Recovery Board  : RfM
Recovery from Mormonism (RfM) discussion forum. 
Go to Topic: PreviousNext
Go to: Forum ListMessage ListNew TopicSearchLog In
Posted by: CrispingPin ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 12:54PM

About a year ago in my neighborhood, a young woman died from a self-inflicted gunshot wound. The next morning, I was walking my dog past the spot where it happened (I walk my dog twice a day, and this was on one of my regular routes). In the time between the incident and my morning walk, an inch or so of snow had fallen. The sidewalk was dry, but the grass between the sidewalk and the street was covered with snow. My dog started sniffing the snow covered grass in a very determined fashion. I had to tug on the leash several times to get him to continue with the walk. The next morning, I walked past the spot again, and there was an area of grass about three feet wide and eight feet long that was completely covered with blood.

Back when I was somewhat of a believer, my wife would often question the story of Nephi killing Laban. Not only the fact that God commanded Nephi to commit cold blooded murder, but how could Nephi decapitate Laban and steal his clothes without the clothes being completely blood soaked.

I saw a photograph of the woman who died near my house. She was trim, and appeared to be somewhat petite. I don’t know how big Laban allegedly was, but I would have to assume that chopping an adult man’s head off would produce more blood that a single gunshot to a trim woman.

The story of Laban is not only immoral, it’s also illogical.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: thedesertrat1 ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 01:18PM

Is it also possibly not based on fact?

As Gibbs in NCIS would say
"Do you think?"



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/25/2021 01:20PM by thedesertrat1.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 01:26PM

The deed was done on a hillside and Nephi cleverly position Laban's body with the top of the spine towards the crest and the feet towards the bottom of the hill. Without the heart pumping, the blood in the body obeyed the Law of Gravity and it all stayed in the body.

Clever guy, that Nephi. But then he came from goodly parents, so he had that going for him.

So now that we've cleared this up, see you in church on Sunday, Bro. CrispingPin!

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: CrispingPin ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 01:40PM

Now that you have reproved me with righteousness, I will repent and return.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 01:42PM

Just don't let him make you go down.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 01:48PM

Oh, we WILL go down!

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 02:42PM

Well this is awkward.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: scmd1 ( )
Date: February 27, 2021 01:41PM

I'm mostly down with this, but why would a heart instantly stop beating just because the associated head was disarticulated?

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: February 27, 2021 01:53PM

Hey, Doc! Good to see you!

If ... if the brain has to send an impulse for every systolic pulse the heart makes, why wouldn't the heart stop beating when the internet between the brain and the heart goes down?

If the muscles involved do continue to 'beat', I think it highly unlikely that much in the way of research has been done to find the average number of beats the heart makes after it loses its connection to the brain.

But then I never really tried to probe all that with which Dr. Mengele was involved.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: scmd1 ( )
Date: February 27, 2021 04:15PM

If Laban had normal (normal BEFORE the beheading, anyway) cardiac function, electrical impulses produced by the sinoatrial node should have kept his heart beating long enough to have drenched the clothing. A better strategy might have been for Nephi to place Laban's feet uphill and his head downhill prior to the beheading.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: February 27, 2021 04:21PM

For heaven's sake, don't help EOD refine his plans.

You don't want to be charged with aiding and abetting!

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: scmd1 ( )
Date: February 27, 2021 06:21PM

My life is so boring right now that it might at least break the monotony.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: February 27, 2021 01:54PM

There is also the internal blood pressure. If you sever one of those big arteries, blood will most definitely spray out.

--Speaking for a friend

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: February 27, 2021 02:31PM


Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: February 27, 2021 02:39PM

Enough to ruin your church shirt.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Dorothy ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 01:25PM

Right up there with soldiers lining up to get their arms lopped off.

I've heard the BofM described as Bible fan fiction.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Brother Of Jerry ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 01:48PM

Hey, it happened to Monty Python's Black Knight.

BTW, I always thought Nephi should have responded to God "kill him? Why don't you keep him unconscious for a day or two? That sort of thing happens all the time. You're God, for your sake. Show a little initiative already."

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: ziller ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 01:36PM

in this thred OPie ~



no hab spiritual eyes ~



call the F B I ~



(Oo)
/||\



Laban had clear blood ~



diluted from the vodka ~



plz repent OPie ~



ʕ•͓͡•ʔ

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: CrispingPin ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 01:43PM

Clear blood. I bet he got that from drinking Crystal Pepsi.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: kenc ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 01:38PM

Your post reminded me of the million times I taught the BofM in Seminary and Institute (1972-2002), and I never questioned that particular story with enough enthusiasm.

I don't remember if the students did either. Seems like those inquisitive and skeptical HS and College students would have been smarter than me and questioned the whole story.

Funny what I was willing to gullibly believe! My wife never believed a word of it (any of it) from day one. She's way smart.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 01:51PM

Maybe bloody clothes were common? Maybe people, you know, didn't butt into other people's business?

It's not like they had Kleenex or Costco paper towels.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: CrispingPin ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 01:57PM

Why didn’t they have Costco paper towels? Was there a pandemic in Jerusalem that had people hoarding paper products?

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: February 25, 2021 02:03PM

The smart ones knew the Babylonians were coming!

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: lapsed2 ( )
Date: February 26, 2021 09:14AM

Oh that’s easy to explain...Nephi (or was it Moroni?) seduced the closeted Laban and got him to disrobe...he put the clothes out of splash range (next to his own), and THEN whacked Laban’s head off. That way it was quicker to put on Laban’s clothes to make his getaway. It’s so obvious.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: CrispingPin ( )
Date: February 26, 2021 11:15AM

Laban was intoxicated at the time, so this makes a lot of sense. He was probably feeling amorous.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: February 26, 2021 10:59AM

"Hey, Laban. Love the new color of your tunic. Would you call that cranberry or maroon? Goes great with your skin and takes years off your age!" said Zoram to Nephi.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: February 26, 2021 11:00AM

"But next time why not have it professionally dyed so your hands don't turn red as well?"

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Evergreennotloggedin ( )
Date: March 06, 2021 08:13AM

I would call the color blood red.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: February 26, 2021 11:04AM

Isn't it about time for the Mormon Apologists to claim Zoram was suffering from macular degeneration and was hard of hearing and bit thick on top of it all?

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: CrispingPin ( )
Date: February 26, 2021 11:18AM

Hydrogen peroxide is good for removing blood stains, and I'm not aware of any irrefutable evidence that hydrogen peroxide wasn't available in Jerusalem in 600 BCE. You're welcome, FairMormon.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: February 26, 2021 11:52AM

hahahaha Like, for sure. Kosher hydrogen peroxide. Why not!

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: February 26, 2021 10:28PM

Laughter. . . homeless shelter. 'Nuff said.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: messygoop ( )
Date: February 26, 2021 11:56AM

Fictional characters don't bleed.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: February 26, 2021 10:25PM

I once met a heartless woman.

I suppose that means she could have been bloodless?

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Dave the Atheist ( )
Date: February 26, 2021 11:16PM

A labian murder scene ?

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: February 26, 2021 11:18PM

... not gonna lie, she had me in the first half ...

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: mikemitchell ( )
Date: February 27, 2021 06:46AM

Beware of the mopologists who will argue that your observation actually proves the Book of Mormon true. In their sick and twisted version, the very God that made all evidence of ancient Middle Eastern civilization disappear from the Americas could easily overcome the volume of blood spilled in a decapitation.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: February 27, 2021 09:43AM

Well, I guess----that's if you could keep His Holy Attention long enough, though. I hear he got distracted and forgot to douse the burning bush and burnt down most of Mt Sinai. You know, no one has ever reported seeing Aunt Clara and God in the same room at the same time. Hmmmmnnnn

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: cludgie ( )
Date: February 27, 2021 12:54PM

A lot of us had to review the Daniel Pearl beheading. Trust me -- there is a helluva lotta blood, most of it gushing. Nephi could possibly have dressed in this guy's clothes, but only so long as he didn't mind looking like he or someone else just got horribly injured.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: February 27, 2021 01:05PM

"Hi Zoram. Don't mind this spot of blood. I cut myself shaving."

"How about I got caught in a briar?"

"Sharpening my sword and slipped?"


"Oh, Hell. Just get me the good stuff out of the safe?"

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Dr. No ( )
Date: February 27, 2021 03:10PM

from a fake character playing a fake scene from a fake book upon which is built a fake religion

(which wants above all else real money)

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Kathleen ( )
Date: March 06, 2021 11:04AM

Ha!

Dr. No, if you are indeed a real doctor, I bet your office has a heck of a waiting list ! :)

Options: ReplyQuote
Go to Topic: PreviousNext
Go to: Forum ListMessage ListNew TopicSearchLog In


Screen Name: 
Your Email (optional): 
Subject: 
Spam prevention:
Please, enter the code that you see below in the input field. This is for blocking bots that try to post this form automatically.
  *******   **         **    **  ********  **     ** 
 **     **  **    **   **   **   **    **  **     ** 
        **  **    **   **  **        **    **     ** 
  *******   **    **   *****        **     ********* 
        **  *********  **  **      **      **     ** 
 **     **        **   **   **     **      **     ** 
  *******         **   **    **    **      **     **