They’re pretty damn quiet when it comes to talking about what their children are doing. Everybody at work says my child is starting grad school, starting college, starting a new job, etc.

Not Mormons. They’re quiet as a church mouse because saying your 21 year old daughter is on her third child doesn’t sound like she’s going to be nominated for a Nobel Prize any time soon.

Isn’t this not tacit admission in their silence that they’re prioritizing the wrong things?

Yes, they are very quiet.

Instead of being in college or grad school, their sons are on missions to South America...well..not exactly South America...well actually...they are temporarily in inner-city Detroit and outer-city Orem, until the Covid controversy stuff is resolved and they can travel freely and whatever....

A lot of Mormon parents still brag about how many children their daughters have. Unless the daughters are unmarried.

My Mormon neighbor always brags about his adult children, but never mentions his oldest son. I asked about that son specifically, and he said that he and his wife never talk about him. The son refused to go on a mission 20 years ago, and they haven't seen or spoken to him since. (How can I be friends with people who would do that to their own son?)

I asked another Mormon neighbor about his son, that we haven't seen around for several years, and the neighbor said, "Oh, he's been in and out of rehab several times."

Don't ask!

What lovely families these folks are apart of... loving and understanding.

>> The son refused to go on a mission 20 years ago, and they haven't seen or spoken to him since.

What awful human beings.

What wretched people indeed!

When I was in my late teens, I only personally knew one person who chose not to go on a mission. He really sort of went wild: started drinking, ran with a pretty wild crowd, played bass in a band. He was a friend of a friend, and I vividly recall two things about the day I met him: 1) he pulled a bottle of something potable out of his Mustang, poured some on the ground, and lit it on fire to show how strong it was, and 2) that he had nearly gone on a mission and backed out at the last minute. Well, and a 3rd thing: he was a genuinely nice guy (i.e. not in the fake morgbot/TBM way).

To their credit, his parents did not disown him. FWIW, it was not in the Moridor, but a medium sized city in Georgia.

Gordon B. Stinky Wrote:
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> When I was in my late teens, I only personally
> knew one person who chose not to go on a mission.
> He really sort of went wild: started drinking, ran
> with a pretty wild crowd, played bass in a band.

He played bass in a band??? The horror!


--------------------
> FWIW, it was not in the Moridor, but a medium
> sized city in Georgia.

That explains your accent.

Hahaha! Err...I mean, haw haw haw! ;)

Actually, bass players have a reputation for being the boring ones. But, yeah, my sentence was poorly constructed. Being in a band in and of itself isn't "bad" (even if you play bass). But he definitely rebelled.

I was 17 when we moved there, so I never really picked up the Southern accent. I'm cursed with a generic military brat accent.

The only other Mormon I knew at that mission-appropriate age had been something of a wild child, but shaved his head and went. To this day, he's still TBM. Sadly, I lost track of the bass player.

Not so easy for the mormon kids either. I graduated near the top of my class in high school so I'd had classes with all the same group of honors kids. As badly as I wanted to go to my 10-year class reunion, I couldn't bring myself to go because I was embarrassed to see those same kids. We were 28 and they all had degrees and advanced degrees, great jobs and accomplishments. I had an Associates degree from a podunk Idaho junior college (Ricks), and was a housewife with 2 kids. Took me until my 30-year reunion, when I'd dumped mormonism and finally got my degree before I could face them.

Three friends who are sports photographers tell me the same story about Utah mormon area youth sports. All three have photographed pro sports for years with two being newspaper staffers in the past and one a team photographer. All three photograph youth sports using the same gear as NFL, MLB and NBA.

Young kids photos of them in game action sell pretty well. Much better outside Utah(Ut/Idaho corridor) - with sales almost double for the same age group Pop Warner games and such. Then after about 12 years old the sales fall through the floor - in Utah. In California, Oregon and Ohio sales still do well but same type of action photos in Utah fall away big time.

Each says it is as if once the kids hit Jr high age, boys and girls sports both - the parents seem to lose interest. Same type of photos that are fine with Sports Illustrated, major newspapers and such.

Maybe too many kids in a family? Who knows the reason. They tell me many friends who do this type of work have the same experience. For some reason heavily Mormon areas just don't seem to keep interested as the kids get older.

I think bragging rights in the Mormon church are all about church activity: "Little Billy was just ordained a priest." "Tiffany was called to be the Beehive president." "Jacob was called on a mission to Timbuktu." Church activity trumps other accomplishments. How can a parent brag about their star baseball playing child if the child won't go to church?

When I was in high school, outside the morridor, I was chosen to be the athlete of the month and had my picture in the school newspaper. The boy who wrote the article called my mom for information about me. She went on and on about my church accomplishments, which were printed in the next issue of the school paper. I about died. Good thing she didn't brag about me doing baptisms for the dead.

So sorry hb.

Youth are very fragile about embarrassing church service being paraded in front of non members.

My Mom thought that I was failing to score part time jobs because I wasn't listing important stuff like being a junior home teacher and serving as the Bishop's messenger.

Sure Mom!

It couldn't possibly be the demanding "I won't work Sundays because my God says it's immoral." That was piss-poor advice from the ph asshole leaders. Show them that you're a faithful mormon and the doors of opportunities will open up. Pure BS!

I think perhaps David O. McKay started that with his Mormon famous quote, "No other success can compensate for failure in the home." Church trumps all. I've seen it all my life, what you are talking about, newcomer.

Only one thing matters to Mormons more than making sure their family ALL goes to the CK, and that is the appearance that they are all going to the CK, and, you're not.

They can't impress non Mormons like they can impress/make jealous other Mormons, and so they don't even try.

"So what if your kid is a Rhodes Scholar. Mine doesn't drink coffee!"

The scariest aspect to McKay's quote would actually have been what, specifically, would qualify as "failure in the home" in his opinion, had he shared it.

He plagiarized that line, used it in conference a couple of times but it goes back several decades earlier to some conservative sociologist. I forget the man's name, although I have also heard it attributed to a 19th century British statesman.

The restoration of all things apparently includes the restoration of others' words.

Even though the words were lifted from another source, it remains disturbing to consider what McKay meant by "failure in the home." He probably intended it as a futuristic reference to the likes of us.

Well, we know that no other worldly success can compensate for failing the church.

But failing in the world means that you probably can't compensate the church. Yet another double-bind.

I don't know...missionaries are talked about all the time.

Actually, most mormons that I know incessantly post family photos on instagram.