A nephew of mine is getting married in Oct. He met a mormon girl, converted, you guys know the rest...

They are doing the temple marriage, then a ring ceremony, then a luncheon, then a reception.

His parents are not mormon. His mother who so badly wants to see her oldest son get married, can't but her mom, sister, brother can. Mormonism didn't raise my nephew....his MOTHER did.

If mormons can draw that line, so can I. I will not be attending any functions for this marriage. If mormonism can shaft non-mo parents so bad, then I will not go out of my way to legitimize any of this. They have choices and so do I.

That all being said, I hope they have a long happy life together and during that life...se the REAL light

>>>If mormonism can shaft non-mo parents so bad, then I will not go out of my way to legitimize any of this.

Bravo.

I've gotten to that point too. I'm not going to participate anymore by going to any of their wedding activities. It enables the unacceptable way they exclude for the "main event."

A newly married couple can come visit me later. I'll tell them why I didn't respond to their wedding. They can think I'm a jerk, but maybe it will make them think about what their church had them do to the people they love.

It was more difficult than I thought, but by being there, I felt I was making a statement. She is MINE and they can have her for a few minutes in the temple, but in the end, she's MINE. And so I supported her. I got to get married in the temple because I wanted to, so I gave her the same right.

The thing is, your nephew doesn't have to get married in the temple FIRST NOW. He can choose to have the wedding and then go to the temple to be sealed afterwards. I asked my daughter when they made the change what she would have wanted and she said the temple.

I was doing fine with it until my aunt had to write a disgusting e-mail to me about it that I posted here back then. I let her know how horrible it was that she did that.

Otherwise, the day was a beautiful day and my daughter married who I had told her she would marry 6 years previously and she is SO HAPPY. He's a great guy and he thinks I'm fine as a heathen and so do his parents. I've known his family since before he was born.

What I would do if I were you--but this is just my opinion, go to wherever your aunt is and be with her. She needs you there to support her. She needs as big of a group as she can get to be with her that day. Believe me, I do know. ONLY SHE IS WORTHY TO BE AT HIS WEDDING. That is what I told my aunt. No one else was worthy to be there.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/22/2019 12:27PM by cl2.

It's been said here many times before but bears repeating as a reminder.
That 'main event' in the temple is such a let down. Some old high priest that the couple has probably never met voices a few platitudes about marriage and then recites a "sealing'. Be sure to look in the mirrors reflecting each other in eternity and then move along. There are other couples waiting in the assembly line.

Perhaps the most disturbing part is how most of those in attendance act like something really special just happened. To do otherwise would be to admit that a real wedding with everyone in attendance would be a happier event.

Exactly what I was going to say. The temple sealing is such a let down, the LDS are well advised to hide it.

I sent a couple of hundred bucks to my RM grandson, to get there right around the day of the wedding. I crafted a nice letter to accompany it. That was in mid-August.

So far not the slightest bit of acknowledgement, a month and a week later.

What are my odds now of ever getting a thank-you note?

Also, what the over/under on her being pregnant within three months?

You'll be waiting a very long time. Even though our gifts were way more than any UT TBM gift I've ever seen....

I thought they changed it so people could get married first then temple second.

That was just for rich people.

They did- sort of.

Yes, officially it's OK. But socially? Well, we all know how the Mormon mind works. A Temple-first marriage will always be touted as the only really acceptable kind.

kudos for getting married in the temple is going to do the "pretend" wedding first and then do the sealing. If it ever changes, it will be the next generation.

P.S. My daughter has been married 8 months and she isn't pregnant. She doesn't plan on it for a while and she is almost 34. She thinks she'll have ONE. She sure doesn't understand mormonism.

And I did tell my aunt that I KNOW what goes on in the temple. I didn't need her to spell it out. It was nothing special. In fact, the man talked so long, I about passed out from being on my knees that long.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/22/2019 04:52PM by cl2.

Keep in mind that Mormons are professional victims. They are conditioned to see any opposition to their cult’s insanity as religious persecution. That’s because their identity has been hijacked. Any “attack” on their religion is basically an “attack” on them.

If you call their religion stupid, you’re calling them stupid. They can’t inhabit the mental space where there’s nothing wrong with them, their religion actually is stupid.

So basically, you’re walking on eggshells. I dunno, maybe times call for a good pair of sh*t stompers.

I gave up going to Mormon wedding receptions, years ago. I've gotten invitations from within my huge TBM extended family, and I send an inexpensive gift from their registries, and happily pay for the shipping, so I don't have to go eat cake and punch, without a man, and be shunned by the Mormon couples who think I'm no more than a divorced apostate. It hurts, because I was once attached to these cousins. I do receive thank-you notes.

If someone makes a comment that I didn't attend a Mormon reception, I say, "It's not as if I were invited to the actual wedding, or anything."

Boundaries, lines in the sand, drawn by choice, remind us that we are in charge of our lives, and don't need to bow down to fake authority, or go along with lies.

Good for you!

exminion, your approach has real class!! I was still teetering on the brink of leaving the church when RM Son announced that he was going to be married in the temple. Nobody else in the family had the chance of an ice cube in Hell of getting a TR, and I thought that SOMEBODY should be there from the family. So I ante'd up tithing, attended meetings, and in general, behaved like a goody-two-shoes for a few months, survived interviews with the bishop and SP, and was there for Son's utterly forgettable wedding.

Just for the record, Son and his bride (now happily married for over a decade) had the last straw broken at the announcement about children of gay parents being denied any ordinances. They have left the church, along with the rest of us heathens.

I believe the rules "may " have changed a tiny bit. Not sure about that.

Are Mormons now allowed a civil ceremony first, then a temple sealing "soon" after?

If so, you may want to ask your nephew if he would consider this out of respect for his mother.

Just a thought.

Members no longer have to wait a full year if they were married in a civil service before going to the temple for a sealing.

I really wish that there had been this option from the get go. My SP made it crystal clear that he would punish me for choosing a civil marriage over the temple one. I was told that he might not find me worthy one year later. To him it was, you either do what's right (for the church and snub non-member family) or give in to social pressure and anger God.

For me, the entire temple marriage was forgettable. No flowers, special music or personal vows. I hated kneeling before an altar (I have bad knees from sport's injuries). Here I had saved myself for this once in a lifetime event and it was a downer for sure.

You are doing what common sense says should be done. That anyone troubles themselves over coming to your conclusion is what really should be remarkable.

I don't understand how people allow themselves to be degraded by waiting outside a ceremony of an organization that deems them "unworthy" to attend. Ditto for not attending any of the festivities.

I would be alarmed if you decided to do so.