The Oncoming Storm - bc
Date: July 27, 2012 10:34AM
You are in an interesting spot on your journey that many/most of us can relate to. As others have said you don't have to rush to figure this all out.
One thing you have asked is if you should go back and try to regain what you have lost. I went that route. More than once. I could feel the spirit, but I could never really recapture it because in the back of my mind the truth was still there. I could try to mask it & hide it, but the truth was still there.
However, when you are ready to walk through the door and forget about what you have lost (I don't deny you have lost something even though it was based on something that is not true) you will find that what you gain is much better than what you left behind.
Whether you keep attending is a very personal decision based on your circumstances, the impact on your family, timing, etc. Over time you will likely find it is more and more painful to continue to end.
Also another thing will likely shift with time. For a long time I thought of the Mormon church overall being not true but still being a very good thing with a few bad apples. Over time I have come to see it different - that there very structure and organization of the church causes the members to behave in bad ways that they normal would not - it's not a black/white thing, but there are very definite problems that push people to behave negatively.
One of those problems is that the local lay clergy - e.g bishops are given way to much power and authority. Members are basically taught that these people represent Christ. Sometimes that is OK when the bishop is a good person. Unfortunately, all to often, the church is empowering an abuser.
One bit of personal advice. If you are still paying tithing, stop doing it or at least minimize it as soon as possible. The time will come when you will be very upset about the money you have been scammed out of. The money that you paid during the transition period will hurt the most - I speak from personal experience.
Keep learning. If you haven't already seen them I highly recommend these:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ac_fLUHiBw
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/27/2012 10:34AM by bc.