So, I know that I keep ranting whenever my super TBM mother spews one of her guilt speeches to me, but I just had to ask if any of you have gotten this kind of accusation. My mom sent me an email last night and it went sort of something like this:

I think of you often and pray for your well-being and happiness. Even when you think you're alone or times get hard, always remember you are never alone. One day, if you start to care and find out the truth of the gospel for yourself you will be a whole new person full of relief and joy.

She still thinks I don't care. She thinks i'm lazy and scared of the truth. No matter what I've told her, she will never understand that what I have chosen and what I have done with my life concerning the LDS church, has been a big deal for me. It's not like one day I just decided the church was BS and threw it out the window and not cared about it. It has been a long, difficult process for me. It still is. I was extremely depressed during the beginnings of that process. My mom thought I was depressed because I gave up on god and the gospel. Actually, I was depressed because after many many months of tedious study and search, I found out that basically the basis of my entire life was false. I was depressed because I had been lied to. I had been living something that wasn't true, not because I chose to go against it.

Anyway, thanks for your input and I am taking everyone's prior advice very seriously. I always get great advice and I am trying to apply it to my situation. It is working. I just smile and say I love you to my mom and I never, ever bring up religion. And when she does, I don't really acknowledge it or try and change the subject as quickly as I can. Thanks again everyone.

rally

Sort of. I've been told that I should still 'worry' that TSCC might be true, and that I am arrogant for dismissing the probability as negligible.

My response: "Do you ever worry that Scientology might be true?"

When a TBM can explain to me why they don't worry about the reality of Xenu, they will have explained why I don't worry about Joseph Smith being a true prophet.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/18/2011 03:13PM by mateo.

Every friggin' day! There's some stuff that just doesn't deserve being cared about.... like:

Zamphir and his Pan Flute
American Idol
Justin Bieber
TSCC
Lindsay Lohan
Chevy Volt
and
Cocoa Puffs vs. Count Chokula

Ron

The answer to that question could determine the real happiness and course of your life.

Exactly my point. The amount of time spent worrying about TSCC is equivalent to the amount of time one should spend weighing the merits of Cocoa Puffs vs. Count Cholkula.

Cocoa Pebbles is the one and only true cereal,...There yabba dabba delicious!

Rallychild,

Rant all you want, but you are handling everything quite well in my opinion. Things will get better.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/18/2011 04:42PM by jon1.

"Gee, I found out the church is baloney, but I don't care. I'll stay because it's easier than the crap I'd get if I were to stand up for my principles."

^ LOL

Give the poor shmuck a little time to adjust.

Read carefully what your mother is really saying -

She writes that you are not ok in her eyes the way you are now.
She wants you to be a different person, one that is more to her liking.
She is convinced that this different you would be much happier.
To that end she is trying to pray away your freedom to chose.

Can't say that anyone sane blames you for walking away from that much emotional baggage.

Ugh. Keep ranting.

You could always reply, but it sounds like your situation is similar to mine with my mom. Telling her the truth about my thoughts and feeling regarding TSCC will just turn ugly and I really do believe my mom will never understand where I'm coming from. She's given over 60 years to this lie.

So I handle it the same way you are. It's passive, but it works for me. I try to focus on other subjects and when religion does come up I change the subject as quickly as possible.

After one conversation in which I told her I wouldn't be blessing my baby, she said, "Queen.(long pause)You are making me really nervous."

I said,"I know mom. I really don't mean to. I really don't want to hurt you."

I hope she remembers that. I hate that my choices are causing her pain, but I refuse to sacrifice my heart, mind, freedom... my life, just for her, no matter how much I love her.

Best of luck.

Frequently. And my response is blatantly honest. I *Do Not Care* about the F***ing cult, or about what it's brainwashed followers think.

Two things--

I think we are a threat to their own testimonies--so FEAR.

AND, this just occurred to me, for my parents' generation--there were excommunicated, disfellowshipped, or jackmos. There were VERY FEW IF ANY who came out and said they don't believe, so they are just buying into the stereotypes they've heard all their lives.

That is my parents' testimony of the church- believe or be sorry. Obey or suffer. God will let a bird crap in your eye if you aren't obedient enough.

It even seems that when they speak of Hope it is like 'I hope I'll be found worthy. or I hope I'll make it. I hope that things will be made right.' That isn't hope. That's dogged determination to avoid punishment.

Mum still lives in a cave.

I really like this allegory:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Allegory_of_the_Cave

It talks about life in the cave, the struggles of leaving the cave, what cave dwellers think of you for leaving, and what what you think of them.

Or, another way of looking at it.... remember that there are 7 billion humans on this Earth... (and giving the benefit of the doubt), 7 million active mormons. That's one in one thousand. Mormonism is insignificant... let alone worth a "what if" scenario.