I read the Dear Prudence advice column regularly on Slate.com, and the following was in today's column:


Q. Precious Future SIL: My brother recently announced his engagement to "Sally," a woman he has been dating for three years. Sally is very nice and seems to make my brother happy. However, she is a bit ... precious. She will correct any adult who uses a swear word; during discussions of R-rated movies she says things like, "Isn't is a shame people think the only way to tell a story is through bad language, sex, and violence?"; and she refuses to discuss any current events that are not feel-good news stories. My husband and I are careful not to offend her, but honestly, it is hard for me to think about being that careful at every family gathering for the rest of my life. I had lunch with my brother this week and gently brought up that his fiancée is a bit on the sensitive side. He said all of her preferences of entertainment (Disney/Pixar movies, the very occasional romantic comedy) and choice of hobbies (heavy on the arts-and-crafts) are geared toward very innocent things. My brother said that he loves her despite this. How can I learn to curb my language and conversation? Also: Is there any hope she will come around to the Dark Side?

A: It is not your job to keep Sally from getting the vapors. Sure, try not to use obscenities in front of her, but that's just basic good manners at social events. Otherwise, carry on. Let's hope Sally doesn't cover her ears and go, "Nah, nah, nah, can't hear you," when you discuss Game of Thrones or Syria. And surely any conversation will eventually turn to more anodyne topics. But if she can't stand adult topics, then she should hang out at the kids' table.

I realize this could potentially apply to anyone, but having read and learned a lot from this board about LDS culture, the references to Disney films, a horror of R-rated films, and arts and crafts really jumped out at me. Just curious if others think it's likely the guy's fiancée is Mormon.

She could be. Three years is a long time for a mormon to date and I think the poster would have mentioned a religious belief had it been there.

Ah, you're right. I hadn't noticed the "three years" part.

3 year engagement? I watched a few minutes of The Singles Ward recently; part of it was actually funny. One guy and girl got engaged; they met the week before at a hayride. It was so. . . Mormon. It was hilarious.

They'll know when they get an invite to stand outside a temple on their wedding day.

LOL!

She could be a Christian Scientist. There is a real scarcity of mariagable young men in that cult. The women tend to be rather prissy. But they're sweet and precious when they're young. What makes me think she's "CS" is "(Sally) refuses to discuss any current events that are not feel-good news stories." Christian Scientists go overboard on the positive thinking, believing that discussion, and even thinking of, negative things can contaminate their spirituality. Also, her avoidance of R-movies and strong language.

A 3-year courtship is not rare in CS. Whereas an LDS couple would get married and live in poverty, a CS couple would more likely postpone nuptials until their financial and career positions are strong. The inquirer's brother is in for a world of painful confusion if this isn't thoroughly talked through. These are the people who don't go to doctors, you know! So what about children's healthcare?

The problem with news sources like Slate is that the writers tend to be rather uninformed on religious issues. This letter writer gave off loads of religious signals, but "Prudence" was quite oblivious to them.