My experience with LDS Social Services was actually realy good. My TBM DH drug me there over my faith crises. I was worried I'd get railroaded but the counselor actually told DH to cool it and quit villainizing me. I loved her. I could tell her anything. From what I could tell, all the counselors were licensed and degreed, etc.
When I was in UT and working on getting licensed there (which I abandoned), the Marriage and Family Therapy Board disciplined a therapist who prayed with his clients in session. I don't remember what else there was to it, but apparently he'd crossed the line with pushing his religious agenda.
robertb Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > When I was in UT and working on getting licensed > there (which I abandoned), the Marriage and Family > Therapy Board disciplined a therapist who prayed > with his clients in session. I don't remember what > else there was to it, but apparently he'd crossed > the line with pushing his religious agenda.
I wish it had been me that lodged the complaint. When I was first married about 10 years ago, we went to them for some help with the transition. The therapist wanted to pray before each session. I told him that I didn't want to. He did it anyway.
I wouldn't say it, so either he or me wife did. Everything was his way or the highway. He wanted us to hold a dumb piece of a dowel and hand it to the other person when it was their turn to talk. I told him it was silly, and that we could talk without passing it back and forth. He had us do it anyway.
He wasn't any help at all, and we went and saw one elsewhere that was helpful.
I think you may well have just struck lucky. One of my relatives had lds counselling where the counsellor told him not to trust any women they were just scheming witches trying to get men to marry them. Another counsellor told one of my in laws details about other's counselling - stuff they definately wouldn't want shared. I was friends with another lds counselor who told me stuff about a sister she had been counselling. I had to tell her to stop, I wasn't interested and she was supposed to keep confidences.
A good fit with the therapist is important. So, asking questions and being up front about goals and concerns is good. If prayer and scripture study is a concern, I'd bring it up.
One time experience with a marriage counselor from LDSSS ~ 5 years ago. Was completely inept and talked on and on about himself rather than actually start addressing the issues. And yes, it was a church-based approach because we both said we were members. I was closeted exmo at the time.
+1 Dh went to LDS Social Services about 5 years ago. He was given a therapist that had just started working there,had just started her career. Dh was in his 50's,9 kids,crappy marriage,much help needed in his personal life-and they give him a punk,brand new therapist with no experience. He tried to get his money back. Didn't work.
My TBM parents dragged our entire family to LDSSS in Detroit (we lived near Toledo OH) for therapy because we "had too much fighting" in our family. 7 kids, small house, poor, and fighting was their biggest concern. I found the whole thing very embarrassing.
If you are going there to try to figure out how to handle this trial of faith you are having, you will probably get all kinds of faith promoting advice like that.
When we had an issue with one of our teenagers, they did not use any kind of religious advice. However, the Bishop seemed to think he needed to be apprised of all progress. When we pointedly asked if our discussion were being shared with the Bishop, the person looked uncomfortable and we reminded her of the Laws regarding patient confidentiality.
We then dropped them and used and paid for a different agency out of our insurance.
That has been our only experience.
Other people we have known over the years have had mixed expeiences- because the Bishop will usually pay for it out of FastOffering funds, people feel compelled to go to LDS services.
But like any other counsellor, there are good and bad, professional and amateurish. But remember, the church owns them and it is in the churches interest that they operate.
When I went to LDSSS 18 year ago it was very church oriented, and the counselor was talking with my bishop about the sessions. I may have signed something allowing this, but don't remember. At the time I was trying to stay in the church. In retrospect I wish I was exed back then.
After my current bishop received my resignation, he stopped by my home and talked with us (myself and wife). He offered paying all of some visits to LDSSS, which just fortified by desire to leave. Does he really think I am leaving because I am broken and need fixing?
I also went to group sessions with my son, and they used Ensign articles all the time. They also expect you to pay at least 1/2 so that you are invested in the sessions, but they woudn't accept our insurance.
I have had good experiences there. DW & I went for marriage counseling. We got nothing but practical advice relating to our marriage. I went to another therapist there for my own reasons. When I first told him about my doubts in the mormon faith, he neither bore a testimony nor did he validate my feelings about the church. I got no faith-promoting diatribe from him at all.
It is kind of funny-a couple of months after I defected, DW asked me to come in to see her therapist at LDS SS. She took my side, asking DW, is he abusive? is he cheating on you? etc. In DW therapist's point of view, there were only three or four good reasons for divorce, and a difference of religion was not one of them. I go to see my own therapist, and he tries to make me understand my wife's point of view, without her being there. He just speaks from the standpoint that expectations going into the marriage are now not being realized, and that the change now has to be navigated.