Date: October 30, 2010 03:09AM
Ah, so many times I remember men standing before congregations and confiding with a misplaced knowing air the true reason why women didn't hold the priesthood: because men needed it as they weren't naturally as nurturing, i.e. spiritual, as women.
Mmm, brilliant indeed. How could any woman not help but be endeared to such a humble man who can acknowledge is less-worthiness due to his less nurturing personality... ;o) The innate spiritual superiority of women over men is a convenient little thing - why else would polygamy be the new and everlasting covenant, and not polyandry? Because more women than men are worthy to go to the celestial kingdom of course!
Naturally it never occurred to anyone that men might be less nurturing because of a certain hormone called testosterone which their fetuses are bathed in while still in the womb, and possess up to 20 times more of than women. Can the presence of a hormone be evil? Apparently.
But, as dutiful mormons, you needn't invent reasons for these strange doctrinal inequities, when historical precedent can readily answer your question. Here you have it: Women do not have the priesthood because ... they were LESS VALIANT IN THE PREEXISTENCE!!!
Bwahahahahahaha! Take that frumpy relief society speakers at general conference with your silly affected air of homey `I see the light inside of you` nurtury fluffiness! Take that Young Womens' program with your lame, self-indulgent and subjectively intoxicating 'I am a divine double-plus extra special daughter of my heavenly father who loves me cause I'm so special and divine, blah, blah, blah, I'm special, zzzz... snore.' Your paucity of testosterone won`t save you now spirit wife!