I'm sitting in my old ward building as we speak. Came to interfaith concert to support my sister who helps organize it. LDS host it. Didn't realize it was my old chapel til I got here (I'm bad with addresses) And it's been a while. Instant aversion reaction when I walked in. Greeters offered me tour of building and answers to questions about their faith lol.

Finally met LDS woman my sister works with in the interfaith group, who she doesn't care for. "She always has to be in charge of everything and it bugs me" sis says.

Also, she gives a list of "Do Nots" at the opening of every event. No smoking. No coffee. No. No. No. "Who else thinks they have to tell people how to behave in church?" Sis asks. "Tells you all you need to know about their theology" I replied.

LDS lady just introduced sis to the SP. Didn't include me although I'm sitting right next to her. Oh well. I don't rate. No tears from me.

We're in the enormous room with the b-ball court. Perfect for setting up a cold weather shelter. But oh yeah. We don't do that kind of thing.

Scads of chairs set up. Must be crowd coming. Wonder if there'll be a musical number from the Hare Krishna folks. There was at the last concert. It just went on and on sis said lol.

Feeling weird beefing about them in their own building. Signing off now. Hope no mishies snag me in the hall later. They're circling.

Hang in there, NG. You are more courageous than I!

So far, you're doing great. Circulate, talk to people, find out what you can. For example, are they uncomfortable with the word "Mormon?"

Tell them you're no longer a Mormon. Try, "Back when I was a Mormon, we were here for three-hour blocks. What do you think of the two-hour blocks?"

Things like that. "Inquiring minds" and all that, you know!

Can you wear a T-shirt to those things? I would like to make one that says “I went back to church and all I got was this lousy T-shirt”. Plus maybe some graphics of a temple and an illustration of the sure sign of the nail.

I came back ... to brylcreem.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YCtW8-bUvY



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/01/2020 10:34PM by Dave the Atheist.

Carl Sagan says Brylcreem is God. I'm with Sagan.








PS. What is Brylcreem?

Are all the gals going for you now or did that only work in the 1950s?

I'll bet EOD uses that stuff.

All the gals going for me now but they just don't know it.

Use more Brylcreem!

I watched the following clip as well.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rm62Nt1JZ6E

Wood Nymph? Right Guard? Sivilkrin?

"Speidel twistoflex watch bands!"

"Kool cigarettes, real menthol magic!"

"Brylcreem, a little dab'll do ya!"

Wow, you 1970s guys rock. I fear the rest of us will never experience something like that. And yes, I spotted EOD standing in the background as an extra in the Wood Nymph ad. He was wearing his missionary glasses although not, sadly, his hula skirt.

Lot's Wife Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Are all the gals going for you now or did that
> only work in the 1950s?
>
> I'll bet EOD uses that stuff.


You know you had a really great night out when you brush your teeth with Brylcreem the next morning!

And misprounce it, just like I've spelled it.

If they ask what your interest is, tell them you're asking for a friend ... A Lamanite who lives the small neck of land between the two waters...

My uncle always claimed that brylcreem made his hair shine when he was a teen but it also drew horseflies to him.
Better horseflies than being in a Ward House attracting Mormons though.

A bucolic image came to my mind as well. Sometimes a breeze wafts a big annoying insect in from the cow pasture. You can get a newspaper and squash it, but that's a lot of effort for something so trivial. . . Usually the pest will lose interest and fly away on its own.

Brilliant! I love someone so creative as to copy my post word-for-word and then post it as his own!

But tell me, weren't you Enchilada Deluxe earlier today? You know, when you copied my sentence word for word and tried but failed to change the pronouns appropriately. A bit embarrassing, that must have been.

I guess you did better on this occasion. It's probably easier when you don't try to change any words. Was that your idea or did you get someone to help you?

D'oh!



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 02/01/2020 11:48PM by Lot's Wife.

Oh you are abundantly fecund—and not just from the pasture.

Semi-sincere 2nd degree or something?

(Yikes! Stop me before I overalliterate or something!)

Vitalis was nearly pure alcohol. *LOL*

Of course, we could return this thread to Nightingale and find out if she has anything more to report about her visit to her old ward.

Thread hijack !

John Mulaney is a time traveler!

Does it smell the same?

You are brave. I had to go into my old ward building to vote, the first year I was out, and I had flashbacks, which made me angry that I had to go in there to vote. I exhaled, and walked across the basketball gym to the sign-up table, and the lady there said loudy, "We miss seeing you at church!"

Please let us know how your evening progresses.

> I exhaled

Yes, but did you inhale?

You don't want to inhale in those buildings.

Had to laugh about the No No No lecture from the LDS host/guard of the building. Mormons are really big on letting you know what is prohibited. And they feel a serious need to prohibit stuff.

My favorite example of that was back in the day, if you wanted to buy a single drink in Utah, you had to buy the whole bottle, from a state liquor store. Not a problem. The front desk at the restaurant was licensed as a state liquor branch, and they carried mini-bottles.

Then the poobahs realized that a mini bottle is 1.7 ounces, which is a really stiff drink. Plus precise measuring/accounting collars were being produced that could monitor the number and size of a pour from a full sized bottle, so the poobahs decided that the peasantry could be allowed to buy liquor by the drink in a restaurant. Thank you, guv Huntsman. Jeez.

However, if the Mormons were going to give the heathens something, they had to take something away. That something was the mini bottle. As far as I am aware, in every other state, if you want to buy a mini bottle of something, you can. There are lots of reasons why you might want to. You have a recipe that calls for an ounce or two. You just want to try it to see if you like it. You can't stand the stuff, but a guest is coming over who likes a particular liquor, so you get a mini or two. Whatever.

But noooooo, not in Utah. Mini bottles were outlawed when liquor by the drink became legal. Prohibiting things is Very Important to Mormons.

Second story - I've told this before, but it's been long enough a rerun shouldn't hurt. Nurse moves to Utah, gets a job doing blood drives in outlying communities. By outlying, I mean places like Fillmore and Monticello, not West Valley City.

So, her first blood drive, being hosted in the lobby of the local LDS ward house. She walks in with a cup of coffee. She was immediately and nervously informed that she could not drink coffee in the building. The lady telling her this looked terrified and afraid to inhale lest she suck in coffee fumes. Oh, the horror.

OK. She goes outside to finish the coffee, comes in and tosses the cup in the trash. Guess what? You can't throw a coffee cup into an LDS trash can. So after being treated like she had taken a dump on the lobby carpet, for the second time in a half hour, she retrieved her cup and put it in her car. And decided Mormons were deeply weird.

"No No No" brought that fond memory back.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/02/2020 12:18AM by Brother Of Jerry.

I agree with forestpal, you are brave. For going in after seeing it was a Mormon church. I can't imagine doing that what I know.

I went back a little over a year ago for my daughter's wedding. I didn't think standing outside the temple (I didn't get there until the sealing was done) would be so difficult. I had been married in that there temple! It was horrible. Being at the stake center wasn't as bad.

I get to go back every now and then for funerals. I only go to my family members' funerals. Some aren't in stake centers. I walk around my old stake center with my dogs as "usually" the walks are cleared of snow, but I DO NOT GO IN. I was thinking I hadn't been in there in a long time, but they had my daughter's bridal shower there, so I guess I did.

I hope the program was worth the lovely mormon experience.

Apologies, Nightingale, for my contribution to this epic thread hijack. I for one would love to hear about the rest of your evening if you have a chance to write it up.

We went back to church a year or so ago although not for a specific event. A member of our old ward was repeatedly using F&T meeting to say derogatory things about our little family and we were getting regular reports, even recordings, of those "testimonies" from friends. The speeches were inappropriate personal attacks with the names of our kids and their schools, etc. Since this member is close to the ward leadership, no one did anything to stop the calumnies.

so I emailed the SP and said we wanted to meet to discuss what was happening. He asked us to show up at his office during sacrament meeting, so we dressed in "corporate casual" fashion, respectful but not at all Mormon, and appeared as planned. We were ten minutes early, so we sat in the hallway and watched the meeting of our old ward, including the leaders who had permitted the slanderous testimonies. It was strange. Both of us felt a bit of anxiety seeing the old faces, which was surprising because we have dealt with all the problems in the assertive manner with which RfM is familiar, but I guess a lifelong sense of community leaves its mark. We also sensed the old gloom, as we saw people sitting sullenly and listening to vapid talks. It was the same old ward but we were now alien visitors, a somewhat hostile presence.

The SP invited us into his office. The SP wanted to chit chat at first to build rapport, asking about our jobs and educational backgrounds, our children and their activities. We answered those questions so succinctly that he realized we didn't want to discuss personal matters; we were there for the single purpose of stopping the harassment. Thus we explained what had occurred, and the SP said that yes, he had heard one such diatribe and that it was not proper. We proceeded to say that the ward leadership was derelict, and he tacitly but not explicitly agreed. He said he would instruct the bishops of all the wards in the stake that our critic should not be allowed to speak from the pulpit in any way. We thanked him and left.

Since then we, parents and children, have not been troubled. The SP was as good as his word. It was from our perspective another lesson in the need to address the church politely but firmly, in the manner of an unsentimental business meeting. Part of me thinks the SP is probably a good man and that it might have been nice to get more of a sense of him, but that might have weakened the boundary between the church and us. And establishing and maintaining such boundaries is the key to recovery.

Which is my long-winded way of asking Nightingale to retail more of her experience and impressions.

You wore some kind of floral print!

I can just see you...

Tell me you wore white gloves and I'll stand up and run full speed into a wall.

That's a lie. I'll do it sitting down.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/02/2020 04:31PM by elderolddog.

How'd you guess?

A floral print dress with a white lace collar and white cuffs plus a white pearl necklace, the white gloves I use for playing bridge and a matching handbag. I thought about a summer bonnet but that would have violated church rules so I just took a few hat pins in case we needed something to encourage the SP to act as we wanted.

Say hello to the wall for me. Perhaps Saucie would be willing to accelerate your wheel chair to ensure an energetic encounter. Pics, please!

I took special note of your remark,

" Both of us felt a bit of anxiety seeing the old faces, which was surprising because we have dealt with all the problems in the assertive manner with which RfM is familiar, but I guess a lifelong sense of community leaves its mark."

Interesting how these old engrams (oops! I mean, programming) can still affect us. This offers some insight when we read posters (new ones, especially) who seem too easily bothered by the cultic triggers. Did you ever contact the bishop, or did you go straight to the SP? If so, may I ask why?

Lot's Wife: Pearls are for style, not clutching.

No worries, LW. I'm happy to see people having fun. And I'm guilty myself of diverting a thread or two. Fortunately, there's room now that threads can go to 60 posts. Carry on.

And yes, I'm going to return and report. Just taking a bit of time to process it all. Bottom line: I won't do *that* again in a hurry.

I look forward to it. I love your insights!

WOW, I would get nauseous going inside their building. I bet you were shaking and then when they starting speaking in cult words, sister this, president that, garments, Mormon joseph smith and the profit

Speaking of Mormon male alcohol from the 50s and 60s (e.g. Vitalis), two words:

Jade East.

Apologizing in advance for the derivative hijack.

You're not going to mention Hai Karate ? It had a fairly good smell.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jtwh3nQP5Uo