If Elohim has a body of flesh 'n bones, and presumably Eloher has one as well, how come when the git jiggy wid it all they can produce is a baby spirit?

Isn't that like being a master champagne maker and all that ends up in the bottle is bubbles?

I'm confused.

Ron

that is as bad or maybe even worse than asking the question about how many angels can dance on the head of a pin.

Gwylym Wrote:
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> that is as bad or maybe even worse than asking the
> question about how many angels can dance on the
> head of a pin.


Now that you mention it, how many?

Oh I am going to hell for this one.

Every sperm of God is sacred and is perfect. So it only takes one God sperm to fertilize a Goddess egg. Now since these are perfect and since they live on or around Kobol, I mean Kolob, when the two meat its like matter and anti-matter meeting and a tiny little explosion occurs which is the creation of the intelligence, errrrr, spirit.

Now since God can pump out lots of sperm since hed is perfect, he needs to be able get jiggy with lots of wives so he can make lots of spirits.

Gwylym Wrote:
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> Oh I am going to hell for this one.
>
> Every sperm of God is sacred and is perfect.

Been watching much Monty Python?

I used to have this theory that Elohim must have been a white and delightsome caucasian kind of guy. And all the Elohers were different races. Hence, when babies are born into the world we have the chinese, africans, arabs, etc. I figured he was more attracted to the chinese Elohers so he produced more of them for this world than other races.

As I've been thinking about your question, I remembered a term that my TBM brother once used. He said that we are all "Gods in embryo" So maybe earth is part of the womb and we won't actually really be born until we die.

Then again, that dashes out the whole pre-existance and war in heaven doctrine.

Or maybe we're all just sperm and eggs! God I hope he's not just masturbating!

because if all he gets from screwing his wife is a baby that doesn't have a physical body, then he's a genius because he's exempted himself from having to hear the crying during the night, the poopy diapers, the teething..etc

Yeah, that's my wacky two cents...of course, I'm talking to hear my own voice so to speak on this one...I don't think that there is God and that this is just five minutes of my life I will never get back in reading and answering this post :)

What about the war in heavan when we were supposedly given a choice about some crappy plan involving sending us away from god and getting us back to god in about 75 earth years.

How can babies make that choice? Or are they born as babies, then they need to grow and mature into adult spirits to join the heavenly war? Who raises them? What do they eat? If god can create Eve from Adams rib, not to mention the universe, why can't he create spirits without physical sex?

The Mormon god sure has a lot of human flaws and traights.

I seriously laughed my ass off at the opening post. That made my day.

burning bossom Wrote:
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> I seriously laughed my ass off at the opening
> post. That made my day.

That's half the battle. We sometimes take ourselves all too seriously.

Ron