is that the church won't look at the problem and deal with it in a REAL WAY instead of thinking like straight mormon men. I had to deal with these type. I said it just the other day.
All I wanted when I went to the leaders about my "boyfriend" being gay was I wanted to know he would be okay, that he could find happiness, but they told me he was damned if he didn't change to straight. Think how different our lives would have been if he could have been with who he wanted to be and me the same, but no, some 40 years later, our lives haven't been easy. I hope that in some way our example has helped others.
I'm really grateful to any gay guys I've met on this board who gave me support and empathy, and told me that the mormon leader who was my friend was wrong when he said it was my fault my husband cheated on me. You can't imagine how much pain that one statement caused me. And the statements about it is my fault he isn't saved, that I gave up and didn't do my job. I wasn't righteous enough. I still have people say that.
This is no easy journey to make. I'd like to believe someday this will end.
Without Mormonism life is so much easier. Sleeping in on Sundays or working but no more church callings. I have put so much unnecessary pressure on myself when I was a Mormon. Instead of being happy that I was about to get married I was so scared of breaking the law of chastity. My 20 year old niece married a 35 year old woman last year. No feeling a guilt or shame they are happy and got married. Even after I got married I felt the need to get pregnant fast and multiply and replenish the earth. Crazy that I never really questioned the lds teachings, I just kind of followed along although I never liked polygamy so I did have some stuff on my shelf.