I identify as bisexual. It opens me up to much scorn from anyone who thinks sexual orientation is fixed in stone with Moses.

Growing up I have had many times where I felt like I was on Sesame Street in the little "game" one of these things is not like the other. And I've felt many time in my life that I was an intruder into the heterosexual male brain of the many male companions that I've found myself "in their midst" with.

And this didn't end when I became an adult. As an adult Mormon male I've interacted with many other Mormon men. Some of them always seemed to bring up the polygamy thing. I suspect many more secretly enjoy mentally masturbating with polygamy but would never audibly voice these thoughts. They are super sacred you know.

And I was the "odd man out." Well, I wasn't out. They all thought I was as straight and narrow sexually minded as they. They didn't know my super sacred sexually motivated secrets. And as an inadverted interloper into their worship of my ancestor Brigham Young I was privy to some of their audibly spoken thoughts upon the future female occupants of their mansions in The Celestial Kingdom. They are looking forward with relish to their harems in heaven.

I am taken aback every time I hear this and I won't stop hearing it from these Mormon men without guile. They usually are second counselors or secretaries and never the more discerning presidents and bishops. But they always seem to be in awe and wonder at how I would eschew the spiritual sexual fantasies proffered me by Joseph Smith and his successor/henchman Brigham Young. It is what keeps them going to church.

Poor saps. At least Joe and Brigham got to have real sex and not the spiritual fantasizing kind. But I guess this focus on sex is really keeping some Mormon men in the fold. And I wonder if their wives have a clue. I suspect the vocal ones have wives who do.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/16/2019 12:28PM by Elder Berry.

My ex's father was looking for his polygamous wives all his married life. He found a woman in the ward when he was a bishop who he decided would be his first wife and he told his wife that she would be #2. He ate lunch at Ricks' cafeteria even as an old man. He got picked up for stalking students when he was in his 80s. He was considered to be a stalwart wonderful man to those who weren't his kids. He would have fit in well with the FLDS. I know I've talked about him before. My kids "inherited" his car when he died to drive to school. They found a "prophylactic" in it. We named the car old rubber.

There is no way in HELL that my mother would tolerate polygamy and my dad wouldn't want to practice it anyway. They were both so jealous if the other even talked to someone of the opposite sex. They had an interesting relationship in that they argued constantly, but I sure saw how much they loved each other at the end.

My older sister, again, NO WAY IN HELL. I was teasing her husband once after my ex left me and saying, "She won't even make an exception for me, HER SISTER!" And he seriously said, "NO!" Not like I'd want to be either.

I would prefer to be married to my husband and share him with other men than share him with other women.

I've worked with a lot of men in my life--the majority of the people working at "Thiokol" were men. My boss, who was a really good man and I adored him, told me that most of them went to strip clubs when they would travel for company business. He said he had given it up.

My boyfriend works with a bunch of mormon men and he'd tell you the same thing. They are envious of my boyfriend just because he can keep beer around the house and he doesn't have to be married to me. (I'm the one who decided that one.)

Hell, working with the leaders with my gay ex was weird. The attitude IS that if a gay just had sex with a woman, they'd never go back as they, themselves, wanted MORE AND MORE sex with women and they can't have it. They have to be good little boys. I think part of the issue with gays and mormon leaders is they can have all the sex they want without getting someone pregnant.

And I said a lot.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 08/16/2019 12:57PM by cl2.

"I was teasing her husband once after my ex left me and saying, "She won't even make an exception for me, HER SISTER!" And he seriously said, "NO!" Not like I'd want to be either."

LOL! His loss. I have never run into a Mormon man who I think is way on the hetero side of the sexual orientation spectrum who would say "NO!" to polygamy. The more to that side of the spectrum the more I think the men there would welcome female genetic variety in their partnering. I think many people who aren't asexual want some variety there.

My problem is I always dreamed of a one-to-one partnering. Someone I could wholeheartedly give my life to for its duration. It took maturity for me to disentangle sex from this desire. I think it is immature to expect emotional close pairing with multiple partners. Many men in the past probably had platonic emotional pairings and women platonic emotional pairings that had nothing to do with their spouse. Polygamy is more a sexual and reproductive arrangement for tribal living. The FLDS even prohibit sex with post-menopause women.

read something your relative said--you know that polygamist one--ha ha ha. Zina. I realized mormonism is about lack of intimacy. She said you shouldn't get too close to your husband as it causes problems with the other wives. My great grandmother said that same type of thing. But it was when I read what Zina said that it hit me--things like sending kids on missions. Ripping them away from their families, mothers from sons. I saw so many of my friends suffer through this. And then the relationships are never the same.

My BIL is RULED by my sister. He might think it would be okay, but he WILL NOT BE ALLOWED to do such a thing. My sister has stated she doesn't care if she goes to the CK (but she tends to wonder if there is one), there will be no polygamy. He's made stupid mistakes before like throwing out the edible underwear a coworker gave him and didn't tell her about it. They actually have a good marriage. Don't be too shocked. He needs someone to push him to do things or he would never have done anything in life. She got him through college and he taught school for a long time. I'm laughing pretty hard right now.

She ruled me most of my life, too, and her kids.

I always wanted to just be with one man. Now I am. I wish sometimes that I had married him in my 20s, but as my boyfriend said last night, "You weren't ready for me yet." Yep.

Your weren't ready and your BIL wasn't ready for edible undies.

I'm not so certain that BY enjoyed having all those wives. He was about 45 after all when Old Joe bit the bullet and they did the same sex and opposite sex sealings on the Mississippi. When Joe died it seriously depressed BY, he really was unhinged and became a really mean cuss from the experiences he went through. He had really hard time making any kind of friends even with women.

Lucy Young his second or third wife had a big family which Brigham Jr. and John Young (the favorites) were apart of. But besides his two oldest sons, he didn't exactly go out of his way to make accommodations for the 50 something who followed after. The wives only had 1 kid a piece after his earlier wives. One of my Aunts (Margret Pierce) was married to him and she only had one or two kids from the old goat.

I just think BY did 'it' out of obligation not for enjoyment.

macaRomney Wrote:
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> I just think BY did 'it' out of obligation not for
> enjoyment.

I disagree. Whatever his personality, his penchant for going way beyond a moderate number of wives like many polygamists to today (3-6 but varies even year to year) shows he wanted to marry women. Painting his personality against the shear numbers seems senseless to me.

Kissinger once said "power is the ultimate aphrodisiac." I think that describes Young as well. The sex was probably rewarding, but so too was the control over other people. Some of his marriages were probably motivated by lust, others served dynastic political objectives, and still others were probably simple assertions of brute power over weaker people.

Why did he do it? Because he could.

was in a relationship with my ex and is still friends with my ex, my kids, and I, my ex likes "strange." I didn't know what that meant except for when watching "Two and a half men" and Charlie likes to have new women all the time. My ex likes "strange." No fun to keep having sex with the same man for the rest of his life.

And when we went to BY's house in St. George years ago, it said that he brought his youngest wife with him (her name I can't remember) to St. George. He only had time to father one child with each wife as he was moving on to the next woman as he was bored with the ones he had. He liked "strange." I'm kidding, but I wouldn't be surprised if that is how it worked itself out. If you asked someone who was polygamous, they'd probably tell you the same thing.

cl2 Wrote:
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> If
> you asked someone who was polygamous, they'd
> probably tell you the same thing.

I believe you are correct. The higher up a man is a leader the more he is to get more and more women. My grandfather had something like 60 when he died.

If you actually believe that, I have a bridge I'm certain you'd be interested in purchasing...