Can you see that scene, at 5:01 p.m., when you teleport from your office into your living room, where that evening's wife yells from the kitchen, "Is that you, Snookums? Dinner is right on schedule, thanks to all the Cherubim!!! Can I get you a mocktail, you big hunk of macho mio?"
You know you will roll your eyes after 12 millennium of this...
But seriously, what do the fine Relief Society presidents of this world have to say about life in the CK, as Mrs. Ghawd #1, when they have even just 50 co-wives?
Do they each get a mansion? How often are they allowed to redecorate? What if the Pool Boy (a smoothie, of course) develops a mean backhand with a sawed-off pool stick? Gross, huh? But we all have needs, right?
I don't think that as a fine, upstanding mormon wife, I would want to think too much about ... Eternity!! Hey, don't for a second think that I wouldn't have made a wonderful mormon wife! I'm not the least bit afraid of surgery, when it's for a good cause!!
What happens when we get there and everybody has the same "NEW" name?
This seems to be another thing God didn’t think out too well. Can you imagine you finally get to the Celestial Kingdom, make reservations at the best restaurant, Chez Joseph, the maître d’ calls out, “Elijah, party of two,” and ten thousand people start to follow the waiter to the table? Mormon heaven would just turn into an endless stream of “Hi, I’m Ishmael.” “Nice to meet you Ishmael; I’m Ishmael too. Come and meet my friend Ishmael; Ishmael, he’s the one over there by Hagar, my wife.” “Hey what a coincidence. My wife is Hagar too. And my daughter. Wow. Small kingdom, huh?”