Some family members tried to bait me. Like they have been doing for years - putting me down and shaming me for telling them to stop.
The last few months I have become aware about what they have been up to for years. So I stopped reacting and things started to escalate after that. My BIL has been very close to me for years. Known him for about 25 years but the last ten years he have been scapegoating me. Life has changed. Like it do for everybody. So about a month ago he pushed every button to make me angry, told me how worthless I was that I did not measure up and had to live up to some conditions to keep the relationship going.
I did not react. He noticed that after a few minutes and he sat there in a drunk haze with a ridiculos and psychopathic smile on his face.
After that all forms of intimacy in the relationship are gone.
He did not want to pay the price and reform our relationship into a more equal one.
Some family members are opting out when they can not make me unhappy anymore.
Sad to see and it feels a bit unfair. But it is something that must happen because they can not regulate the emotions in their life. We are to old for this kind of problems.
Lots of members, because they are under control big time by the cult they are in, react by controlling others. After all, this is how they have been taught to act by that so-called-one-true-church -on-earth that tells the whole world how marvelous and TRUE they are.
You know, they must spout this message out all the time because they know that people will not pick up the message from how they witness the cult acting.
Hang in there....you never know just when your example will rub off on those people.