. . . he laid in state in the high-ceiling lobby of the Church Administration Building in downtown SLC, first for a private viewing by his family before the event was opened to the believing public.

I was there. The place was cool, low-lit, stark, eerily quiet and echoey. Not much was said by family members. As I experienced the scene, it was, frankly, a bit weird and strangely emotionless.

I asked inside the family circle what ETB's funeral program would entail and was told by someone high in the Benson clan hierarchy (this being as direct a quote as comes to mind):

"I don't know. The Brethern are in charge."

So in life, so in death. The ultimate fate of the Mormon.



Edited 10 time(s). Last edit at 11/16/2010 06:27PM by steve benson.

I remember that went by there with my dad as part of the believing public. It wasn't really part of the plan, we just happened to be downtown.

How ominous.
Like,
"The Brethern are in charge,
so I'm sure there'll be a
virgin sacrifice."

UT in the 90's. Um....wasn't there? Is this where you're going to tell me there's no Santa Claus?

There is no SANTA!???!?

*sob*

steve benson Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> "I don't know. The Brethern are in charge."


I'm guessing they must get their orders from the Brethren.

:o)

It should be up to nobody but the family how a funeral is run.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/16/2010 10:48PM by melissa3839.

When my husband recently passed,the few of our LDS neighbors who did attend the "funeral," were pretty surprised.

When I explained to the LDS Funeral Director that I wanted to just use a small side room, as we didn't expect a large crowd ... we wanted our friends, not just Sunday friends, he looked a little taken back!

We didn't sing songs, and no one played hymns, or even offered prayers! We celebrated his life by remembering the good times we had with him, with our family pictures, favorite popular songs we had danced to through our fifty-two years of marriage. And friends shared stories about their experiences with him.

Our 4-year old Great Grandson walked up in front of the group and told them how he was happy cause Great Grandpa could hear again now!

There was a twenty-one gun military salute by shaky old timers, who could hardly hold up the heavy rifles. But I reminded myself they would have been on those ships alongside my husband during the Korean War, as strong young men!

Yes, it was a warm, funny, heart-lifting experience, and I wouldn't exchange those hard metal chairs for soft pews any day!

What a wonderful way to celebrate your husband. Personal and positive and you were in charge. Congratulations. I'm sure your husband would have loved it!

When I was a bishop funerals were viewed as golden opportunities to preach the plan of salvation. The grieving family was not to be allowed to dictate how the funeral was conducted, to the point that speakers and musical items all needed approval of the bishop. The bishop was the concluding speaker so that the church got the last word in.

At the time I didn't see anything wrong with this. But that was when my mind was largely under the control of a cult.

It now sickens me that I was so insensitive to the needs and wishes of people who were already suffering the most.