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Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: July 10, 2019 06:49PM

I confess. I apologize

I broke rule 7 here.

https://www.exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,2219704

I had a post of mine deleted because possibly I was attempting to mind-read another poster.

And mind reading is I believe this?

"The popular perception of "mind reading”—the act of knowing someone’s thoughts and feelings through innate, telepathic means—is likely an impossible feat of fantasy. What is real, however, is the psychological concept of "empathic accuracy," which is the ability to accurately map someone's mental terrain by reading the cues telegraphed by their words, emotions, and body language."
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/mind-reading

So this is a part of what we evolved to do I believe. How hard is this for you not to do here? I find it extremely difficult. Granted I would like my own mind reading not to be a knee jerk reaction. But it is part of the allure possibly because of the anonymity. We may know each other's real names and be able to stalk people on FB as a result but we don't really have access to their body language, voice inflections, demeanor and such. Other posters become a puzzle to decipher and impute with characteristics that aren't really part of them.

I've tried my best to abide by the rules of the board. Sometimes I think this is an impossible task.

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Posted by: ziller ( )
Date: July 10, 2019 07:26PM

ziller tried mind-reading once ~


brb ~ worse headache ever ~

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Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: July 10, 2019 07:33PM

All human communication is "mind reading" for the simple reason that words, grammar, gestures and facial expressions are imprecise. Sometimes the thoughts behind those signals are ill-formed and lack precision as well, meaning that the ambiguity does not lie in the interpretation at all

The situation is even more fraught when communication is electronic since there are so many fewer signals. What you describe is therefore perfectly understandable.

There are, of course, many rules on the board and they require interpretation every bit as much as readers must interpret what others write. We can only hope that those rules are enforced reasonably and equitably. Sometimes it feels as if they are not, that standards are applied unevenly.

Anyway, you have my friendship and my respect.

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Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: July 11, 2019 01:41PM

Lot's Wife Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Anyway, you have my friendship and my respect.

Thanks. In a world of ambiguity and miscommunication you are a beacon of clarity.

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Posted by: bona dea ( )
Date: July 10, 2019 09:55PM

There are a few posters who attribute meaning and motives to other posters that were.not intended. Whether they do it deliberately or simply misunderstand is anotherquestion. For a who do it regularly, I think it is likely deliberate. If not they have aml real comprehension problem.I may be wrong, but I think that is what the mods meant.

As for the OP, I didnt read your post or dont remember which one it was it, but if you dont know why it was deleted, ask. You can use the report feature. I have done that a few times. In one case, it was because the post above it was deleted along with replies. It may not be about your post at all.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/10/2019 09:56PM by bona dea.

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Posted by: Tevai ( )
Date: July 10, 2019 11:00PM

Elder Berry:

Your very thoughtful, and well thought out, post of July 8th was a negative analysis of another member's posts and psyche--a member who you named in your post.

This meant it was, by the rules of this board, a personal attack, and personal attacks are not allowed here.

If you had written the post differently, if you have written in a far more generalized way, which did not directly identify the person you were writing about, and especially if you had not actually named the poster you were referring to, your post would likely have been okay.

I hope you do not go. I have been reading your posts with great interest for a long time, I think probably from early 2003, when I accidentally "landed" here after a Google search, and I think the board would be poorer without you.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/10/2019 11:01PM by Tevai.

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Posted by: Aloysius ( )
Date: July 10, 2019 11:11PM

Why is it that when EB says my opinions are "bullshit" it's fine, but when I say the same about his, my post gets deleted?

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Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: July 10, 2019 11:23PM

His post was deleted too, no?

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Posted by: Aloysius ( )
Date: July 10, 2019 11:54PM

Nope. He even specifically gave me permission to use that word when describing his opinions.

https://www.exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,2230463,2230546#msg-2230546

Also said I was "hypersensitive" and had a "fragile ego."

Lovely guy. (irony)



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/11/2019 12:02AM by Aloysius.

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Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: July 11, 2019 01:48PM

Aloysius Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Also said I was "hypersensitive" and had a
> "fragile ego."
>
> Lovely guy. (irony)

You said this.
> Please stop inviting us.
> This is proselytizing.
> It should not be allowed.

The other poster said this.
"An interesting take. Also utter bullshit."

I said this.
It isn't. Is this hypersensitivity? Fragile ego?

Both myself and the other poster disagree with you that it was proselytizing.

Thinking swear words are personal attacks and people who disagree with you attacking you invited my mind reading hypersensitivity? Fragile ego? in you.

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Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: July 11, 2019 01:45PM

you found the post but misrepresented it again. I never said your opinion was bullshit. Another poster did and I was defending their right to do so.

I still believe posters should be able to call other poster's opinions bullshit.

I still believe posters should be able to tell off other posters without name calling and belittling them. (The f-off from the angry poster toying with the idea of inviting missionaries over.)

Swear words don't make something a personal attack in my opinion.

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Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: July 11, 2019 01:42PM

Tevai Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> If you had written the post differently, if you
> have written in a far more generalized way, which
> did not directly identify the person you were
> writing about, and especially if you had not
> actually named the poster you were referring to,
> your post would likely have been okay.

I wish I had. I was frustrated with the individual and lashed out irrationally.

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Posted by: caffiend ( )
Date: July 11, 2019 12:02AM

It's also part of the charisma skill set--an above-average ability to read people, sense their needs and responses. The other part of the sill set is the ability to meet their unspoken needs and desires, which the mark(s) may not even know/acknowledge themselves.

Powerful people in business, politics, religion, the military, and the performing arts have this. Some for good, but far too many for ill.

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Posted by: jacob ( )
Date: July 11, 2019 01:44PM

Serious question.

How is one to learn that their shit stinks if no one tells them?


Sometimes we're so caught up in being right that we fail to require any emotional intelligence of our self. It may well take a mind reader to point out the inconsistencies between our stated values and the values that others perceive in our words and actions. Surely it is helpful to have someone tell you that what you are saying and what you are doing don't jive.

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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: July 11, 2019 02:10PM

"One man's shit is another's customized soil enhancement additive."

--Judic West, Omnoxious the VII, head of Nightsoil Industries, SA

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Posted by: cl2 ( )
Date: July 11, 2019 01:52PM

You are one of my favorites. I come here looking for posts by certain individuals and skip the rest. Your's are some of the ones I look for daily.

There are so many interesting posters who have left (like hie and Done & Done also seems to be missing) and it really makes a difference.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/11/2019 01:55PM by cl2.

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Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: July 11, 2019 02:29PM

I wasn't planning on leaving.

I posted something against the rules. I checked the rules and found one that appeared to be the one I broke.

I was fooling myself.

I suspected I broke the personal attack. I did.

"This meant it was, by the rules of this board, a personal attack, and personal attacks are not allowed here."

Thanks for your reply cl2. I read your replies and am amazed at your heart. You and your daughter's relationship hits so close to home for me.

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