Recovery Board  : RfM
Recovery from Mormonism (RfM) discussion forum. 
Go to Topic: PreviousNext
Go to: Forum ListMessage ListNew TopicSearchLog In
Posted by: GregS ( )
Date: February 01, 2019 11:49AM

I laughed out loud, but no. ;)

Replace the muscular warriors with cosplayers, and it'll be a little closer to my thought bubble.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/01/2019 11:49AM by GregS.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Wally Prince ( )
Date: February 01, 2019 12:06PM

So...what do they plan to do with all of those swords, axes, spears and clubs?

I get the impression that the artist is a young person who definitely has talent worth developing as an illustrator. He/she may also be having some sexual fantasies about missionaries (perhaps at a very subliminal, repressed level) that are not fully in line with the ostensible "mission" that the missionaries are supposedly called to carry out.

In my experience, there have always been a few buff missionaries. But it's more typical to see missionaries who look like they would struggle to lift a 1-gallon milk jug over their head and whose clothes are too baggy and never quite fit.

From this illustration, I get a strong impression in my mind that the next scene depends on who meets them at the door. They are then offered with a choice of (1) watching the buff "Indians" do a sexy dance by themselves, (2) watching the buff "Indians" and "White Mormons" do a sexy dance with each other; or (3) getting a masochistically pleasurable "beating" from one of the buff "Indians" or buff "White Mormons" or any combination thereof.

Who could ever possible turn down such an offer?

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: February 01, 2019 12:30PM

Studly missionaries! hahahaha ha ha ha With tomahawks and spears! Hahahahah ha. And---Lamanites to bring it all home! ROTFL

The Mormons are going to eat this up.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Roy G Biv ( )
Date: February 01, 2019 02:30PM

Oh, that brings back memories. I remember getting a list of all the things I should bring on my mission.

All the essentials....clothing, bathroom stuff, church books, sword, battle ax, spear, shield, umbrella, sun glasses, etc.

I remember one companion that arrived fresh from the MTC and he had neglected to bring his battle ax. Do you know how hard it is to find a battle ax on a tiny Caribbean island. We had to get permission from the Mission President so he could use a machete as a substitute......good times!

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: CrispingPin ( )
Date: February 01, 2019 02:44PM

The artist needs to add some shading to the Lamanites. After all, they were cursed with a skin of darkness.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Roy G Biv ( )
Date: February 01, 2019 02:48PM

That's exactly what it looks like when the missionaries are on your porch if you look with your spiritual eyes. Unless the nephite warriors are busy guarding the MTC or something and could make the appointment

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Wally Prince ( )
Date: February 01, 2019 09:08PM

or the Stripping Warriors? I always get those two groups mixed up.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Hervey Willets ( )
Date: February 02, 2019 12:46AM

The Mormon boyz xrated site could use if for one of their ads.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: cludgie ( )
Date: February 02, 2019 03:19PM

The guys in the background are the Sons of Helaman, there to keep you from masturbating. Today's organization by the same name is for kids who can't stop masturbating. And since masturbation is among the sins "next only to murder in seriousness," wanking off could ruin the world as we know it.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: February 04, 2019 11:27AM

I thought they were to keep those buff stud missionaries from masturbating? They would never leave a missionary injured by porn on the battlefield.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ueuz0-Rnd5c

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: pollythinks ( )
Date: February 02, 2019 03:35PM

No big deal--they knew I was Mormon, and they have to have somebody to talk to in this thankless task.

Because I live alone, I went out on my covered porch and set awhile to talk with them, and gave them each an energy bar.

At the time, I still had a Christmas decoration hanging on my porch (one my husband designed and made), and they agreed to take it to my back-yard shed, at the side of my garage, to put it away--happy to be of service and do something useful.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Dave the Atheist ( )
Date: February 04, 2019 11:44AM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5QKf6w1CaoU

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kv2xDFQnlVw



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/04/2019 11:59AM by Dave the Atheist.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Aquarius123 ( )
Date: February 05, 2019 04:17PM

Dave the Atheist Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5QKf6w1CaoU
>
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kv2xDFQnlVw


FOFLMFAO!!!! Those clips made my day! I'm going to see if that movie is on Netflix!

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: moremany ( )
Date: February 05, 2019 02:32PM

To the missionaries

Elder Berry Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> https://www.freelancer.com/contest/missionary-warr
> ior-sketch-400863-byentry-9020622.html

How?

Not welcome

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: February 05, 2019 02:47PM

I don't understand.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: numbersRus ( )
Date: February 05, 2019 06:27PM

"This is what I think of myself" by some naive kid brainwashed into looking forward to going on a Mormon mission.
We could come up with the rest..
What my Mom thinks of me... baby being fed to wolves
What my friends think of me... naive kid
What I'm really like... awkward 18 year-old with ill-fitting suit

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: February 06, 2019 01:17PM


Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: February 06, 2019 01:44PM

And if they want to look in a real mirror there is this thing.

https://kettleembroidery.com/product/8-x-10-future-missionary-plaque-mirror/

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: February 06, 2019 01:19PM

This is closer to the truth than the link I started this with...

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/did-you-just-fart-because-11866219

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: exminion ( )
Date: February 06, 2019 07:54PM

AAAAAARRRRGGGGGHH! You just gave me PTSD flashbacks!

This accurately illustrates the thugs that kept beating at my door, after 9:30 at night, when I was living alone! There were only 2 or 3 of them, usually, but this is how they behaved!

Notice, there are no females. I'm sure this is how the Mormon males envision themselves--as warriors--coming to fight with you, until you give in and give them your money and your children!

This brings to mind the Primary song, "We Are As The Armies of Helaman," one of the Mormons' tools to promote abuse, violence, male Mormon supremacy.

I was assaulted with attempted rape by one of these, who hid in the shadows on the BYU campus, and jumped on me, threw me to the ground, and broke my arm. I married one of them in the temple, who beat me so badly, that I barely escaped with my life. Violent, hateful Mormons! Here I go...PTSD nightmares tonight.

No--instead, I went back and re-read some of your hilarious comments here. Crisis averted. Thanks!

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: February 08, 2019 02:16PM

Sorry??

Options: ReplyQuote
Go to Topic: PreviousNext
Go to: Forum ListMessage ListNew TopicSearchLog In


Screen Name: 
Your Email (optional): 
Subject: 
Spam prevention:
Please, enter the code that you see below in the input field. This is for blocking bots that try to post this form automatically.
 ********  **    **  ********   ********   **     ** 
 **        ***   **  **     **  **     **  **     ** 
 **        ****  **  **     **  **     **  **     ** 
 ******    ** ** **  ********   ********   **     ** 
 **        **  ****  **         **         **     ** 
 **        **   ***  **         **         **     ** 
 **        **    **  **         **          *******