It said something like "every member should read this:"
A lady went to the Bishop and said, "I won't be attending church anymore."
He said, "May I ask why?"
She said, " I see people on their cell phones texting and typing during the sacrament and other meetings. Some are gossiping, some just aren't living right, some are sleeping, some are staring at me! I never get home taught and never hold the 'best callings' there are just too many hypocrites."
The bishop was silent. Then he said, "Can I ask you to do something for me before you make your final decision?"
She said, "Sure, whats that?"
He said, "Take a spoon full of water and walk around the church two times and don't let any water fall on the floor. Can you do that?" She said, "Yes, I can do that!" She went and got a spoon full of water and walked around the church two times. She came back and proudly said, "It's done."
The bishop asked her, "Did you see anybody on their phone?; Did you see anyone gossiping?; Was anybody living wrong?; Did you see anyone sleeping?" She said, "I didn't see anything because I was so focused on this spoon, so the water didn't spill out."
He told her, "When you come to church, you should just focus on the Savior so that you don't fall. That's why Jesus said, "Come follow me, He did not say follow Mormons."
Don't let your relationship with God be determined by how others relate to God. Let it be determined by how focused you are with God."
~Anonymous
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/30/2019 09:45PM by cl2.
Wow. Again, I'm amazed at how the authorities blame the congregants for not appreciating their lousy product. They're definitely at fault. It only they would try harder to like it.
The concentration on the spoon is what allowed her to complete the challenge. But sitting in the chapel, spoonless, on what is she supposed to concentrate? I'd suggest her smartphone, since she'd be able to pick something that interested her.
But if I had to place bets, I would bet that it never really happened. It sounds phony as hell.
Someone leaving because they "never get the best callings".
Leaving because they see people sleeping during meetings.
It doesn't ring true. Even if someone felt that way, they wouldn't list to the bishop those kinds of reasons as their reasons for leaving the church because (a) it makes it sound like they never had a "testimony", and (b) most adults in the church know (at least superficially) that in Mormonism, the flaws of fellow members are never valid reasons for "abandoning the gospel". It's a constant theme in lessons and talks and testimonies, ad infinitum. This phony story is just another one of those variations on a familiar theme.
The stripping Nephite warriors (the "stripping warriors") were stripping while standing in a huge vat of milk at Sister Flinchbutt's home. That's why Thomas Marsh and his wife were so upset.
Thomas had planned to hire the "stripping warriors" to dance for his wife in a vat of grape juice on her birthday. But Sister Flinchbutt, whose birthday happened to be on the same day as Sister Marsh's birthday, heard about his plan and persuaded her husband to quickly hire the stripping warriors to perform at her house instead and in a vat of milk instead of in a vat of grape juice. They beat Marsh to the punch and the rest is distorted history.
Somehow the facts got all garbled up in someone's journal to the point that people nowadays are mistakenly talking about "milk strippings". Doesn't make any sense. First of all, milk can't strip and even if it could nobody would want to watch it strip.
The "stripping warriors" were very popular and are considered to be the forerunners of the modern Chippendale dancers. Another Mormon innovation that has been forgotten by history.
kathleen Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I'd have spilled the water, having been startled > by someone snoring ! > > :)
Kathleen - I just love you and your comments like this - and I mean that in a non-profit way. Regards, AIC
AnonInCali Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > kathleen Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > I'd have spilled the water, having been > startled > > by someone snoring ! > > > > :) > > Kathleen - I just love you and your comments like > this - and I mean that in a non-profit way. > Regards, AIC
Non-creepy, not non-profit. Otto Correct keeps doing that to me!
LOL! I had a friend who wrote for the Ensign, back in the 1970's and 1980's. This sounds just like her!
Wally is right. No one would leave a religion for such stupid reasons.
Those Mormons must carry a lot of spoonfulls of water around lots of ward houses, to keep from thinking about the lies, and polygamy, and money-grabbing. I love this story as a prime example of Mormon slight-of-hand brainwashing.
This is a variant of what I was told before I agreed to go on a mission. "If you don't feel a calling, fast and pray until you do get a calling/spiritual witness." Being young, dumb and in love, I fasted and prayed for a weekend while I was off work. I'm here to tell you that with enough fasting and praying you will get some very strange feelings. Several years after my mission I realized that I can't base my life around abusing my body and mind and having auditory and visual hallucinations.
By having members do weird things against their better judgement, they become "church-broke" where they doubt their own common sense and regard some one else's judgement as superior to their own. At that point, it is difficult to list the pros and cons to being a part of the church or organization and decide to stay or go.
brotherofjared Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I'm here to tell you that with > enough fasting and praying you will get some very > strange feelings.
As a Christian, I would want her to focus on Christ. But can she do that people rambling about how "the Church" is true, how they love it, how it (not He) changed their lives? Can she focus on Christ as she prepares for the 40(?) questions she must answer to maintain her temple recommend? Can she focus on Christ when she must decide whether peppermint tea for her indigestion constitutes a breach of the Word of Wisdom?
This threat "prompted" a question: Do Mormons refer to Jesus more often as "the Savior" or as "the Lord?" I'm especially interested in contemporary usage.
> This threat "prompted" a question: Do Mormons > refer to Jesus more often as "the Savior" or as > "the Lord?" I'm especially interested in > contemporary usage.
I hear "the Savior" most often from Mormons in reference to Jesus. They seem to call him "the Savior" more often than they invoke his actual name.
1. Nobody becomes an ex-Mormon because of phone zombies. We left because Mormonism was built on a lie.
2. Mormon services are all Mormons talking. Jesus isn't giving any input during sacrament meeting.
3. So the solution to seeing other people on their phones is to walk around with a spoon of water. That would be sooooo acceptable in sacrament meeting.
4. The message is typical of Mormon glurge about not leaving- "The church is perfect. You are the one who's wrong. If you see something wrong with out church, take a dose of Ignoreitall. Better yet, take a double dose."
5. Don't share this around too much. Friends don't let friends read glurge.
I agree with opinions here that this is a made-up story. Too perfect!
Real life, Bishop shouts at her and demeans her, gives her the spoon, she trips, breaks an ankle, goes to the hospital still clutching the spoon which the paramedics let her keep hold of, the ER doctor sees her holding the spoon and notes in her chart she’s an addict, this is seen by the insurance company who then refuse to pay the costs of care. She has to get a second job to pay off the hospital, gets fired from her first job for falling asleep due to the second night job.
Later she finds the spoon in her plastic bag of belongings from the hospital. It’s a lovely silver spoon but she has no memory of why she had it due to the trauma of having her broken ankle set without any painkillers. Later, the police show up to arrest her for theft, the Bishop has filed charges for stealing his heirloom silver spoon.
dozing off and snoring loudly for 20 minutes or so. She's in Sacrament Mtg. and half the congregation is staring at her, as she recalls that she must have fallen asleep sometime after she had made a mental note of her disgust at Brother Flemlooger constantly staring at his cell phone and the point where she was wondering whether she could or should leave the church on account of the other congregation members' lack of reverence.
The Holy Ghost had tried to teach her a lesson about hypocrisy through her dream, but it escaped her notice entirely. Instead, she vowed to herself that if she ever caught the bishop off guard, she was going to ram a dry spoon right up his smug burthole.
This story is a plagiarism of an old Buddhist tell how one should concentrate while meditating. While carrying a bowl of oil brimming to the top, walk around the market square. If you spill a drop off with your head. The woman was concentrating so well that the lord Buddha informed her that she was doing meditation practice in the MorgCo the false Church of Jesus Christ. After realizing her hunch was correct she left the church and went into a Buddhist monastery. Lesson to the Morgs: Don't mix your "true" religion with heathenish atheistic practices.
I believe it was Boyd K. Packer who said that "Some things that are true are not useful" so in the case of this story, maybe it's "Some things that are not true are useful!" Anything to make sure the members know that any problems are their fault.
Regardless of whether or not it's real (and I have my doubts), it's a straw man argument. It sets up the reason people leave as because of pride (wanting better callings) and being judgemental of others (essentially pointing out everyone else is just lazy) and the virtuous bishop points out that we should focus on our own salvation.
There are a lot of problems with this: - The reasons she states she's leaving aren't the reasons why the majority of people are leaving. People leave for a lot of reasons. I doubt, people are phone next to them wouldn't break the top 10. There are real problems that the church isn't addressing and are using these types of examples as a redirect.
- The Bishop's message boils down to "stop caring about other people". I'm not a Christian, but isn't that a nice Christian message? That seems like kind of a horrible message, don't worry about other people, focus on yourself.
- The other problem with the Bishop is here is a member of his congregation with a list of problems, that to them (even if they are ridiculous) are big enough that they are planning on no longer attending. The Bishop's response isn't "Thank you for bringing this to my attention, I'm aware of the problems, I've been working on several solutions to how to deal with what you've noticed, do you have any thoughts, I'd love to hear them." No, he says, Here's a spoon with water in it, go away for awhile while I prepare something profound sounding when you get back. Don't worry, I'll continue to not fix any of the problems you've listed.
This is the definition of a "Faith promoting story", most of which when you look at with any kind of skepticism falls apart and makes things worse when you think about them for more than a few seconds..
First: "He did not say follow Mormons." That's some great advice right there!
Second: " I see people on their cell phones texting and typing during the sacrament and other meetings. Some are gossiping, some just aren't living right, some are sleeping, some are staring at me! I never get home taught and never hold the 'best callings' there are just too many hypocrites."
Gossips and hypocrites, by their fruits you will know them.
Don't let your relationship with God be determined by how others relate to God. Let it be determined by how focused you are with God.
-You realize that the Young family was recently excommunicated over this very idea. If you're not on-board 100% with the church's covenant path, then you're falling away and the church must cut you off to save itself.
Reminds of a motivational speaker who works in financial services industry. She said to her audience that each person is responsible for (working out) their own salvation, not anyone else's.
She also added that when good people acquired wealth, based on her experience, they became better people. People who were corrupt to begin with only became moreso after becoming wealthy. A unique insight from a self-made multi-millionaire.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/02/2019 10:34AM by Amyjo.
When I told my Bishop why I was left he said, "Well I didn't come here to argue with you." I said,"I'm not arguing. You asked why I left and I gave you my reasons why, racism, sexism, abuse, lies, coverups...the list is long and you don't have any real answers to my valid reasons so you just accuse me of arguing." We agreed to disagree, shook hands and bid each other farewell.
I only rated the second counselor for my exit interview. When I pointed out the blatent racism in the B of M, he said, "Sister Dorothy, you've been listening to the devil."