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Posted by: schrodingerscat ( )
Date: January 11, 2020 03:17PM

Now if you go to Mormon.org it automatically sends you to www.comeuntochrist.org and the only way to contact the missionaries now is to sign up for a home visit and a free BoM. They make you enter your real name and address so you can have a pair of white and delightsome Agent Smiths pay you a visit to drop off a BoM, so you can read all about how much God hates Indians and its ok to take their land and put them on reservations.

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Posted by: messygoop ( )
Date: January 11, 2020 04:10PM

If they want to come into my house they'll have to wear their temple clothing. I have a dress code that I enforce. Moreover, they'll have to demonstrate the proper signs and tokens to enter my abode. I'll be waiting at the door with my hand stuck out. I have a little maltet hammer for such an occasion. :D



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/11/2020 04:10PM by messygoop.

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Posted by: Mother Who Knows ( )
Date: January 12, 2020 12:55AM

I love your ideas, Messygoop!

Yes, why not exercise our own dress codes. We have just as much right to do that as the Mormons do.

I have a haughty Mormon friend who makes everyone take off their shoes, before entering her home. I found this deliciously rude, when she told me she made the stake presidency take off their shoes, when they visited her. Her rule applies to all. No exceptions.

I had the sweetest, black lab, who would never bark or jump on anyone. When I was in the process of leaving the cult, we were love-bombed and stalked and threatened. Mormon men would come to our door in groups of two or three, late at night. The kids and I soon realized that the only way to handle this was to just yell through the door, "Stop banging. We are not going to open the door." Before that, we would open the door and let them in, mistakenly thinking these men were still our friendly Mormon neighbors. The minute they came in the door, my dog would press her big nose into everyone's crotch, one by one, and leave it there for a whole minute, while the man frantically tried to push her off, and keep talking at the same time. Hilarious!

Sorry to digress.

I don't think those people on the "Chat with a Missionary" feature are really young missionaries, like the ones people see on bicycles or walking around with backpacks and name tags. They are called and TRAINED with stock answers, and the right questions that SHOULD have been asked, etc. The cult just attaches the word "missionary" to this calling. Or, it used to. "Representative" is a more accurate word for these drones.

I'm surprised that they don't have a "choose your question" feature, like Amazon and other websites have. People can choose among the questions they SHOULD have asked, using the wording that the Mormons choose, and all the "screwy made-up stuff." The appropriate, Mormon-friendly, deflecting "answer" would then pop up, automatically. End of discussion. Any other questions? Select here.

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Posted by: messygoop ( )
Date: January 13, 2020 09:55AM

They had an entire array of potential missionary teaching scenarios in the 1988 Missionary Guide. We had to practice lessons of the church's commitment pattern.

According to the guide you had to discover doubts and concerns, then it was a matter of resolving their doubts.

ex. Mr. Jones doubt that Joe Smith was a prophet.

Resolution: Read a scripture that invites the spirit, then ask Mr. Jones to pray about it.

Of course, it never worked! But the missionaries always blame themselves instead of realizing the church peddles unwanted goods.

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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: January 11, 2020 05:54PM

The ‘chat with a representative’ feature is still there.

I was moving thru the website and all of a sudden it was there, at the bottom, asking me to give my first name. I was on the Church Lingo page...

Fearing a trick, I didn’t do it.

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Posted by: saucie ( )
Date: January 13, 2020 02:21PM

elderolddog Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The ‘chat with a representative’ feature is
> still there.
>
> I was moving thru the website and all of a sudden
> it was there, at the bottom, asking me to give my
> first name. I was on the Church Lingo page...
>
> Fearing a trick, I didn’t do it.


Be my guru. I would have never thought of that.

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Posted by: dumbmormons ( )
Date: January 11, 2020 06:07PM

It is a reaction to too many of us going on there and asking actual questions - not screwy make fun stuff, but actual doctrinal questions - and then posting the answers online.

When you ask an actual question knowing history and Doctrine and the response you get is way off the truth and even nonsensical and it is posted online for all to see..., it gets seen.

Stop the feature, stop actual answer like "The Book of Mormon is not History". "We don't believe in eternal progresssion". "Joseph Smith never used a rock in a hat - he didn't even have a hat".

Idiot stuff like that sure did not look good when copied and pasted into other discussion sites.

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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: January 11, 2020 06:39PM

In pursuit of an expression of reality, I offer the following, based on a quick online chat I had with a 'representative' Emily (wherever I can find her), in which she explains the reality behind Kori Cat's thread opening observation...

Chat is still available, but it doesn't present itself until they get a feeling that someone is curious (yellow):

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1AuQHMe39YMF4o5wTzAMVqki6Fg3sy7tWlVw7ugapFpQ/edit?usp=sharing

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Posted by: caffiend ( )
Date: January 11, 2020 11:28PM

elderolddog Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ...until they get a feeling that someone is
> curious (yellow):

Oh, you yellow dog you! How many on this board got that one, besides me? How many actually saw it?

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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: January 11, 2020 11:56PM

Were you two for two? Did you get the other parenthesized reference?

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Posted by: caffiend ( )
Date: January 13, 2020 02:18PM

Actually, I sort of recognized it, but dismissed it because your phrasing was a slight departure, and I thought you might have dealt with a genuine "Emily," whom you chatted with once, but was never available (by that name) for a follow-up discourse.

But yes, it did come to my notice, somewhat.

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Posted by: bobofitz ( )
Date: January 13, 2020 11:21PM

Hi EOD. Old Swedish film and Simon and Garfunkel song...both from our youth I believe. Never saw the film but heard the song many times. I miss the late 60’s....being a rebellious BYU fringie. It was so easy to feel naughty without really hurting yourself too much. That all came later I guess. Keep your head down.

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Posted by: messygoop ( )
Date: January 11, 2020 11:17PM

1. Hi, my Bible says that Jesus is coming any day now soon, but he will not show up unless his church is the wealthiest on Earth. Has your leader recently revealed how much money it has at its disposal?

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Posted by: Dave the Atheist ( )
Date: January 11, 2020 11:39PM

It's because of magnets.

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Posted by: messygoop ( )
Date: January 13, 2020 09:44AM


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Posted by: Chicken N. Backpacks ( )
Date: January 13, 2020 12:23PM

There have been several news items about Facebook content reviewers, who to sit and go through thousands of hours of video to determine if someone is outside of guidelines for sex, abuse, violence, and other gross/horrible stuff. It makes many workers sick and weeping from sensory overload.

I'll bet something similar happens to "well-trained" idealistic Mo'ssionaries after they get trolled for the hundredth time.

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Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: January 13, 2020 12:41PM

Testimonies form like callouses do. The more friction the stronger they grow.

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