https://i.redd.it/uwjji6gstdb41.png


This totally speaks to the "Get'em while they're dumb!!" approach to missionary work.



Also, Southern Californians have a lot about which to be proud! That's right, Saucie and I couldn't have done it without a little help!

Also, no Areas opened, four closed in 2019.

The church is imploding in California. Five missions have closed in the past two years.

Three missions closed in 2019 (Rancho Cucamonga, Carlsbad, Long Beach) plus the two in 2018 (Modesto, San Fernando).

It looks like they were originally going to close the Irvine mission, but chose instead to shutter Carlsbad.

https://www.sltrib.com/religion/2019/01/02/mormon-church-open-new/

Looks like our recent poster threatening us with his "LDS clout" in California (among other places) was, um, somewhat misguided in his delusions.

Perhaps they have already converted everyone in those areas. I'm sure that is it. Has to be since they are the fastest growing church. I know this because the Mormons I know say so.

Being a SoCal native, I know there's a lot more to do than go to long, boring EllDeeEss stuff.

Having said that, some of the ginchiest girls in high were those mormon babes.

Ginchy? Mormon girls?

You needed to get out more.

Well if C'n'B meant that form of the word, yes, we are in agreement. Perhaps my vocabulary is skewed in favor of the younger generation.

C'n'B is indeed. . . venerable.

elderolddog Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> https://i.redd.it/uwjji6gstdb41.png
>
>
> This totally speaks to the "Get'em while they're
> dumb!!" approach to missionary work.
>
>
>
> Also, Southern Californians have a lot about which
> to be proud! That's right, Saucie and I couldn't
> have done it without a little help!

Thanks for all the help... look at the progress!!!!!!
Elderolddog and I are celebrating... Yay.

I think the RfM community needs to call EOD and Saucie on an ex-Mormon mission given their demonstrated influence over more gullible SoCalians. Would you be willing to spend a couple of years in balmy Orem?

Sure, it would entail personal sacrifice, but I don't think Utah would ever be the same. We need you two; ex-Mo God needs you.

I would happily prepare a number of care packages and would even be willing to organize your homecoming festivities at the conclusion of your sentence--I mean, mission.

Think of the cause, Dear Saucie. Think.of.the.cause!

Think of the sauce! Think of the source. Insouciantly ;-)



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 01/18/2020 03:31PM by Soft Machine.

I served my mission in the Utah, Salt Lake City North mission. If they close Utah North and Utah South, that means that there should be no fulltime missionaries in Utah. I can't imagine the church doing that. By closing Idaho and some parts of California also, it looks like they're shutting down the whole Mormon corridor to missionary work. Is that really what they're doing? My mission president used to stand in his office accross the street from temple square, point out the window to temple square and say "that is where Satin has his headquarters too. That's why they need us here" (fulltime missionaries in Utah).

I think they merely closed Utah in terms of administrative areas, but not to missionary work. Right?

When I was in the Utah, Salt Lake City North mission in the 1980s, the mission boundaries went from downtown Salt Lake City, up to Green River Wyoming, and in to parts of Idaho. You have to have a mission home and a support structure to support the missionary work (regular meetings, accountability,reporting, etc). Over two-hundred young missionaries needed to be managed. To close any business down administratively while keeping everyone working is not practical, even with a volunteer workforce. You still need management and financing also, especially when most of your sales force are young men in the prime of their lives and can be driven to break rules if they think they can get away with it. Someone also has to provide mission cars, meet the missionaries at the airport and assign them to their work areas, transfer them, rent their apartments, etc.. If you take away the administration, it wouldn't be long before they got the church in to big trouble on an wholesale basis.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/18/2020 10:03PM by azsteve.

The Utah missions are still there. The church combined three administrative areas in Utah into one.


https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/church/news/first-presidency-announces-2019-area-leadership-assignments?lang=eng&_r=1

"The First Presidency also announced that seven areas in the United States and Canada will be combined into three areas.

Effective August 1, the North America Northwest Area and the North America West will combine to become the North America West Area. The Idaho Area and North America Central Area will become the North America Central Area. And the Utah North Area, Utah Salt Lake City Area, and Utah South Area will combine to become the Utah Area."

In other words, the church is downsizing its missions. In a mission, you have no ward houses or stake centers that need to be sold off when there are fewer people participating. You just close a few mission homes and small offices and then merge administrative areas and run an over-all smaller operation over an equally sized geographic area. So in an area like all of Utah, instead of having six hundred to eight hundred missionaries total, you might have one or two hundred missionaries covering the same sized geographic area. This increases efficiencies while officially recognizing that fewer people are buying-in to the church's bullshit.

Personally, I am not sure why they had so many missionaries in Utah to begin with. On my fulltime mission to Utah, we taught mostly eight year old children who were going to be forced to join the church, whether the missionaries taught them or not. Of the adults that I did teach, a friend or neighbor typically ended up baptizing them anyway. The members often resented us because they wanted to teach their person themselves since so many of them were returned missionaries and could give the discussions correctly too. But we had the calling and thus the special spiritual powers (theoretically), so the church wanted us to do the teaching. I pointed this out to a stake president once (showing him the official handbook) and he asked me to leave his home. It was every member a mission president there. You never knew who was watching and judging you. I learned to hate hearing the phrase "...well on my mission...".

This move doesn't have anything to do with missions. They are combining areas - which are the administrative level of the church above stakes.

The missions in Utah haven't changed.

I can remember when Lucifer would show up at the Salt Lake Temple wearing a cool black apron and he had a minister sidekick working for him.

The son of a friend of mine was just called to serve a mission in Bulgaria. What's the point? Does LDS Inc. really think it's worth their while to send missionaries to Bulgaria? Will there be more success there than in Carlsbad, CA?

Constantine (Cyril) and Methodius, inventors of what later became the Cyrillic alphabet, started out as Christian missionaries to what is now Bulgaria. At least he's following in historic footsteps.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saints_Cyril_and_Methodius

That's very interesting! Unfortunately the Mormon missionaries have nothing of value to offer the people of Bulgaria. I doubt the missionaries will have any success, although as far as missions go, Bulgaria would be a very interesting place to spend 2 years, especially since tracting is no longer allowed in most missions.

...Teach English, visit ALL the touristy sites and read Bulgarian comic books, to really get to know the people and their ethos.

Maybe get married, start a family... It's only two years, so you'd have to have a plan...

I spent a total of nearly 17 months in Korea in the military in the early 1970's--and missed the chance to learn Korean, surrounded by native speakers. Still regret that fifty years later.
Just one of many missed opportunities.

heartbroken Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> That's very interesting! Unfortunately the Mormon
> missionaries have nothing of value to offer the
> people of Bulgaria. I doubt the missionaries will
> have any success, although as far as missions go,
> Bulgaria would be a very interesting place to
> spend 2 years, especially since tracting is no
> longer allowed in most missions.

Converting people is only a secondary purpose of sending out missionaries across the world; the real prize is to keep the missionaries themselves in the church for their entire lives, paying tithing. The best way to do that is to send them out with a purpose in defending the church and are forced to be reliant on it, cementing their belief, reinforcing their unquestioning adherence to whatever stupid rules are imposed on them, and making it very very hard for them to even consider leaving the church in the future. Thus the scam continues.

Edit: I totally didn't realize this is two years old!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/30/2022 03:45PM by Anziano Young.

hahaha! You fell for my trap!

Maybe they're low on funds for MP offices & stipends.

/sarcasm

It seems that they are shutting down missions in more prosperous areas, and opening them in poorer areas. Sounds about right.

There is something to be said about the mormon church being a subsistence level religion. This point of view certainly doesn’t flatter its staunch adherents, does it?

But it does explain why the church’s only notable growth occurs where it does.

It also highlights another real possibility: mormon ghawd is a real dumbass.

Not surprising at all. There is a positive correlation between economic wealth and educational opportunity, and a negative correlation between economic wealth and fertility rates. Both are bad news for ChurchCo, so they must out of necessity expand their operations in economically poor areas if they wish to continue growing. And grow they must, since they've trumpeted for so long that they will fill the world.

There is a temple there. I thought the purpose of temples is the bring people closer to God. So it looks like they built it but its not drawing new members Wasn't there a movie about building a baseball field and they will come? Guess that dos not applies to temple.

Hell, there's a dozen or so temples in Utah, and they closed two missions here!

Seems to be the focus is on temples and genealogy work more than proselytizing missions. The next problem will be temple burnout.

When I grew up I was thought that Utah was Zion. How have they closed 2 missions in Zion?

Two thoughts...

1. They may have decided that everyone who is going to convert, has.

When I was out harvesting Brown people in a white field, one of our 'get their attention' routines was the 'Two Questions' approach, "What do you know about the mormon church?" followed by "Would you like to know more?"

In Utah, unfortunately for the church, the answer to the first question is "Too goddam much!!" Thus the second question becomes anticlimactic. It's either going to be 'NO!' or 'Hey, if I do, I'll ask my neighbor/whatever/etc.'

2. It's a numbers game, with regard to the missionaries. The number of youngsters heading out has to be decreasing as the days march on. Baptisms per Missionary is probably distressingly low in Zion, and I don't want to name names or point fingers, but the *quality* of the converts is, per rumors I've heard, not all that White nor Delightsome.

So send the available bodies where they have a better chance of dunking a higher stratum of the local scene, in order to improve the caliber of the future exmo.


When my grandson was out (and quite possibly the only of the three TBM-parented boys who will go), based on the photos accompanying the P-day data dump, the Elders' interests were unusual insects, abominable accommodations and how popular they were with the members. Oh yeah, and how successful Satan was at turning investigators into former investigators.

Which was the crux of the statistics (in my mind): The more knowledge a community has regarding today's mormonism, the less likely the mishies will have any real success.

Yeah knowledge!

They have already lowered the mission age to 18 for the boys they can't lower it anymore. For the girls the age got lowered to 19 I guess they could lover it even more to 18. The lds church is loosing young adults and even shortening the Sunday service to 2 hours will not bring more people in. Next they could shorten early morning seminary? Utah received more temples but closes 2 missions? Now women can be witnesses in the temple. No more scouting.

I was surprised that the Japan Sendai Mission closed. It was by far the highest baptizing mission in the late 1980's, at least by a factor of 2 over the second highest baptizing mission, and they weren't "baseball baptisms".

I was there and I feel bad for the people I converted. I will always feel bad about one young woman who never married because there weren't enough "worth priesthood holders". I am partially responsible for her living a lonely life without a family. Damn church!

What makes you think her life is lonely? Or that people with families aren't lonely? Matrimonial chauvinism!

I helped to convert my Mexican, non-English speaking friend and her husband. He later became an alcoholic and drug user, and they divorced (they had 4 kids). Ultimately, he died of a heart attack, and I will always feel a twinge of guilt that their conversion might have played a part in his ultimate demise.

I seem to relish watching the mormon church implode. It's like a fish that somehow flung itself out of the water and is floundering around on the ground trying to stay alive. Normally I would feel sorrow for this helpless fish, but in this case it is a piranha that preys on other fish and, in my opinion, is just fine flip flopping around. I won't kick it back into the water, I'll just step over it and be on my way.

Are they still preaching that we are "the fastest growing church?".

subeamnotlogedin Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Are they still preaching that we are "the fastest
> growing church?".


Probably not. But if you ask Google, "fastest growing church + mormons", this is the first response I got:

    "CBN.com - Mormonism is the
    fastest growing faith group
    in American history according
    to 'U.S. News & World Report',
    which reports that if present
    trends continue there could be
    265 million members of the
    Church of Jesus Christ of
    Latter-day Saints (LDS) world-
    wide by 2080."
--https://www1.cbn.com/churchandministry/mormons-are-fastest-growing-religion

There's no date given anywhere regarding what issue of U.S. News it comes from, but I am pretty sure it's from back in the 1990s Dark Ages.


Then there's this one from 2012!

    "A new survey shows that
    mainline Protestants, the
    religious group that has
    dominated America’s religious
    terrain for most of the
    country’s existence, and
    Catholics, the largest single
    denomination in the country,
    may be beginning to ceding
    size and influence to new
    religious groups.

    "The 2012 Religious Congrega-
    tions and Membership Survey
    (RCMS), released on May 1,
    shows that the Church of
    Jesus Christ of Latter-day
    Saints (in other words,
    Mormonism) reported 2 million
    new adherents and new congre-
    gations in 295 counties where
    no Mormons lived a decade ago,
    making Mormonism the fastest-
    growing religious group in the
    United States. Muslims came in
    second, with growth of 1
    million adherents in 197 new
    counties.
--https://www.prri.org/spotlight/study-shows-that-mormons-are-the-fastest-growing-religious-group-in-the-u-s/


There are a couple of other such studies from early in the 2010s that seem to be impressed with the church's 'growth', but I don't see that any attempt has been made to take into account the level of member activity. Not to mention resignations!

Personally, I can't believe that anyone would be amped up to the point of joining the church, based on the available membership numbers. Especially when 2019's figures are reviewed, in which there is a good basis for declaring that while the gross numbers increased, the percentage of the human population connected to mormonism actually fell.


There! Aren't you glad you asked? On the other hand, I have to do something between plays! Gonna be a great second half!!

subeamnotlogedin Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Are they still preaching that we are "the fastest
> growing church?".

Every religion I ever encountered, from islam to the Hare Krishnas and various other sects of buddhism and christianity, make that claim. Every bleeding one.

When Starlink has 100% of the face of the Earth covered by satellite internet access, they’ll be closing a lot more missions.

Ensign Peak Advisors hedge fund for Rusty holds lots of tech stocks which are the backbone of the Internet which is the bane of existence for Rusty and his so-called church. The is the great patriarchal paradox that must be blowing Rusty's Mormon mind?

...a shrinking church requires growth stocks...

Quite the revelation!

Imagine if Joseph Smith had 1,800 coordinated satellites orbiting the Earth and the ability to connect people to Starlink via Neuralink.

https://www.cnbc.com/2022/01/06/spacex-starlink-internet-service-has-more-than-145000-users-so-far.html

https://neuralink.com/

Starlink is a satellite based ISP. That doesn’t make it powerful. It is a cheap way to provide internet to thinly populated regions. If anything, it will probably be on the slow side, just because of the distances involved and low transmitter power.

As for Neuralink, that looks pretty much like aspirational software, if not pure vaporware.

Not sure how either of these would have enabled JS. The current instantiation of the internet reaches much of the world, and does not seem to be doing LDS Inc any favors, beyond giving people something to read during boring Sac Meeting talks.