I didn't realize for a very long time that it was the extreme pressures I was under which were causing these "waking nightmares"--but if either party in a couple is subject to anything similar, it is an excellent idea to find out before, rather than after, you might make long-lasting committments.
[*] One day, maybe two or three years after I married, my husband was writing something which involved child actors, and he asked me to tell him about all the cattle calls I went to when I was growing up. So I told him, and as I was telling him, he got this weird look on his face and said: "That's what you say when you wake up and think there are bad people in the kitchen who are discussing you." Bingo! I never had one of those particular "waking nightmares" again, and that was a long time ago.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/18/2019 12:53AM by Tevai.
Yes, heard about it in Scotland.
And when "temptation" came they removed the board.
And when "temptation" came they removed the board.
So much for sleeping with wood.
Never that bored, or board.
Is that what you mean by that?
Sleeping is important.
Who you sleep with - or don't -
Is just as important as who
Sleeps with you.
Find out what you can before deciding on deeper and wider experiments.
Practice makes perfect.
Try before you buy.
Learn by trying.
Experience.
M@t
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/19/2019 11:32AM by moremany.
Is that what you mean by that?
Sleeping is important.
Who you sleep with - or don't -
Is just as important as who
Sleeps with you.
Find out what you can before deciding on deeper and wider experiments.
Practice makes perfect.
Try before you buy.
Learn by trying.
Experience.
M@t
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/19/2019 11:32AM by moremany.
Yup, bundling: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bundling_(tradition)
I think sleeping and otherwise spending non-sexual intimate time with a prospective partner is a great idea. You’ll get to see each other how you truly are. Sex is fun, but it’s the other things that usually make or break a relationship.
I think sleeping and otherwise spending non-sexual intimate time with a prospective partner is a great idea. You’ll get to see each other how you truly are. Sex is fun, but it’s the other things that usually make or break a relationship.
East Coast Exmo Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Yup, bundling
>
> ... sleeping and otherwise spending non-sexual intimate time with a prospective partner is a great idea. You’ll get to see each other how you truly are. Sex is fun, but it’s the other things that usually make or break a relationship.
Amen -
I like a variety of experiences with someone - day and night, high and low, fast and slow - as they like with me, so we can see...
-------------------------------------------------------
> Yup, bundling
>
> ... sleeping and otherwise spending non-sexual intimate time with a prospective partner is a great idea. You’ll get to see each other how you truly are. Sex is fun, but it’s the other things that usually make or break a relationship.
Amen -
I like a variety of experiences with someone - day and night, high and low, fast and slow - as they like with me, so we can see...
Wife and I slept (yes, just slept) together before marriage quite often. I think it was very helpful.