Today was a very good Christmas day. DW and I spent yesterday afternoon cooking and baking, and we enjoyed wine and champagne while we cooked. Spirits make the spirit much brighter as you are in the kitchen. Last night we giggled in bed and tried to sleep as we knew that Santa had come and brought us presents. This morning we got up and enjoyed unwrapping presents and just had a lovely morning. As the day went on we cooked and baked again while enjoying more booze, and later tonight we'll probably have a Christmas cigar.

Tomorrow we'll be meeting some friends to see a movie. It's been a great holiday so far, and we've broken so many rules from Mormonism. Broken "rules" that have actually enhanced our holiday than detracted from it.

This sounds like you had the best Christmas ever, I am so happy for you, a bit envious, but so very very happy for you. I cannot imagine such a thing, honestly. How wonderful, just reading your post brought a smile to my face.

Remember that you are free. You may be alone, but you are still free. And you will find people that genuinely care for you--not what ward you belong to, not what calling you hold, not what your "testimony" is-- but just for you.

Hang in there. Family is more than just blood.

May I ask how old you and your wife are, approx? Do you have children at home? I am supposing you are young and maybe real happiness is just for the young. I guess I missed it. I wish I would have left the church 40 years ago, I would not be having the heartaches I am.

I know you are a man and would like you to reply to my post about my realtionship with Colonel Moroni- I want a good man's opinion. I think it is still on the front page and I will watch for your reply RJ (Oh, my gosh, those were my ex's initials!) Thanks for your post here, we can all dream!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/25/2010 10:42PM by think4u.

And we don't have children, yet.

Children will come, when we both feel that it is right. I will respond to your thread in a moment.

I also saw that you seemed "new" on your journey and want to ask questions. Please feel free. I have my own opinions, but I know what I know to come to the conclusions that I have.

However, I understand that given the same knowledge some people will come to different conclusions. You are more than welcome to whatever knowledge I can help guide you on.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/25/2010 10:26PM by raptorjesus.

Ours was great. I thought I'd gone a bit overboard this year, but it was just enough.

Finally, after years of school it's starting to pay off. I was able to spoil our only child this year.

For those of you just on your way out or just finding out, this time of year can be hard. If your family knows you're out, there can be all sorts of shifts in the dynamic. You might get left out of a party, or you might get cornered and lectured.

Frankly, I'd rather be left out. I only have a few relatives I really want to talk to, anyway. And I am on the tail end of a diet, so don't want to be around piles of butter and sugar filled baked goods flanked by a token vegetable and some overcooked turkey.

I just loved your original post, so I read it again tonight. The colonel and I had an amazing day together, and I am hoping we might someday have a Christmas like you describe above. We are happier than ever and are now "Exclusive"- planning a private committment celebration with candles and the sharing of our own written vows, one to another. I am so in love with him and this has been one of the happiest days of my life. Somehow I just do not care any longer what my kids think.

I finally get that I must think first of my own happiness, and I know that I want to be with this good, kind man. The responses , including yours were all so very helpful to me, I really needed to hear the truth and then follow my heart. I did. I feel joy like I can never remember feeling since the birth of my kids. I have never loved or been loved like this before, and I am holding on, never letting him go again. Life is just too short, esp. at our age. All the best to you, and again, thank you for the good advice. I hope you and DW are always as happy as you are now. You give us all hope.

I'm glad that you found a good "compromise" (if that is even the right word to describe what happened). You've found your significant other, and that's really what matters.

My wife and I are married because we both feel marriage is right for us. But I do not believe at all that marriage is the be all end all for everyone. Everyone should find what works for them.

I hope that your arrangement works great for you. You both deserve it.

I hear ya! We really are in charge of our own happiness, and at the same time we are not in charge of anybody else's happiness. I don't know if it's Mormons, families, or just my family, but some of the older generation seem to want to give out assignments.

If my Grandmother would be honest about what's on her mind, she might say, "OK, grandson, it's your turn to make sure I have a Merry Christmas by hauling your ass almost 2000 miles from home and coming to visit me. And as soon as you get here, I'm going to lecture you on preparing your child for baptism and let you know how miserable you are because you drink coffee."

As for the OP, congrats! I had a drama free Christmas. When my child took a nap, I went to the gym. We didn't even cook anything special. Drama free, expectation free.

Merry Christmas, raptorjesus.

Best I ever had. The stress of the church is gone. I have a new you happy life.