A friend told me this joke today:

If you get an email with the title "Knock, Knock", don't open it. It's a Jehovah's Witness working from home.

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Of course, some bright exmo could very likely come up with one about knocking on heaven's door, aka the temple veil. I vaguely recall some knocking going on there.


A little levity in the Age of COVID.

We sure as heck need it.

This is really funny...we both broke into simultaneous, instantaneous, laughter.

Thank you, Nightingale!!

:D



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/03/2020 12:13AM by Tevai.

In Canada, there is the "do not call list".
I wonder why we don't have a "do not visit people door to door" law.

~~~~iceman9090

So if it's knock knock knock knock pound pound pound look in windows knock knock it's the mormons?

Heartless you read my mind!

OMG. So true. Two days ago my doorbell rang. I opened the door and didn't see anyone around.

Then a few minutes later it rang again. Some older man and woman wanted to know if So'n'so lived here. I said no. They said, he lives in the basement. Uhhhh. I told them no. (Apparently at some point in the past, this house had renters.)

I said, "Please step back" since they were getting too close to my closed storm door. They said, "We're from the Church of Jesus Christ of Yadda Yadda!" I cut them off before they could finish and said, "Please stay away."

So here's what's funny. After they rang the doorbell the first time, they took it upon themselves to go looking in windows and looking for a basement door around the house. Creepy!

Why on earth did they pick now to track down some kid who lived here maybe a year ago. They are hardly an "essential service." Plus, being 60+, they ought to have some sense to stay away from random places. But no. They have to do their darn church crap.

Nighty, that was the best joke I've seen in a long time. I've already spread it like wildfire to everyone I know. Thanks for the belly laugh. I needed it.

Their spirit of God is a corona fever burning.

They don't know where I live...thankfully..

For Mormons, it’s not “knock knock, who’s there,” it’s “tap tap tap, what is wanted?”



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/03/2020 10:21AM by CrispingPin.

Knock, Knock
Who's there?
Delighted!
Delighted who?
De Lighted Pen!

Ha! Clever.

WHO's there.

https://www.who.int/emergencies/diseases/novel-coronavirus-2019/events-as-they-happen

https://twitter.com/WHO?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1245757324519563266&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.who.int%2Femergencies%2Fdiseases%2Fnovel-coronavirus-2019%2Fevents-as-they-happen

Thanks all, for making this a fun thread. I know the times are serious yet laughing is therapeutic.

I appreciate the swerve to making the joke fit Mormonism too. I knew someone/s could convert it to amuse us.

My friend who told me the joke was a little hesitant as he knows I was a JW and thought maybe I wouldn't appreciate it. Fortunately for me, I am *so* over it and yes, I laughed. Without malice. Rather, I'm sorry for anyone stuck in a belief system that stifles their potential in life. As a JW, I had fun, we had parties, I liked the people I knew there and I went on plenty of dates with nice young men. One of them I even still think about. Contrary to what many seem to think, although more isolated than Mormons, in my experience JWs have more fun within themselves. I know it's not like that for 100% of their members - there are plenty of accounts of child abuse and other horrors. Also, some die due to the no transfusion rule. And they miss out on their own potential future as higher education is discouraged. Obviously, that limits one's job choices. But there's plenty in Mormonism that's worse, in my opinion, having seen both sects up close. With JWs there's no bishop's interviews (or equivalent thereof), no eternal progression, no history of polygamy, no extraneous "scripture", no obsession with the moon (!), no secret temple rites, no mandatory callings (although to be in good standing you're expected to do the door to door thing) and no secret handshakes or unique Mormon underwear.

I just didn't find being a JW to be mind-bending in the way that Mormonism was, at least for me. There are similarities in that both have the male founder (with JWs it's Charles T. Russell, a "Christian minister") and the quasi-Christian ethos. In my opinion (admittedly fairly unlearned in this regard), the JW beliefs are closer to Christianity than is Mormon theology, which made it more palatable and relatable to me.

Anyway, I like the joke. It's not snarky or mean but actually gentle, clever and amusing.

And we need to laugh. I believe it's the best medicine, as they say (unless you are the 1001st person in line in a field hospital and there's only 1000 ventilators. Then the appropriate medical equipment would trump any joke on earth, it goes without saying, of course). Drastic comparison but obviously the worldwide situation is on my mind as I sit here pondering how much I really need to venture out to the grocery store today. Previously, I wouldn't have to think twice about it.

You guys are fun. Thanks for that.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 04/03/2020 02:56PM by Nightingale.

This is good news for introverted JW's. I know that they're very vicious to members who don't want to do tracting.
I could never go door to door. After I got baptized and was in church a while, they started trying to get me to do a calling. I didn't want to.
They didn't force me; they knew that I was really shy and wasn't just trying to get out of it. I did help in the church library ( I did love that, plus I was always checking out books and videos anyway)
When we moved out of state , my new ward there wasn't understanding.
They were politely calling me selfish for not serving and stuff.
I did do visiting teaching in the first church because they gave me a partner who didn't mind doing all of the talking.
I can't imagine going door to door, especially as a JW.