Posted by:
Wally Prince
(
)
Date: March 17, 2019 12:42AM
It was founded in ancient times as the "Church of Ramah" and was in ancient times simply referred to as "Ramah".
It was very popular from the very beginning due to the fact that ancient priests of Ramah served up a buffet of various meats, vegetables, breads and desserts to anyone who was willing to make a reasonable donation.
It was restored by Joseph Smith at the same time that the temple endowment ordinance was restored and it was given the new name "Chuch O Ramah" which has since evolved into "Chuck O Rama".
At this point, you are no doubt doubting the veracity of the information I am providing here.
So, as corroboration, I offer the following evidence from the Holy Books [with explanatory notes inserted in square brackets]:
2 Chronicles 22:6
And he returned to be healed in Jezreel because of the wounds which were given him at Ramah [The wounds were inflicted in the course of a food fight with Hazael over the last remaining slice of banana cream pie.], when he fought with Hazael king of Syria. And Azariah the son of Jehoram king of Judah went down to see Jehoram the son of Ahab at Jezreel, because he was sick [This was due to food poisoning caused as a result of a lazy Ramah employee putting rancid meat out on the buffet line].
1 Samuel 28:3
"Now Samuel was dead, and all Israel had lamented him, and buried him in Ramah." [The original Church O Ramah was so popular that many leaders essentially lived there, having fallen into inescapable gluttony. As a result, they also often died there and were buried in a special plot set aside for such purpose in the Ramah garden.]
Jeremiah 31:15
"A voice was heard in Ramah, lamentation, and bitter weeping...." [One time, when the assistant manager at Ramah announced that both the BBQ spare ribs and the marshmallow jello salad had run out, the people in Ramah nearly rioted. It was a tense time.]
Judges 19:13
"And he said unto his servant, Come, and let us draw near to one of these places to lodge all night, in Gibeah, or in Ramah." [These people were on a road trip and trying to decide whether to stop near Gibeah (a diner famous for its bacon, eggs, hash browns and pancake combo plate) or Ramah, which was running a special breakfast buffet. Ultimately, they chose Gibeah because the servant had a wicked hankering for flapjacks.]
True story, 100%, can't be denied.